Can I gain enlightenment when I am filled with such anger?

Question

I refuse to let go of my anger. Within me there is a man who is more than willing to act out violently when provoked. I know how I can stop being so angry, it is as simple as stopping, my problem is finding the motivation to let go of the anger. As Ecclesiastes states, “all is vanity”. I have rooted my ego from all of its other hiding places, fear, doubt, worry, yet from this last refuge it has taken, anger, I cannot seem to extract him. He taunts me. “How can you let them get away with that?” “Do you see how close they are tailgating you? If you do not stop this car and take a bat to that driver’s head you are a coward!” This devil so beguiles me. Any words of advice?

Answer 1

I hear you on that. Sometimes you just WANT to be angry it feels too good!

Good question. I think I've discovered that the anger is sort of a proxy for power, I feel powerful when angry and responding to other's idiocy. It takes realizing that
A. You are actually giving up power to those idiots who can "decide" how your day will be.
B. You actually have no REAL desire to have power over the situation and that's a good thing! Imagine if you really got involved every time someone was a jerk on the road or on TV or in a store? You'd never have time for yourself!

Sometimes the great ideas of Buddhism take time to sink in. You may find a year from now that something clicks and it makes more sense. I would say keep reading different books on eastern philosophy, Tibetan buddhism (The book of Living and Dying), Zen, Daoism, etc... And some pearl somewhere may help.

All that said, yes, you can become enlightened while angry, but it's like slaying the tiger with a Swiss army knife instead of a battleaxe.

Answer 2

By letting your anger control you, you are effectively allowing whoever makes you angry control you. Do you wish to be controlled in this way?

Take this power away from them by not letting them make you angry. It's a simple thing. Allow them to hold power over you, or cut off that power. It's all in YOUR head. If they intend to anger you, all you have to do is think: "No. You have no power to control my emotions. I hold that control". If they are not actually intending to anger you, then it is TOTALLY in your own head and can only end by your conscious decision. In today's world disrespect (or what appears as disrespect) is everywhere.

If you can't disconnect what triggers your anger from that which allows your anger, you will one day find yourself in serious legal difficulty - i.e., in jail for felony assault and battery or perhaps even murder. You either give others the control over your anger switch (and lose) or take control of it yourself (and win).

The best way to defeat those who want to provoke your anger, is to not let them do so. Heck, you might make THEM angry in the process. Then you've just taken control over them. It is more than a trite saying that "cooler heads prevail". We all lose our rationality to some degree when we are angry. So, if you want to have reasoning power over someone else, let them get emotional while you stay cool. It's pretty amazing how well it works.

Answer 3

My dear, amazing and loving brother is like that. He's the nicest person in the world until he gets angry (never at us). Eventhough he not "depressed", he was just diagnosed with depression. It seems strange, but depression doesn't have to manifest itself as sadness, it can manifest as anger and rage. If you drink, stop drinking and seek a doctor's advice on taking some very harmless antidepressants. Alcohol (not always, but ususally)seems to go hand in hand with rage and you may need to manage both. I hope you can get rid of it because the stress levels it creates are toxic to the body and soul.

Answer 4

I sometimes have the same problem. It helps me to just go somewhere, and just scream for a while. After tha tI just simply go and talk to the people I might of hurt. If it is my sister, I sit down with her. I first apologize for anything I have done, and then I explain how I feel, and the problems I have with her. It might surprise you how often people are feeling the same way, they just hold it all up inside. I do this frequently, and I now feel soooo much happier. I don't get angry as much, I even look forward to talking with people because it then shows how alike we are!!!

Answer 5

I understand you completely...but to be honest, anger is a great motivator. I never act out violently out of anger, but I feel anger on a regular basis and I kind of enjoy it. The thing is, anger is not the only emotion I feel, I feel all emotions...anger is just as beautiful as the others, no matter what people say. Anger can however complicate things. Sometimes, you need a good dose of apathy to balance things out, because life is easier when you don't care.

Answer 6

I wonder if I should answer this, I answer some of your questions, but no feedback, anyhow, I will comment on it;
about enlightenment, It could be that, It is 'realized' and not 'attained'.
so in essence, we are all, already enlightened, we have only to realize it.
the tree is enlightened, the sea is enlightened, the noble ant is enlightened.
so too you are my friend.

honour your anger. do not forsake yourself.
yet, be cautious

I found a proverb minute ago, odd, well I will now share it with you.

If you are patient in 1 moment of anger you will avoid 100 days of sorrow
-Zen Proverb

Answer 7

I suggest you ask again under PSYCHOLOGY rather than here.

I know this will sound trite. Seek professional help. Barring that see a community counselor of some type or a clergyman. Do it now before you act out on what you're feeling and cause some hurt to someone who is as naive about what it is THEY are doing as you are about your impulse to REACT to it. It will not be easy!! But it must be done for YOUR good, if not for the good of others.

Answer 8

My understanding of anger is that it is coalesced pain. If the anger won't go, perhaps you can find out where your pain lies and deal with that. When anger overtakes pain it is because it is so much easier to take control and take it out on others than to re-experience the hurt. Often suppressed pain needs expression and forgiveness to finds its release.

Answer 9

All you need is anger management and you will be enlighten.

Ephesians 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:

Answer 10

Anger is a response to pain. It can be released. Pain can be released. You need to search for the source of your anger and decide that it isn't who you want to be anymore. You know better. Be better.