I am going through divorce. Can anybody give me advice on this subject?

Answer 1

Talk to a divorce attorney. Don't trust anyone else's advice.

Answer 2

Divorce sucks and it will be hard don't give up.

What advise do you need?

Start By doing a Financial Statement, write down all assets and all liabilities. Type out, or make a spread sheet. Divide the assets fairly and equitably. Divide the debts fairly and according to who gets the benefit of the debt. Be fair but be firm make your numbers so the would hold up in court. Remove your emotions from stuff.

Talk to an attorney but you need to be in the drivers seat and know what you think is fair.

Get some counseling to over come the divorce. Gather family and friends around for comfort and trust no one but very close friends or siblings and parents.

Best of luck.

Answer 3

What kind of advice? Legal? Spiritual? Raising children of divorce?

Open your eyes, with the divorce rate at 51% in this country, odds are good that you know several people that have been through it and can help you find advice on whatever issue concerns you.

Since we don't know what stage of divorce you're in, or the cause, or whether or not you have children, you aren't going to find answers here.

Answer 4

everyone's divorce is different because we are all different. if you have children, your custody agreement and visitation schedule may be difficult to work out. it is likely that the party that does not take the children will pay out about 28% of his/her gross monthly income as child support. if it will be you, NEVER get into arrears paying! you can ever be denied certain types of employment if you owe back child care payments.

again, in reference to kids: it's terrible these days how one or the other or both the adults move around and keep the children from the other parent/grandparents! it is not the kids' fault that the two of you can't get along. the benefits of each parent's love, as well as all of the relatives, is good for the CHILD. unless a parent is a molester or will neglect or abuse the child, then there is no reason for the other parent to remove visitation! and then:

if i lived inside of you, i would call the closest bar association, or ask friends for the referral of a truly good family law lawyer. the one that i would get is the person that i am fortunate to know, who has written the family law journal for the entire state for 30 years. i don't know if you can find such a lawyer.

in reference to settlements of any sort: you should be like the vidal sassoons of famous hair salons and shampoo products all over the world. they are multi millionaires. they knew, and i know, that lawyers will eat up every last penny that you have to fight your battles for you. the sassons wanted to avoid paying lawyers for an agreement that they knew that they would both end up settling for at divorce, so therefore, all they did was each sit down, draw up what they each wanted, had a meeting, discussed the items, then made a conclusion over who got what when (which of course can also apply to a child custody argument or visitation, since you should be adults by now). they then handed their signed (by both) agreements to their attorneys and told them to simply write them up to present to the court.

they ended up each getting what they wanted or agreed to, they got a fair and equitable divorce, they weren't screwed by the lawyers, and they parted in peace. why not do that for yourselves?

Answer 5

Attorney, one who specialize3s in divorce. I speak from experience. I'm 58 and have been married twice, each time for 10 years. 1st left for another man, but I didn't know that until late in the game. Fortunately, I got a lawyer JUST in time to prevent her taking almost everything AND half my paycheck (I was in the military at the time and 50% of my pay was considered reasonable since I could live on board.). The 2nd wife just left dcided to leave one day, and we split things ourselves, but we still had lawyers on each side to be sure things were fairly divided. Last words, when dividing things, community property, be fair, avoid spite. And another things, any personal property you had before marriage is NOT community property, which is why my 2nd wife couldn't take my retirement savings which I had before we married. All she could get was 1/2 of the interest earned, after taxes, for the time while we were married, not half the whole balance, like she thought. Lucky me. She also thought she would get half the house value. What she was really entitled to was half the equity gained, which at the time amounted to about $7K, but then she owed me half the child support a previous ex-husband neglected to pay which came to almost $10K she owed me!, I let her pff on the child support and she let me off on the equity and I kept the house and assumed the rest of the debt (mortgage) on myself. Debts divide just like assets when it comes to community property.. I would never have known about these things had I not had an attorney to advise me on assets, separate and community property, and everything.

Answer 6

Read, "The proper care and feeding of marriage". I know it sounds like advice that is coming a little late, but it might help you come to terms with mistakes you made in the marriage.

Too often, we focus on the other person and what they did to us, how they didn't meet our needs. I know that in my divorce, I was focused, some might say obsessed with how my ex had hurt me. When I read "the proper care and feeding of husbands" I realized how I had neglected him, and where I was sorely lacking as a wife.

It's not easy to accept, but in the long run, it might help you heal emotionally....not to mention, it might help you in future relationships.

Get sound legal advice, and keep your support system close to you, but don't linger on the past. Look toward the future.

Good luck to you.

Answer 7

Get an attorney. Try not to make the divorce more painful than it already is. Try to avoid conflict with your spouse.

Answer 8

Be prepared to question every decision you ever made. You'll have to learn to trust yourself again.