I found out today (2-26-07) that my cousin is having a child with a 20 year old and she is only 15.......should i forgive her and take her back in as a cousin or disown her and refuse to give her any help and support....she is also getting married....need help ASAP!!
2007-02-26 13:30:25 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Why would that make you want to disown her? doesn't make sense. You should support her.
2007-02-26 13:33:00 · answer #1 · answered by tristarr212003 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is up to you. If it was me, I would try to support her after you explain to her why it was hard for you to come to that decision. She made a mistake. Period. There is nothing she or you can do about it now and not helping her out will only harm the innocent baby more. Of course, I don't know the whole situation, but it seems that she is trying to make it as right as possible. If she loves him then getting married and providing a stable home for the baby is the best she can do and the most you can expect out of her. She may seem excited about getting married & having a baby but don't confuse this with thinking that she doesn't understand what it happening or that what she did was wrong. She may full well understand her actions but is trying to look on the bright side. Since she can't take it back now, all she can do is her best and that's all that you can expect from her. God Bless!
2007-02-26 21:39:28 · answer #2 · answered by Amanda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do have a right to be angry to a point. But no I do not think that you should disown her. She is about to take on two of the hardest things a woman can be a wife and a mother. She is so young she will need help and support. Just talk things over with her and try to be helpful as much as possible.
2007-02-26 21:35:38 · answer #3 · answered by Misty M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do you care? If you disowned her over her being pregnant by a pedophile, then, you really never had a good relationship with her. It's really none of your business. And actually, her parents should have the guy thrown in prison. SO, I really think that your family might be a little on the dysfunctional side.
2007-02-26 22:27:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should not disown her you should be there for her my sister is 15 and she is having a baby by a 19 year old she doesnt understand that he is not right for her and is not good for her but she wants to be with him so i have to accept that even if i dont like him and he does nothing for her he only wants to be around her when he wants to have s** at least you r cousin is getting married to the older man so be there for her because if it doesnt work out she is going to need you more than ever so even if you need to just distance yourself for a while because you cant pick who you are related to you just have to deal with it i hope this helps you
2007-02-26 21:42:54 · answer #5 · answered by third times a charm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever you do dont disown her. She is gonna need your help no matter what bad decisions she has made, she needs you now more than ever and you should help her out. You may not approve but there is no going back and changing it now. So tell her how you feel (nicely) but tell her that if she needs something she can come to you!!
2007-02-26 22:55:49 · answer #6 · answered by Chusa_Loca 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If anything you need to support her. that is what we call unconditional love. you may not like the fact that she is having a baby at 15, but you love her anyways. I am glad that the father is sticking around and taking on the responsiblites that come with being a parent. the LAST thing she needs now is for you to turn your back on here. I promise you that once you see that baby, you will fall in love.
2007-02-26 21:37:21 · answer #7 · answered by carriec 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would forgive her.
I was 16 when i got pregnant and my entire family disowned me. they thought i would be a terrible mother and just live off the state.
They never gave me a chance.
Come to find out...i am a great mom! And i got to school and work full time...and my kids have a great life and they are missing out on it.
Especially my cousin who was like my best friend...now her mom brain washed her into not talking to me and now she is missin gout too.
It makes me sad when I think to my self how none of them eve show up to the kids birthday parties. How they didn't come to the baby shower or the hopsital...or anything...not even the wedding!
It isn't the kids fault and they are taking it out on them...
Give her another chance and help her out if she needs it...trust me you will be missing out on something great. And hurting a fmaily that just doen't need hurting
2007-02-26 21:35:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that this of all times is when she would need love and support. God forbid you were in the same situation, how would you feel if someone close to you abandoned you during a difficult time. I think you should call her right now and tell her you're sorry.
2007-02-26 21:39:45 · answer #9 · answered by Johanna S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give me a break. I'm 27 and my girlfriend is 17. We are happy and she's great. Keep your opinions out of the relationship and be there for her. Every family has a bigot. Don't make that person be you.
2007-02-27 14:12:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't disown her....she. too, is a child, one who obviously has not has the proper upbringing. You stop and think: There But For The Grace of God, Go I.
2007-02-26 21:39:59 · answer #11 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋