What is the best way to approach someone if you want to get to know them?

Question

I just moved to a new city for a few months and I want to make some friends, but I am kind of shy about approaching people. At a bar, coffee shop, etc., is it weird to just go up to someone, introduce yourself and be like, "Hi, I am new in town..." etc.? What is the best way to do this?

Answer 1

Usually, the "Hi, I am new in town..." doesn't work. I am a military brat, so I have childhood expertise in this subject matter. I guess it comes with the territory of moving all the time. My advice - conversations start better when 1) you have a compliment to give, 2) you have something or someplace in common or 3) you have a question (fake or real). So, here are some ideas

1) If you see someone with a cute dress or hairstyle. Or, even a guy who smells nice or looks rather dapper - You go up and say "Excuse me, where did you get that _________? It is so cute!" Once they tell you where, you say - "What side of town is that store on? I'm knew here an I am still trying to find my way around"...That will usually start a conversation......

2) Another example is to find commonalities. If your at the gym, the common denominator is working out. So, after a workout, if someone is sitting in the locker room, say something like "Lord, this workout thing is killing me!" If they respond, BINGO! Start a conversation

3) And finally, asking a question always works. You can ask those anywhere to anyone. "Excuse me, where is this place?" "Excuse me, do you know any other place in town that has great Indian food?" These are great gateways to conversation.

The key in all of this is to be bold and friendly. Put yourself out there - that's the only way to do it.

Answer 2

Start by complimenting on how funny their shirt is or ask if they have ever tried the "You insert the food item" bc you want to know if it's good. Once you've tried it, tell them how good it was and thnx for the suggestion! Simple things like that are a good way to start and if the other person wants to know you, it's pretty easy for them to buy into a conversation with you and the rest be history. Hope this helped :)

Answer 3

Just be yourself and honest. Say what you just said in your question. People appreciate honest and confident people. You have nothing to lose by going up to someone and saying hi and introducing yourself.

Answer 4

I usually observe first. When I kinda get what they're into and what there interests are, I'd try to start a converstaion about that. Don't pretend to know about a certain subject if you don't, and don't pretend to be interested if you aren't. Be a good listener at first, people like to talk about themselves a lot.

Answer 5

Well I take it your a woman. It is so easy for you, just go to a public place and put on your best innocent flirt face and let all the guys come to running you. You know us guys are not hard to attract. Good luck

Answer 6

don know
try some volunteer work at hospitals, youth centers, senior centers, charities, etc...
go deliver food to seniors or help out at the local churches, fundraising, manning phones, etc...
bars are where idle people hang

Answer 7

yup go to a nice bar... get a couple drinks in u to calm ur nervs and say hi! i just moved around here this is a nice place.... then they should say oh really where u from?? then run with it!!!

Answer 8

I know it's a strain. Go work out and ask for some weight help.

Answer 9

If you live in a building, knock on your neighbors' doors and invite them to a dinner party.

Answer 10

It depends on the type of person.Just act natural.Never le them know that your are desperate.