Bad friend???

Question

Me and my husband have been friends with another couple for the last 2 years, It seems like we were inseperable. My husband & I had a baby back in 2005 not 4 months later she was pregnant and I had no problem at all with it. But right after she had the baby they started not coming around as much and not calling. I realize that having a baby leaves you with little freedom, but they have never been the type to call to see how things are going, My husband and I have always been the ones to do that. Finally I got sick of always having to be the one to call so I told myself that I was going to see how long it would take them to call, finally I called 2 months later after not hearing one word from them & everything seemed fine, she used the usual I have just been busy excuse. It has been 5 months since we have talked to them. Should I say the hell with it and go on with my life or should I call and see the reason why it seems they are blowing us off. I am kinda fed up with the whole thi

I don't want this to sound childish, Friends are important to me. So don't think that I am just being a brat

Answer 1

I would just call ONE MORE TIME and then tell them, "I know its been awhile but we both miss you two and want to see the little baby as well! come on over and lets hang out!" if she says no then just be like, "well you have to remember to CALL ME....just frickin call me later. and please actually do it"

Answer 2

I can see it from both sides..

When my husband and I had our son back in 2002, things were very hectic for a while. But at the same time, the close friends we had, we still saw/talked to on a regular basis. They came over and saw us, often times just to swing by and see how our son was doing. This went on throughout our entire friendship (we're no longer friends, due to many reasons.. none involving the issues you are dealing with). Not only with the two friends of ours who would always come over.. we often had plenty of time to spend with our other friends and everything. So, I know for a fact that it can be done. So, whenever a new Mom uses the "I've been so busy" thing as an excuse, for not calling over months of time.. that's just a little much.

I also know how it is, to be exhausted from taking care of the baby, and then have friends who don't understand that your life is now about more than just "hanging out" with friends. Sometimes it can be very insulting whenever friends take it personally if you don't make time for them, in your busy schedule.. But that phase (to me) should mainly be during that intial time of getting used to the new routine and all. It shouldn't carry on as the child gets older. Cause while it is very important to take care of your child, and put them first.. you definately have time to do other things after a while, once everything is settled down around the house.

So yeah, I totally see how you can be frustrated with the issue. Maybe your friend just hasn't quite gotten into her "groove" with being a new Mom. It can take a while, it's not an overnight thing (as you probably already know). If you really want to keep the friendship, just try to take the initiative, and see if she wants to get together for "girl time" or whatever. It would be good for both of you.

Best of luck!

Answer 3

well u should let them get settled with the baby so dont get mad at them. but how about you call them and tell them to find a baby sitter and you guys find a baby sitter and then how bout u guys go on a double date to catch up

Answer 4

HAVING A NEW BABY IN YOUR LIFE IS RE-ADJUSTABLE AND MAYBE SHE IS EXHAUSTED.GIVE IT TIME THEY WILL COME AROUND.