How do I deal with this?

Question

My bestest friend and I got into a fight this weekend.Seriously it was so stupid. I already was having a bad day so when I go to her house for girl night, i just left it all behind. Well she is like 20 pounds soak and wet and a lot tiner than me, im not big, im just bigger than her. She is always jumping on people and thats what she did to me that night. It started off as playing but then she like pulled my hair so I punched her like 10 times and we were both fighting for real. It was crazy. After the fight she claimed I was wrong bc she is smaller so I shouldnt hit her, but then she like started to scream all this stuff IU trusted her with. She knows my life is not the best and she told everyone who was there what I been through. Then she had the nerve to call my mother and yell at her for being the person she is and how wrong she is. I dont know where half of this came from but I have been the bestest friend to her and trust her more than anyhting. Everyone already knows what happend

Answer 1

maybe u should talk to her and tell her that what happened hurt u. she had no right to share your very private things with others. maybe she isn't as good of a friend as u thought. she should not have jumped on u if she didn't want u to react to it and try and protect yourself. think u thought u knew this person and maybe u didn't really know her. life is one big lesson, and we always seem to be learning lessons about life. u shared to much with her, and when she betrayed your confidence it hurt u. best maybe to distance yourself from her for awhile, if the talk doesn't help things.

Answer 2

I really think that the answer is time and forgiveness. I think it's gonna take a little bit for her to cool down from the fight you two had and if you really want to have the closeness of the previous relationship the two of you shared, you will need to forgive her for telling everyone the things you trusted her with. The best tool for fixing relationships that have gone awry is talking about it. You should wait at least a day or two after this happened, then call her and say you really want to talk about everything that has happened and that you literally feel sick about not being her friend anymore, or at least not as close of a friend. Admit you both made mistakes and it's time that you share the friendship once again that you both know can work.

Answer 3

It sounds like your bestest friend was not worth having for an enemy! Consider yourself well rid of her. Move on and try to explain to your mother that you took your friend into your confidence, only to vent feelings, but she betrayed that confidence in the worse way. Your mother will understand.
Try to mend things at home. In the future play your emotions closer to your vest (in other words, don't reveal things to people that you would be afraid they would repeat.)
If you need a confidant, make sure it is someone that you have established a very long relationship with and that they understand that you would take a betrayal of confidence very seriously.
Your ex bestest friend sounds emotionally unstable. Learn from this experience. Know that things always have a way of working themselves out and this is not the end of the world. Don't be embarassed by what she revealed to the others at the party. Had I been there I would have been appalled at your friend, not the information she blurted out in anger. Sensible people would not hold it against you.

Answer 4

It goes both ways. When she jumped on you, you should've told her to get off. It doesn't mean you have to punch her numerous times, but with you having a bad day already, I can understand your frustration. Just because the two of you got into a fight, doesn't mean she should bring your mother into this OR other friends of hers. Telling other people about your personal life is rude, and it's going way too far for how silly the situation is. She sounds immature and like she needs to grow up. If you've been a good friend to her and she's disrespecting you, then I'd just let it go. The friendship obviously didn't mean a lot to her, and she had to ruin it. Good luck!

Answer 5

sounds to me like as stupid as the cause of the fight might have been, the fact that she abused your trust reveals something about her that is oh-not-so-good. i mean, she used the situation and immediately betrayed you. thats not a thing of friends. maybe its time to re-think the friendship? she was your best friend when you werent fighting and she seemed trustworthy but what about now? im to believe that a fight between two friends reveals the good and darkest side of a person. and lets you know if they are a true friend. i have to realize that keeping secrets really isnt that hard. especially if it makes you share a special bond with someone else. the fact that she kept your stuff under wraps until she deemed necessary, doesnt mean she's a good friend. but well this is the way that i think, it really is up to you to decide if you want to do. im just giving you stuff to consider. hope you make the right decision.

Answer 6

Big lesson learned, in future, do not tell people all of your secrets.
For now, just keep your mouth shut, and go on about your own business. Tell your mother that you are sorry she was called, but it wasn't you that called. This former friend is not to ever be trusted again. Best to avoid her, and stay to yourself for awhile, and then make a few new friends. Never give anybody that much power over you again. Best wishes

Answer 7

I'm not sure what to say. i've had fights with my bff's too. You should probably talk to her about it. Invite over or on a walk and have a heart2heart with her. I've also had some friends tell stuff that I trusted them with. So you're not alone. The thing is, I knew stuff about them also. So it's kinda a i tell you, you tell me thing. So you have something to fight back with. Although, it's better not to fight at all! But as far as advice goes, that's all I got. Good Luck with your friend!

Answer 8

That doesn't sound like a best friend. That sounds like someone who just likes to make themselves feel better by having someone around them who they think they are better than. Don't be surprised if most of the people there didn't already know your problems from personal conversations with your "best friend".

Friendship is not proven through periods of peace, friendship is proven through periods of war.

Don't speak to her anymore, if she comes back and apologizes then she is friend material, if not, she is just someone with such a large ego and small confidence level that you won't want to associate with them anyway. You are not in the wrong here.

Answer 9

That's rough. And I think that you need to confront her...be very calm (no fighting, lol)...and try to talk it out with her. If she doesn't listen to you...bring a friend with you and go back again. If she still won't listen...go to someone more important like her parents and bring them with you. And if she still doesn't listen, treat her like you would a tax collector. Talk it out and try to see what's really going on. You tell her your thoughts and she'll say hers...that way you two can think of a compromise.

-online advice column-

p.s. just find a way to contact me and let me know what's up. i can give you any kind of advice that you need!

Answer 10

wow shes not a friend at all to you...i had a friend like that and we bacame friends agian bc i talked to her about and said sry and she also said sry tell her how you feel and if shes a real friend she'll say sry too