i cheated on my husband 2 months ago and he stayed with me i dont talk to the other guy ant more and me and my husband said we was going to work threw this but he keep throwing the other guy in my face everytime we argue and im tired of going back and forth with this i know i messed up but if he is going to stay with me why do he keep fighting with me about it not to mention after i cheated he started talikig to at least five girls but he say its not cheating.
2007-02-26 11:33:26 · 14 answers · asked by mrsp27 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
tell him to grow up. what happen happen no biggie. tell him to cheat once and ur even
2007-02-26 11:40:47 · answer #1 · answered by lisaanndubay 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
First of all, if he keeps throwing this guy up in your face, he never really forgave you. See the trust is messed up. It takes alot to get over things. Especially things like that. But two wrongs don't make a right. A marriage is just two people. So him talking to another women or just even five is wrong also. It does not make things right for him.
2007-02-26 20:25:18 · answer #2 · answered by tendertouch1117 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hes only throwing it in your face to make you feel bad or for some reason make you see what you did to him, the other girls he claimed is not cheating is some kind of way guys get back at us for wrong doing but he choose to stay and work it out so let him know that things happen and if he didnt feel that way you two would not still be married.
2007-02-26 19:50:39 · answer #3 · answered by tasmania962 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he doesn't appear to have forgiven u, even if he promised to work on it, doesn't mean he will ever be able to forget it. he may have thought he could get past it but than whenever there is any disagreement the subject turns to the cheating thing. have u gotten therapy? he may now think it just wasn't worth it to work on it, back than he was in this competition with the other man, now he knows he isn't so he can behave like this. because of what happened he may not really see u the same way as he use to. sometimes when there is betrayal in a marriage i think it is often best to just get out of it, so the cheater doesn't have to have it thrown in her face, and the cheated one can get past it.
2007-02-26 19:48:00 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off...you did the crime, now you got to do the time. If it were reversed, you wouldn't just be over it just like that because he is sorry...He is venting and that is his right. Now. It is not right for him to do the same thing you did just to piss you off and for pay back. That is not the way to work past this. I think you should ask him to do couples therapy. You need a third party to filter through all the BS and get to the root problem. Know this. It will not be easy and the man will be pissed off for a while. Just deal with it. You messed up, this is the price to work things out in your marriage. Good Luck
2007-02-26 19:41:18 · answer #5 · answered by You Don't Know Me! 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well since he did agree to try again he should be trying to fight the urge to "throw it in your face" all the time however it HAS only been 2 months. Thats not such a long time - the wound for him is probably still very raw and very painful. Ultimately it was your wrongdoing so maybe you just need to give him more time? Sounds like he's trying to hurt you cause you hurt him... its a natural reaction.
2007-02-26 19:45:59 · answer #6 · answered by Smiley One 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He stays with you because he loves you his love was real from the beginning He fights with you because hes hurting inside Hes talking to the other girls that doesn't mean he sleeping with them its allot harder for guys to get laid then woman that's why that guy laid a married woman because you was easy
I hate to say this but if you love him get him laid just so that the odds are even and he doesn't feel so inferior to you . It would be a start then you can forgive each other instead of one person doing all the forgiving
2007-02-26 19:57:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
AFTER you cheated he started TALKING to a few girls, the operating word is AFTER, and yes, it hurts to get cheated on, you probably still don't know the effect of your actions since you try to dismiss your behaviour so coldly, i wonder if the roles were reversed how many years would you hang his infidelity over his head
have you even begun to try and earn his trust back?
2007-02-26 20:31:43 · answer #8 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you just expect for him to forget about it overnight??? Throwing it up in your face is by far not as worse as what you did, you guys need to go to a marriage counselor and get some help.
2007-02-26 19:44:29 · answer #9 · answered by sweetpea22306 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems he is trying to really get to you like you did to him....cheating in a marriage is really hard to forget let alone forgive...that will take a lot of time to heal....but one has to forgive in order for it to work and apparently he's not ready to forgive....best advice is to try and talk to him let him know that you are trying and want things to really work but he has to try too...if he doesn't want to try and let it go then its a losing battle...you can either deal with it or get out!
2007-02-26 19:41:37 · answer #10 · answered by Kickin' Back 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋