He wants to have closure on a bad period in our lives but will not let go
2007-02-27 03:09:54 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
why don't you try counselling?
2007-02-27 03:12:19 · answer #1 · answered by flyingconfused 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's only one solution to this. He has to be told "Look....this is the truth...period". From that point on you have to drive home the point that this is the absolute last time this comes up as a topic of discussion. Because there is no way on God's green earth any of this is going to heal unless he lets go.
If he can't accept this than tell him..."Look...I love you..always will too but I have no intention of living my life like this and under a constant shawdow of doubt. If you cannot trust me in what I'm saying now or in the future and just forgive (if that is necessary) past problems then I don't think I can live this way with you for the rest of our lives".
You may wish to polish it up but I think you get the general idea.
2007-02-27 03:35:05 · answer #2 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is take him by the hand, look him in the eye and tell him that you are being 100% honest. If he still doesn't believe you, there is not a lot you can do to convince him. He has to trust you and there isn't much you can do if he can't. Counselling or therapy might help.
2007-02-27 03:32:28 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have been a habitual liar throughout your marriage, he will NEVER believe you....regardless of whether it's the truth or not. All you CAN do, is tell the truth to him.....if he accepts it, fine. If not, that's fine too! The Bible says, "And having done all, to stand"! Truth will stand when all else fails.
2007-02-27 03:27:58 · answer #4 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't. He is going to have to resolve in his own mind to either believe you and let it go or not believe you and let it go.
Going thru the same thing right now and have decided to separate for a number of reasons. You have to make up in your mind what is best for you!
2007-02-27 03:16:02 · answer #5 · answered by Apple21 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is inherently hard for men to accept change and/or failure on their part or their counterpart. if this rough patch was due to infidelity from either party, the man will think it's his fault.(his fault for not satisfying you, his fault for making a bad choice and hurting you) tell him what's happened has happened and whatever it is, it should stay in the past where it is instead of hurting both of you now.
2007-02-27 03:16:32 · answer #6 · answered by mistressmorro 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You tell the truth, whether or not he accepts it is up to him. You have no control over it. Some things can't be fixed and if you did one of those things, then there is a price to pay.
2007-02-27 03:16:00 · answer #7 · answered by David P 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
turn a new leaf entirely. Infact you must be born again in all ways. don't forget he knows u inside out. only a new begining will change his opinion positively about your past.
2007-03-01 21:08:02 · answer #8 · answered by oshokhameye 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a bad thing, i know, when problems linger in someones mind for so long its hard to let go, he has the problem not you, he needs the help to get over whatever it is.
2007-02-27 03:19:19 · answer #9 · answered by Jessica B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he can't let go of the past then maybe he is hanging on to it just to rub your nose in it. (so to speak)
2007-02-27 03:14:40 · answer #10 · answered by Pamela 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you love, you've been honest, and that you want to look forward to your future together.
Tell him dwelling on it will darken the time you have together now.
2007-02-27 03:13:10 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋