Okay, so my sister is getting married in July and I have been asked to be the maid of honor. I'm very excited! I also am married. Yeah I know being jealous in any relationship is never a good thing, but both my husband and I are on the jealous side. As most weddings go, the bridesmaid's walk down in arm with the groomsmen... and that is how my sister's wedding is going to be...however, the man I will be walking with is nearly 30 years older than me, and is also married. Though, my husband still is having a problem with this...to the point that he doesn't even want to go. The way he sees it is that I am buying a fancy dress to walk in arm with another man. It would mean alot to me to have him there too... But I feel now that if he goes he's going to ruin it all by being upset about it, and then it's going to make me in a bad mood... but if I don't go, then I'd be missing out on my sister's wedding... what should I do?!
2007-02-26 11:42:34 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am not planning on not going...I guess my question was more or less what to do about my husband and if I was just being stubborn. I am not going to miss out on her wedding... but this just really kinda shows me how rocky my own marriage really is...just wanted opinions.
2007-02-26 11:58:20 · update #1
tell your husband that you are not marying the dang guy, and its your sisters wedding, and thats how weddings are supposed to be, you are suppoes towalk down withsomeone you are not married to or going out, so he needs to chilax(relax)
2007-02-26 11:47:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, since you're married, you're the matron of honor. Your husband should understand that you love him very much and that the day isn't about him or you, but about your sister. Just tell him that you're excited and you two can dance afterwards and I'm sure someone is taking pictures, so you can do a family picture with you, your husband, your siblings, and all of your siblings' spouses. Also, ask your sister to include your husband in part of the wedding day, such as an usher. That way he can get dressed up in a nice tux or something (or to match the groomsmen and he'll also be in the pictures).
I hope this helps! Your husband needs to know that you love him, not some guy who is much older and is also married.
2007-02-26 19:48:10 · answer #2 · answered by Julia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, you should be speaking with your husband. How can he put you in a position to consider not attneding your sisters wedding. Your husband sounds a little childish. Yes, it may not be ideal to walk down with someone other that your husband, but your sister chose you because she wanted to be her maid of honor. And this other guy was chosen for the same reason, he is very important person to the groom. I don't see how you have another option. You should attend your sisters wedding and you should be her maid of honor. Your husband can choose to be an adult and deal with you WALKING with another man, or he can stay at home. If he chooses the latter, you shouldn't get upset at the wedding, but address this shildish bevaviourwith your husband at a later date. If you tell everyone the real reason why he is not there, because he can't deal with you walking with another man, then he would be the one to be embarrased.
Just my opinio.If you miss your sisters wedding because of someone elses immaturity, I think you will be more upset at your self than anyone else.
2007-02-26 19:53:44 · answer #3 · answered by godinfan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK. Look, tell your husband it's your sister's wedding and all you have to do is walk in with this other married guy, whose wife is probably not thrilled either. But you don't have to spend the day with him, just walking down an aisle. I'm sorry, but I don't understand why jealousy has to come into play over this...it's not like you have to go out on a romantic date and then consummate the match later. It's not your wedding...I'd tell my husband to not go if it is that big of a deal, but that I'm not missing my sister's wedding because he isn't secure with the marriage! My husband's sister in law walked down the aisle with my brother at our wedding and her husband didn't mind at all.
2007-02-26 19:49:55 · answer #4 · answered by violamom74 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As the maid of honor (matron of honor if you're married) you should not be walking down the aisle with anyone. The best man is already up with the groom and you should walk down the aisle alone, right before the bride. You will however have to dance the first dance with the best man but thats it.
Tell your hubby to grow up....this is for your sisters wedding and that's it. If the shoe was on the other foot and he had to walk with another woman at his sisters wedding would you ruin the day for them by not going??!!
2007-02-26 19:46:59 · answer #5 · answered by pamomof4 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is a stupid jerk. And you are an idiot for even THINKING of not taking part in your sister's wedding due to his behavior.
Sorry to be so blunt - but you said yourself that yu KNOW that jealousy is not a good thing. And in this case - it is ABSOLUTELY ridiculous!
And just for the record - you are the MATRON of honor - not the "maid". Maids are not married.
If you can talk to your husband - tell him that you will be having dancing with him - and GOING HOME with him. And more than likely - there will be a program that shows you as MATRON of honor - so everybody will know that you are MARRIED.
It's your sister's special day. I can't believe she's even involving you and your husband if you are so ignorant, unreasonable and stubborn.
What should you do??? GROW UP!!! AND TELL YOUR HUSBAND TO GROW UP TOO!!!!!
2007-02-26 19:52:56 · answer #6 · answered by liddabet 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How childish, just go. It is your sister's wedding. This day is about your sister not your husband and his insecurities. You are just walking arm and arm down a short aisle. Maybe for the dance you can suggest to your sister to have the wedding party dance with their husbands/wives/boyfriends/girlfriends to make it more comfortable so you don't have to dance with a stranger but that is up to your sister how she wants to run HER special day.
2007-02-26 19:50:20 · answer #7 · answered by JUDY T 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to be honest, i dont understand why he has such a problem with it. the bottom line is that it is your sister's wedding and she can plan it out anyway she sees fit. if she wants to pair you with someone other than your husband what does it really matter? youre only going to be with him when you walk down the isle. the rest of the night you can be with your husband. is this a matter where your husband doesnt trust you? i think that a relationship should be based on trust and if your husband and you get jealous over petty things like this, is your relationship that great?
2007-02-26 19:47:09 · answer #8 · answered by jechica4 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should go to the wedding, be the Matron of Honor, walk down the aisle with whomever they choose for you to walk down the aisle with and you will smile and be so happy for your sister. Your husband is an immature spoiled jealous brat.....let him feel however he wants to feel; this is your sister's wedding....if he decides to be in a bad mood let him; but you must choose to be in a great mood, celebrating your sister's nuptials......you are married to an idiot
2007-02-26 21:09:20 · answer #9 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a guy and your husband's an idiot. If my wife would look stunning at her sister's wedding, I would be there to take pictures. Of course, this doesn't help you any because he does not care what I think. Ask your sister to talk to him and as a last resort, ask him to be the groomsman who walks you down. I still think he is being overbearing and over-protective.
2007-02-26 19:49:20 · answer #10 · answered by jax0817 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same thing happened at my wedding! My cousins husband didnt want her walking with another man for a total of about 1.5 minutes. I told them (her and her husband) that I really wanted her as my maid of honor and that if he didnt like it he was welcome to come to the receptionand skip the ceremony but he was not welcome at all if he was going to have a bad attitude and ruin MY day...after all the day was all about me..oh yea my hubby too. Then I told my cousin it was her decision and if it was going to ruin her marriage then I could leave her out of the wedding but I was not going to have someone messing up my day. So I guess its up to you and your sis but I think you should go and leave hubby at home or tell him to get over it and promise that you wont leave his side the rest of the night.
2007-02-26 19:50:29 · answer #11 · answered by chantakg 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋