Wondering if I am the only one who is experiencing this?
2007-02-26 07:47:48 · 10 answers · asked by ? 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Hate to say it, but yes. It's completely common for friendships of any kind to begin to fray after one gets married. Not because your friend doesn't like you anymore, but simply because their life is different. Spouse must come first with secrets, energy, affection, and time. It is much harder to maintain friendships once someone is married because that requires more effort than before. The best thing you can do to seal the friendship is be understanding, be supportive, and be available. Make certain you work hard to be friends with the new spouse, as well. It may be frustrating for you to make all the effort to keep in touch, but if the friendship is worthwhile, you may have to.
2007-02-26 07:55:02 · answer #1 · answered by heel75 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, alas, it is. I had a good friend who I talked with all the time, we met for dinner once a month, etc. But when he got married, we spoke less and less, and now it is only about every six months we "catch up." At first I was hurt and perplexed, but I realized his wife may not be too comfortable with a close female friend (which sucks, but that's the way some women are), more importantly, this guy needs to concentrate on his marriage. Friendships naturally fall a little to the wayside when one of the friends gets involved in any relationship, but the big "M" - watch out!! I truly love this guy, so I am willing to sacrifice our daily contact for the sake of him having a happy marriage, and I know this guy would be there if I ever really needed him. So after the adjustment period, I'm content to "catch up" and know that we are in each others hearts. Of course, this is my particular story, all relationships differ in degrees. I hope you get more than every 6 months, but...you have to step back a little until Wife is either more confident with you as Hubby's friend, or Hubby misses you too much! I hope this helps you out some (BTW if you used to be more than "friends" EVER and Wife knows about it, fuggedaboutit)!!!!
2007-02-26 15:59:36 · answer #2 · answered by I See You 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, yes this happens. It doesn't happen all the time as many friendships are very strong but it is one of those "most of the time" things. When a guy gets married, he is pledging his life to that one woman and her alone. Not only that but married couples have a lot of responsibilities to deal with. Not to mention, the way marriages last these days, the wife may not be too comfortable with the friendship. I'm not saying she may not like you, or not trust you, or be jealous of your relationship with her husband or anything like that, but he is her husband. The husband puts his wife before all others and vice versa. I'm sure he still thinks of you as a dear friend and likes to talk to you and if his wife doesn't like the fact that the two of you talk then she never should have married him if they couldn't agree on each other's friendships.
2007-02-26 16:17:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes
2007-02-26 15:51:03 · answer #4 · answered by WC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes its common he has a wife to focus on now
2007-02-26 15:57:45 · answer #5 · answered by smilingontime 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Naw, it is quite common..happens a lot of the times. just be more understanding.
2007-02-26 15:50:43 · answer #6 · answered by Nick 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,unfortunatly it does happen alot. The new him/her in their life may see you as a threat.
2007-02-26 15:53:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep.
2007-02-26 16:10:11 · answer #8 · answered by MagPie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it does happen.
2007-02-26 15:51:33 · answer #9 · answered by Shortstuff13 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ya i hate to say it is normal... but it sucks
2007-02-26 15:50:37 · answer #10 · answered by laydenirvine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋