WHAT'S YOUR OPINION? How prevalent that soldiers "scratch the itch" when they are away from their wives/girlfriends for an extended time? I've heard from some veterans that though some soldiers 'step out' on their girlfriends/wives but they still are devoted to them...they considered the fling as 'nothing' and just 'meeting their needs' Is this true?
2007-02-26 04:12:15 · 9 answers · asked by AILENE 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
ok, it's seems the general consensus is that it's prevalent ...however, what about the second part of question do many soldiers consider it 'no big deal' and no reflection of any lack of devotion to their mate? Do they really expect their mate to understand? AGAIN, TRY NOT TO MORALIZED...TOO MUCH!!!
2007-02-26 05:07:23 · update #1
It may happen, but it is an insult to their marriage vows and disrespectful to their spouse. And the result of "meeting their needs" may be HIV/AIDS, an STD (or several STDs), or a child born as a result of the "fling." This is irresponsible behavior at its worse.
2007-02-26 04:15:51 · answer #1 · answered by kja63 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well my husband is military and he was away from me for 6 months. He was only on the other side of the U.S. not overseas so he was able to call me. He called all the time because he couldn't believe how much cheating was going on with the other soldiers. He said they too thought it was no big deal and that they have needs and their wives were too far away. My husband said he called me so much because he wanted me to feel confident that he was not cheating on me. I trust him completely but I can tell you that if he did cheat I wouldn't just say that's okay I know you have needs. I have needs too but I only plan to have them with him. Anyways, throughout military life in only the last two years I have met many people and I did meet one woman that told me her husband has girlfriends when he is away and she has boyfriends and then when they are together they tell each other about their other relationships. Her opinion was life is too short and the amount of time they are apart can be miserable without someone to mess around with. At least they know what the other is doing, but really how on earth could any military wife be possitive that their husband is not cheating because really how would we ever find out if it happens so far away. Of course this is true even outside the military that some people think that sex is just sex and that they can have sex with anyone and only one one person. I don't agree but hey live and let live. Just as long as my husband doesn't thing he can go "step out" and "scratch the itch."
2007-03-03 15:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by missy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do think that men can have a purely sexual affair that means nothing more than sex. No feelings involved. I also think that we can be in love with a girlfriend or wife and still have these purely sexual meaningless affairs without taking anything away from our spouses.
You don't want morals involved but this question is all about morals. I know that I could have a sexually relationship with my assistant that is nothing more than 2 people rubbing their organs together for mutually physical enjoyment. I do not pursue this relationship because I love and respect my wife and I know that it would not be meaningless to my wife. She would be hurt by my inability to control my animalistic desires.
When I was in the military I did cheat on my girlfriend in every port we stopped at. I did succumb to my desires and enjoyed myself. I know from personally experience and first hand witnessing that I was not alone but not in the majority. Most of the older married men were faithful. I do think that "scathing the itch" is done a lot but not by the majority of MARRIED soldiers.
2007-02-26 12:26:30 · answer #3 · answered by Mike E 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's true that some men, (military or civilian, it doesn't really matter) will cheat when they are away from the spouses for any length of time. They are obviously NOT devoted to their spouses, although I'm sure that they will do the lip service anyway and swear that they are. Vows are hard for ANYONE to keep---male or female. Especially when separated for long periods of time. I'm sorry, but although it is lonely, it's certainly not impossible and for truly devoted and loving couples it's a badge of honor and a tribute to their commitment that they are able to fulfill their marital vows. My husband and I have been separated many times and varying amounts of time. We make a point of NOT putting ourselves into temptations way. It's not really that difficult if you truly love one another and certainly not impossible.
2007-02-26 12:20:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ailene,
Prior military, 8 years active duty, U.S. Navy.
I won't lie to you and tell you that it never happens. I saw it more with younger married guys on their first cruise or deployment. The term 'what goes in port, stays in port' has long been a saying among seagoing Sailors, which has only been recently picked up by the Las Vegas Tourism Board as a catchy promo.
That being said...
I can't speak for everyone, and I'm sure that I'll have ten gazillion Sailors come behind me and tell me what a complete idiot I am...but from my experience, by in large, mature, married guys did not screw around.
As for your addendum...
I cannot, and will not speak for those who did partake said activities. I DO know that some of them were married, though what & how they thought about their commitment/spouses I did not delve into...it's not information that Sailors often "shared" with each other.
2007-02-26 12:21:14 · answer #5 · answered by Wolfsburgh 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL, my friend was married to a guy who was in the army. They lived on base. Now the wives would flip their doormats around to let the soldiers know they were accepting "visitors" so to speak while their husbands were away. So don't just put it on the soldiers.
It comes down to a basic need for the most primal of human instincts, and while away from their partner for too long, anyone is susceptible.
2007-02-26 12:19:30 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tough to answer, sometimes were worried about "Jody" back home, depends on duty station, depends on how solid the relationship is. So, too many factors to consider without more info. But most importantly, trust your man.
Svetlana is wrong, she is generalizing.
2007-02-26 12:16:23 · answer #7 · answered by SEAHAWKS P.O.ED 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If they have time to go and "scratch the itch" and they are truly devoted to their significant other, then they would scratch the itch alone.
2007-02-26 12:21:17 · answer #8 · answered by dardarzene 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
In my experience, miltary men scratch that itch any time they can, whether on active duty or not. Its up to you if that strains the definition of devotion or not.
2007-02-26 12:17:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋