please help me my parents want to take me to one but if they find out im not tehy will be upset what should i do? Is there any confidelity between a patient and a doctor? Is your mom suppose to be in the same room when she checks you?
2007-02-27 03:56:04 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Ok it's ok relax dear!
The gynecologist will ask what you feel the most comfortable with (and honestly, if you are exam age then I doubt that he/she would even give the option of your parents staying).
Your mom will leave the room, and you'll be alone with the gynecologist. Be completely honest with him/her. He/she will most likely be able to tell that you have had sex and use tampons, but it's important for them to know these things because he/she needs to know what to check you for - and it's far more important to make sure that you are healthy.
Ask your gynecologist about confidentiality before you begin, and he/she will have to tell you. Most of the time they can't break that confidentiality unless they are concerned for your safety (for example, if they suspect that you are being molested, or that you have been raped). But...your gynecologist could clarify this for you.
If you are being hurt in some way then you shouldn't keep that a secret. It's important to get help in those situations. Also, if you need to be on birth control then you should discuss that with the gynecologist and you will probably have to talk to your parents about that.
I do really suggest being honest with your parents though. My parents found out that I was having sex because I wound up getting pregnant and I had no choice but to tell them. It was horrible! It's better just to get it over with. Parents are not stupid. They know that you are bound to have sex sooner or later. Your mum may end up being the best source of information for "female" troubles, and who knows..it may even make you closer.
2007-02-27 04:10:30 · answer #1 · answered by ladyofthemystnin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some women are not born with the physical pieces to indicate virginity. All doctors who this--a doctor will be able to tel though if you've had recent intercourse.
There is always confidentiality between a doctor and patient and the doctor will not speak to her if you won't allow her to.
I would call the office before the appointment and relay this message to the office staff, that you specifically do not want your parents to know the details of the exam. Legally the doctor can not go against your wishes, even if you are a minor.
If you don't want your Mom in the room, tell her in front of the doctor. Most likely the doctor will ask her to leave. Her being in the room can jeopardize your right to confidentiality.
It sounds like you are a having a lot fo problems with your parents. I would be honest with them about your activities and try to see it from their perspective. They want you to be safe; talking to them might help you avoid this kind of situation in the future.
2007-02-27 05:10:45 · answer #2 · answered by Waiting and Wishing 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's probably no way of telling outright if a girl's a virgin just from a visual examination. The Hymen can be broken any number of ways, including using tampons.
However, it is your responsibility to answer questions honestly and completely, and you will be asked to fill out a questionnaire...and one of the questions is whether or not you're sexually active. If you don't answer truthfully, then the doctor cannot treat any problems you might have.
Depending on your age, your parents may already suspect you're sexually active, hence their insistence that you see a gynecologist.
You may as well grow up and face the music....that's part of being mature. If you think you're mature enough to have sex, then you should be mature enough to own up to that fact.
2007-02-27 04:28:44 · answer #3 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The doc cannot tell if you are a virgin or not from examining you. Many women have their hymen broke playing sports or horseback riding etc so that is not a sign of a virgin. As for your mother being in the exam room that is up to you if you want her their or not. If you are sexually active though you do need to tell the doc though so she can make a note of this in your history. YOU have to be honest with the doctor. Also if you are sexually active you need a yearly pap/pelvic exam from now on. I am not sure why your parents are taking you to a GYN doc though as you didn't post that in your question. Usually your regular doc handles all of your medical needs unless it is "out of his league" so to speak.
2007-02-27 04:03:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is one of those situations that could have been avoided by not having sex.
The doctor can tell if your hymen is intact or not, but there are many things that can cause tears including exercise and tampons.
Your mom does not have to be in the room while you are being examined, but most likely she will be unless you insist to the doctor that she leave.
I am assuming that you are under 18. If this is true, your mother does have access to your medical information. This means that it is not likely that you will be able to keep this from your parents.
Perhaps it is time to come clean to your parents and tell them what you have been doing. They may ask that you be put on birthcontrol. It is possible that they want you to see a gyn doctor because they suspect you have been having sex. This is a good time for you to act like an adult and own up to it. discuss birth control options with you mother and continue to use condoms.
Good Luck.
2007-02-27 04:06:03 · answer #5 · answered by Gypsy Girl 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Okay, may I first say, you shouldn't keep secrets from your parents. I did, and it was horrible. But the answer to your question is they won't tell. My parents didn't know I was having sex, and I wound up and caught an std. So my mom had to take me to the doctor for a routine check-up. My pap came back abnormal, and I had to have all kind of things done to me. So my mom knew something was wrong, but my doctor told my mom that I had abnormal cells because of my tampon rubbing the cells wrong. She lied for me. All I did was ask her to do that. But in the end it still came out and it sucked having to keep all of that to yourself.
2007-02-27 04:10:54 · answer #6 · answered by ssweetipie71382 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just took my daughter to get her first pap smear and the doc told me he couldn't discuss anything unless my daughter said it was OK, because of the doctor patient confidentiality. That is if you're 18 or older. Plus the doctor said it was up to my daughter if I could be in the room or not and tampons do not effect your virginity
2007-02-27 04:14:57 · answer #7 · answered by cmtrots 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the doctor cannot reveal that info without your concent. You can also request that your mother not be in the room, however if you don't request it they will probably ask your mother to stay because of liability issues. But due to the HIPPA laws they cannot reveal any information without your permission. Tampons by the way do not penetrate the hymen you are out of luck with that excuse
2007-02-27 04:02:30 · answer #8 · answered by wombatwaz 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Doctors won't tell your parents for the most part unless they see something unusual. My mom wasn't in the same room when I was checked. Just say, "Mom please!" And maybe she will stay out.
2007-02-27 04:01:59 · answer #9 · answered by karenhar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way a gyn can tell if you are a virgin. Sometimes through sports and activty your hyman can tear or become not evident. Also I don't think that your mom can be in there unless you want her there.
2007-02-27 04:00:50 · answer #10 · answered by L♥G 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋