What should happen next in my story?

Question

Hey all, I'm a bit short of inspiration. ^^;

My heroine has a friend who is the son of a mafia family. She heads over to his house for the first time to hang out after school. Three of her very silly friends, two of whom have a crush on her, end up following discreetly to make sure she's okay. She discovers that they followed, being a perceptive girl. She doesn't want her mafia-born buddy to realize they're there, though. The three of them are currently sitting under the kitchen window, listening in on conversation. Mafia Guy is just about to leave the room to check on his brother, who is sick, in the other room. That should give Heroine enough time to get over to the window and convince her friends to go home before Mafia Guy discovers them and the whole afternoon is ruined.
What happens next?
And PLEASE, nothing violent. I'd like to keep this part of the story light.
Any ideas?

Oooh, nice one. Does he ever find out that her friends are there, or does the evening end peacefully?

"How can you keep the story light when you're afraid for your friends' safety?"
^ Good point, but she's not really worried for their safety. She know Mafia Guy is perfectly easy-going and none of the other men will hurt her friends without his go-ahead. It's more like she wants to hang out in peace without embarrassing Mafia Guy, herself, or even her friends(even though she thinks they're idiots).
Also, tension is fine. I just don't want any bloodshed. That's what I meant by "light".

devilish, you sure dreamed up an elaborate twist there! I might not use the character you've described, but I do think it'd be a good idea to have them discovered by someone else. =)
Thanks so much for the ideas, everyone! Keep 'em coming!

Answer 1

Do they have a swimming pool? They could push someone in...

Answer 2

Introduce another character to the story.

I once knew this one guy when I was growing up. His nickname literally was the "Godfather." He was an old guy. And if you met him for the first time, especially if you were young, like I was then, you'd probably have been pretty scared. He had this short grey and black hair that was a buzz cut. He had tattoos all over his arms and chest of ladies and other things and his face and appearance looked very weathered. He looked like some old man that could have come from the inner circles of some Sicilian mob. The funny thing is that he was the nicest guy in the world to kids, but for adults it was a either he liked you or he didn't kind of thing. One thing was for certain, everybody that knew him had a very memorable story they could tell about him.

My thinking is have the grandfather or dad discover the friends on the property. The friends will be totally frightened by the looks of the old man, but he turns out to be this really nice guy towards them. However you can play the old man as a good old man or bad old man that is just nice to kids later in the story. The old man could be used for a twist and to add some mystery into the story. It also helps make the story more complex and helps ensure that your main characters don't get developed too early by making the boyfriend out to be good or bad or knowing too much too soon. It leaves some mystery. What will the grandfather tell his grandson. Will he tell him at all? Will he tell him everything? Will he keep him in the dark and only feed him info that he wants to feed him? To me, having another character discover them makes the story a lot more interesting than the boyfriend overhearing or discovering them.

Answer 3

ok.. here a suggestion u could use...

when mafia guy goes to check on his bro and ur heroine goes to her friends near the window to convince them to leave and dont ruin her day. the idiot frnds of ur heroine dont understand this and insist on staying there untill she returns back to her home safely. while she's talking to them in a very low voice, the mafia guy returns and sees the girl near the kitchen window.. he cant see her but he can hear that she's murmerring something cuz she's standing with her back to the mafia guy. she quickly realizes that her bf has come back. she turns back, smiles to him and says.. "the weather is very nice .. i was just humming .. " then the mafia guy asks her to go out with him for movie and some fun ... she quickly agrees to him (thinking that this way.. her idiot frnds might not follow her and they'll surely return to their homes.) the girl and the mafia guy head for the front door and within no time.. they'r on his new harley davidson and on their way to have fun. her three idiot frnds dont get the time to follow her .. so they head back to their homes with disappointment.. and without discovered by anyone.. becauze they went the same way they came .. through the bushes ...

how's that?

Answer 4

Don't mafia guys usually have big dogs roaming the yard freely. Perhaps both of them look up slowly to see a couple big dogs looking at them. Telltale muffin, I know the heart story, but what is muffin? And if you like good stories your definitely like the movie " Stranger than Fiction" He's not crazy. He's just written that way. starring Will Farrell, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Dustin Hoffman, Queen Latifah, and Emma Thompson. www.sonypictures.com

Answer 5

How can you keep the story light when you're afraid for your friends' safety?

Answer 6

then the mafia guy asks who she is talking to. she says "nobody". he's like nobody eh? then he goes over to the window suspensefully but no one is there. he looks at her inquisitively. she smiles nervously. they get back to watevr they were doing...

Answer 7

He should come and grab her. He asks them wat they heard and they look at each other and say they were just walkin by and didnt even see any 1 home.