There is a married couple that my husband and I have known for a long time. We went to visit them at their home and meet their first baby who is 2 months old.
They spoil him a lot, which I totally understand. (They say you can never "spoil" a newborn).
However, she took us on a tour of the nursery and the crib (where he sleeps) was FILLED with stuff. The changing pad, boxes to keep the wipes and diapers were in one half, and he slept in the other half. This made me very nervous.
THEN, I saw that in the 1/2 of the crib that he slept in there were THREE very fluffy, very loose, very big blankets. I asked my friend if those blankets were in there when he sleeps, and she said Yes, because he gets cold.
I wanted to scream, but I held my cool and just nodded my head. Do you think that I should send her an email with some information on SIDS? Should I just let it go? Im really worried that the baby is in danger, but I dont want to overstep my boundaries.
HELP!
2007-02-27 03:03:53 · 9 answers · asked by Soon2BMommy 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I am not jealous of her. I am pregnant with my own baby, so I have been reading up on all of that stuff. I am truley worried for her child.
I could call her, but she never answers her phone. I dont want to leave a voicemail with all that info, so thats why I am considering the email. I can site sources too, which I know she will appreciate.
2007-02-27 03:15:00 · update #1
Oh, and she lives in California and i live in Texas. My husband and I were on vacation.
2007-02-27 03:15:26 · update #2
Just reading this situation concerned me as well. I understand your concern. My son pulls anything within his reach over his face. I have turned my back for a second and he put a blanket over his face! it is scary... I would truly email her with information on SIDS... I would definitely approach this in a gentle manner. Maybe camouflage the message by sending an email entitled "the new mommy initiation" "things all mommies should know" include all of the information about SIDS and anything else that you can think of, and then end the email with "Welcome to the Mommy Club" congratulations. That way it wont seem like you are calling her out. Instead it will be welcoming her into mommy-hood and giving her the sense that she is a part of a team as well as giving her that vital information.
2007-02-27 03:32:13 · answer #1 · answered by Chynah D 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How would you feel if your friend were to call you crying that her baby suddenly died for no apparent reason (SIDS)?
I know, obviously that couple knows nothing of child safety, and as a friend, it would be the right thing to let them know the possibilities of what can happen based on the risk you see them taking. Remember, it is not what you say, but how you say it. If this couple invited you into their home to meet their newborn, what you can do is ask them in a non-biased way, example, "Don't you think leaving the blankets so lose is a bit dangerous, I read this article on SIDS......" That is a good way of telling them the danger they are putting their newborn in. They will appreciate your concern, insight and information.
2007-02-27 11:29:33 · answer #2 · answered by Shayshay 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe find a great magazine with an article in it about SIDS or the risk of suffocation. Then just pass it off to her and tell her that it was an awesome magazine that you thought she may like as well. Email her just some good info on SIDS and tell her that you thought it was valuable info since she just had a baby. Try to keep it positive and not demand that she change her ways because that isn't going to do anything for you nor her. Some people are just not as educated on this stuff.
2007-02-27 11:15:21 · answer #3 · answered by mommy of two 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If I were in your position I would defiantely try to tell them that it is dangerous to have all that stuff in the babies crib.... It may not cause SIDS but it can definately cause a huge hazard for suffocation... As far as over stepping your boudaries... Think of it as what and how would you feel if god forbid something terrible happened to that baby because of all the stuff in the babies crib? Sometimes the truth hurts and they need to know it... Send them the email and hope they get the message that you are not trying to mettle or cause trouble but that you are concerned and don't want anything to happen to the baby.
Good luck
Tracy
2007-02-27 11:11:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you could send the info in a way that makes it sound like you're sharing interested information, not as a negative "change your ways now". I totally think that she is putting that precious baby at risk of suffocating, and it wouldn't be SIDS, it would be child neglect and murder.
2007-02-27 11:10:18 · answer #5 · answered by casw1 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't seem to me that SIDS is as much of a concern as the stuff he could potentially choke on, could swallow, or could suffocate him.
You might gently ask why the things are in the crib, and express your concern. Be honest but kind. Perhaps she is planning on moving the things as soon as the baby begins to move around more.
2007-02-27 11:22:08 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda M 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you should tell your friend about all the stuff that may cause danger to the baby. Talk to her better than email.
2007-02-27 11:12:31 · answer #7 · answered by frozenyumiko 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
SIDS has nothing to do with how many blankets a baby uses or doesnt use. Its a defect tat causes SIDS. You may not like this, but you seem to be jealous or envious verses worried.
2007-02-27 11:09:34 · answer #8 · answered by KATHY A 2 · 0⤊ 6⤋
Unfortunatley, you probably shouldn't say anything. I understand where you are coming from and I wouldn't want to see that stuff either or do that...but it's really not your place to say anything, they probably won't change their minds anyway.
2007-02-27 11:26:18 · answer #9 · answered by kittynala 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋