i have 2 boys ages 6 &8. my exhubby has custody, i gave him custody due to better financial stability (when i had custody it was 50/50 custody which means no child support &his family would have nothing to do w/ me & my family works which meant i had no help & couldnt afford child care) my ex refused to help me with childcare even tho he was able. as soon as i signed them over he began keeping them from me, our divorce stated i had "reasonable and liberal" visitation which means when he wants me 2 see em. since then ive gone 2 court & got all my visits set im happy w/that but hes now extremely alienating them from me more so my 6yrold , every other wk im spekin w/ social wrkrs due to fals allegations & hes told 6 y old im the step mom &smom is real mom, it took 7 mos to cler this up w/son but now hes continuosly putting me down &my home &so is his family what can i do? i tried to go thru ss & they say they cnt make em put kids in couns. its killin me to see kids go thru this! help!
2007-02-26 23:43:27 · 13 answers · asked by somerandomchick 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to get an attorney and take him back to court. I don't know why you say with 50/50 custody there is no childsupport. Unless you and he make the same amount of money, there should be some consideration for childsupport. Even if you are right and there isn't, there is always welfare and other ways of supporting your children. Boys that age need their mother. The problems you are having with them right now might not be all their fault, you need to take some of that blame also. Imagine how abandoned they feel. They don't understand why mommy isn't there.......and are you going to tell them it's because of money?
Your kids might need counseling, but they need their mother more. You need to go through the steps to get them back.
Not sure why social workers are involved.....that sort of tells me there is more to the story here.
2007-02-26 23:51:56 · answer #1 · answered by salemgirl1972 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My daughters father and family tells her things that are horrible too. She came home 2 nights ago saying that him and his sister were telling her that I was evil and a di-k and a bi-ch and this goes on every visit. She is 16 with a syndrome and he messes with mind like this since she was little. I have been to court through the years and nothing has ever been done. He pays no child support and rarely even shows up for a visit and brings her home a couple of hours later. he totally violates the visitations. I work and provide the medical, all clothes, lunches at school, pay for prescriptions . I do it all. So I can understand how frustrating this is for you. There should be better laws to help when you have these problems. There are more strict laws when facing animal cruelty than with child cruelty.
2007-02-27 00:14:51 · answer #2 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it would be best if you seek custody again. In New Jersey the court's can force counseling on parents and the court's can issue orders for parents not to use any negativity when referring to other non-custodial parent. They can't do anything about in-laws, though. You need to talk to a good therapist and see how they recommend you deal with this also. Contact your local Bar Association or Lawyers Assocation for referral to an attorney who specializes in this type of situation. Good luck and God Bless.
2007-03-06 06:17:33 · answer #3 · answered by tersey562 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TAKE HIM BACK TO COURT get your kids back at home with you ...if there is a will there is a way..i have 2 kids and a full time job (40 to 60 hrs.) and i raised my 2 by my self for a long time till i got married 2 years ago .. pray child pray only god can help ya now!!!!!
2007-03-05 18:48:40 · answer #4 · answered by GEN-GEN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All i can suggest is to take him back to court..and to get more visitations with ur child, the more u with ur children, the more they will see that what they are being told IS NOT true, and they will be able to form their own oppinions of you.. although i realize u felt what u did was for the best of the children ur finding out that it wasnt.. and he took a "power trip" out of getting control of his children.. You need to justify everything to the judge let the judge know what is happening and that u want more time with ur children, that u have shared custody and your entitled to having ur children for a bulk of the year.. I suggest u get a child addelitum involved, they will do what they feel is best for the children...and i would ask the courts to Make your x husband and his wife, go to parenting classes.. I would try and set up my children to go to a counselor while they are with me, example YOUR ENTITLED TO ATLEASTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT Wed's during the week.. so set up counselors on Weds and take ur son, and then u can pull her into court to justify what is going on, YOU DO NOT need ur husbands permission to send ur child to a counselor..
2007-02-26 23:53:32 · answer #5 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can document this things you say, then use it in court to get custody of your kids and force him to pay up. The guy isn't good for your kids since he is doing everything to keep you away.
2007-03-04 18:15:30 · answer #6 · answered by forlanda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Instead of letting him have the kids, you should of kept them and hit him up for hefty child support. He's taking full advantage of this and you need to hire an attorney. You've got your work cut out for you now.
2007-02-27 00:31:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the friend of the court and work out a new situation one that can be accommodating to you as well.
2007-03-03 06:23:08 · answer #8 · answered by nadine_forbear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is unfortunate that the kids are in the middle of this. after some time (maybe years) the kids will understand that dad is unreasonable. in the meantime, improve your own situation. take a spelling refresher course and get better employment.
2007-02-27 01:25:19 · answer #9 · answered by sinned 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to go back to court, so the Judge knows this... i dont care HOW much money i had, i wouldnt have given the kids to my ex... the decision you made is the reason this is happening
2007-02-26 23:53:13 · answer #10 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋