Fiance going to massage school, Jealousies justified?

Question

My fiance is in school for massage therapy.

I find myself jealous that she is seeing all these naked men. Many of which (she told me) get erections during the massages. A few times the towels have slipped off the side of the table (because of improper draping technique, she is still very new) and exposed the erection.
She accidently touched a man's penis once while doing his inner thigh.

I am jealous but she says I am over reacting and all this is normal and other students have had simular experiences.

Am I over reacting? Is this normal?

Answer 1

LOL I'm glad some one else is dealing with the same thing. My boyfriend (nearly fiance) in college went through massage therapy school and I was jealous as well. It helped me to go to his school. They have to get 100 hours (or at least here they do) in order to graduate so they end up needing all their friends to help them get enough hours to graduate. I went a couple times and there was NO one in there to be jealous of. The average person getting a massage is in their 40s. They are overweight (not grossly but usually by 20 lbs) and trying to recapture their youth.

For the therapist, it's just a job and a hard job at that. It's a turn on for the person getting a massage of course but not for the therapist. By the end of 3 massages in a row, she will be worn out. Thats not sexy. When I talked to them they all compared it to hauling boxes up a flight of stairs for 3 hours. You aren't thinking erotic thoughts, you are thinking about going home and taking a shower. Then of course the worst part for my boyfriend was feet. He seriously hated massaging feet--even if you showered that morning, do your feet smell that great after being in the shoes and walking around all day? So while I'm sure the women loved getting their foot massage, he worked hard not looking disgusted when he did it.

I agree with you that you don't want her seeing other guys erect but I doubt she wanted to see that either! It's perfectly normal to be a lil jealous but think about it--would your feelings be different if she was a doctor or surgeon? She'll need support after a physically demanding day. Just let it go and don't let it come between you two.

Answer 2

I think it's normal. I don't know if I could date a massage therapist. While they may say it is just part of the job, they will be comparing your personality to every guy that comes in there, subconsciously. They also will be worn out at the end of the day, and I have heard spouses of massage therapists actually get very little action at home - contrary to popular opinion. Your spouse may try as hard as possible to block the image of certain men in her mind, and a body does become a body at some point, but does a personality just become a personality? It is true, on the other hand, that most massage patients are older and overweight, from what I have seen. If you are going to date a massage therapist, don't ask questions or strive to know more about it, or you will drive yourself nuts.