Please don't consider me a bad parent...my seven week old is very, very fussy. Some might call it colic, but honestly she sometimes does her bored/cranky cry, and I can easily tell the difference between this and a pain cry. Some days she will cry her cranky cry nomatter what I do....I'll swaddle her, rock her, dance with her, put her in a sling/baby bjorn, put her in her bouncy seat, drive her around the block, run the vacuum/hairdryer for white noise....and nothing seems to work. I can't even get her bottles made or grab something to eat. Now this isn't every day, but it happens frequently. Can I let her cry for a bit? I had to today to make her bottles up, and I went back to carry her around in about 10 minutes and she fell fast asleep.
I've always believed you can NOT spoil a baby this young, but then I never had one that could keep this up all day at times. I am not sure how to handle it....as I said, she's not in pain, eats well, sleeps well at night..what to do?
2007-02-27 00:22:59 · 11 answers · asked by kath_08012 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Leaving her to cry for 10-15 minutes is perfectly harmless even at this young age. She will eventually learn to soothe herself. It may be that she's tired and everything you do, no matter how well intentioned, is keeping her awake. Just letting her cry for a little while will allow her to calm herself down enough to sleep (bizarre as it sounds, it actually works). It will also give you a chance to go to the toilet, make yourself a snack or a drink. You need those few minutes to yourself. If it gets too much just leave her in a safe environment and close the door, going to another room for 10 minutes. It will help to drown out the noise of her crying and will give you some much-needed peace.
2007-02-27 00:27:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are a bad parent. My husband and I have a 16 month old girl and we still don't always know what to do. It is just learning. When I was on maternity leave, and my husband had to go back to work after 2 weeks, I was left on my own with her until she was 3 months. She did have colic. but yes, it is OK to let her cry. Some people say no and some say yes. I didn't like to listen to it, but sometimes I just had to because I had other things that really needed to get done. I couldn't bring myself to let her cry for more than 10-15 minutes though. But sometimes she would stop on her own and that would give me some more time to do things. And contrary to what others will most likely say, I agree with you in that you cannot spoil a baby that young. This is a major time for you and the baby to bond. Holding her and comforting her will only teach her to trust you and in the long run, she may be more independent because she knows that you will always be there. Good luck!
2007-02-27 08:30:41 · answer #2 · answered by tmac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like colic to me. You cannot "spoil" a baby this young. She's been inside you for 9 months, all warm and safe- never felt sick or hungry. Now she's learning to live seperate from you. The first 3 months are crucial as infants don't realize they are a seperate person from you. Hold her all you want, even if she doesn't stop crying.
My baby is 5 wks old and has developed colic and screams and screams and nothing I did helped. I read about something called gripe water for colic- and IT WORKS. I found some at wal-greens and it was called "Tummy Soother" and it had the Disney logo on it. Try that, you'll be surprised how well it works. It's been so nice having my happy baby back!
PS it is NON-alcoholic. a lot of people think it's not.
2007-02-27 09:11:57 · answer #3 · answered by c'estmoi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For a start, you are not a bad parent! In fact, it looks like you went on overdrive for your daughter, which happened for a period of time for my second son too! My wife does everything she could but just seems to be helpless.
We seek our doctor and read the entire Internet to get what you seek and conclude, for very young child, they need the presence of their parent physically as they are so used to be cuddled in the womb. So cuddling is good but if it continues into the third month onward, it may become a habit...so,it may be wet diaper, hunger pang that usually caused them to cry. Or it may well be the ambience heat (room temperature) too high...
Lastly, prioritize a little. A little cry (can be up to 20 minutes a stretch) is fine for the baby, in fact it help in the lung development! Have time for yourself, dear! Take a nice shower, eat properly, then attend to your kid. In fact, try not to neglect your husband too! Kids revolves around the parents, not the other way, or you will lose your sanity!
O yes, after each feed, you must learn to burp your kid off or she will be very uncomfortable with the trapped air in the stomach on each feed.
These symptoms will go away after 5-6 months...
2007-02-27 08:36:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this sounds funny but i used to do lunges with my 2nd for hours to keep him from crying the best advice i can give is calm down babies are like mommy barometers being upset only makes it worse get a native sling they're really cheep and slop him in it and instead of trying to make him stop forget about the little one and just get things done work (laundry works wonders for my lil one all the bending down and changing positions trying to get the clothes out the washer) try to do things that keep you moving around u might find that after a while u have a quiet baby......another thing it seems that when we hold and walk with babies we tend to sway and swoop and walk in a much more soothing rocking boat kinda way sometimes that's not what baby wants/need they just wants that same lazy totter u had when you were pregnant.......hope that helps good luck
2007-02-27 09:05:19 · answer #5 · answered by adriannemae 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
letting a baby cry 5-10 mins is ok any longer than that is signs of neglect. if you pick her up straight away she will know if she crys you will be there. then she gets her own way. having a baby is a bit like havin a teenager lol! so let her know ur not always gonna be there let her cry for a bit then she will realize that ur not always there and shes not getting her own way. but good-luck any way and remember let her cry! xx
2007-02-27 08:50:07 · answer #6 · answered by natalie g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the first a baby cries and you come running they have figured out how to wrap you aroud their little finger. if its just a bored cranky cry then let her cry. you have to do that. otherwise she will be spoiled and always cryin to get what she wants. that is how you are firm with baby. like you saw she will tire and sleep
2007-02-27 08:27:53 · answer #7 · answered by .......... 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First, take her to a chiropractor. If is is colic he can help cure it. Secondly it that dont work you can let her cry for a while if you are sure that it is not anything else. She will eventually grow out of this stage. I know your nerves are gone now but hang in there and good luck.
2007-02-27 08:30:35 · answer #8 · answered by LRCMT 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you can't help your baby if you neglect yourself to the point where you become exhausted.. our son cried and cried when we put him in his crib, and we didn't rush to pick him up every time he cried.. he's six months now and he's a very happy healthy baby.. it's not bad to let your baby cry.. especially since you can tell the difference between a pain cry and an angry cry..
2007-02-27 08:27:56 · answer #9 · answered by Byakuya 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have a book suggestion...worked wonders for me. "The baby whisperer: How to calm, connect and communicate with your baby."
2007-02-27 08:43:40 · answer #10 · answered by kittynala 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋