theyre at it all the time..always in a bad mood and dont even bother if im around listening.5 years of my life have been spent enduring this.it hasnt been easy.do not know wat to do.all the unpleasantness in the house is getting to me.and im worried its partly my fault i dont do anything to stop it.but then i dont want to take sides either.the fault is both of theirs.and get shouted at by them if i say all this affects me.seriously need help.
2007-02-26 00:35:07 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well ive broached the topic once with them but that led to my mom crying and me trying to be the adult. did i mention they drink quite a bit..but not enough to get physically abusive..so anyway im a bit worried about talking to them about that again.
also when i do talk about it, im told that its a matter between the 2 and im nowhere in this.but how cant it affect me??theyre my goddamned parents arent they????
2007-02-26 01:09:05 · update #1
i know they arent bad people but they suck when theyre together.sorry for ramblng on and on.
2007-02-26 01:16:16 · update #2
Parents fighting can be a very stressful situation....My parents used to fight too...
Then one day i took up Gandhi's Idea..I said i will not eat till they come in terms with each other..and i did not eat for two days just to make the point..
The thing is they must know that their fight is affecting you the most..My friend had the same problem..he went to the school physiologist and told him what was happening.. and asked him not to tell his parents that he contacted him...The physiologist send an school letter bought them and gave them counseling.. they are living happily now...
I guess you are in a bad shape right now...hang in there buddy...And one more thing...whatever you do consult with a wise old man/woman..
And one more thing "ITS NOT YOUR FAULT"...
Words fail me now....I read your updated report now...you must be in very bad... Remember its not your fault ok..and how old are you?? It will be alright...
2007-02-26 01:20:34 · answer #1 · answered by Database 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well id say that getting involved and taking sides is a big no no however u must tell them because this is affecting you just let them know u dont deserve the punishment of listening to them fight and that it shouldnt be a repetitive thing and tell them ur learning alot from them on how to deal with ur spouse in future and advise them to get help atleast for ur sake by the way it happened to me yesterday only that it was a phone fight the first ever i cant begin to imagine how taht feels 5 yrs also pray
2007-02-26 00:41:57 · answer #2 · answered by ladyluck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell me more about how you told them this affects you. Was it you screaming that it's bothering you in the middle of their fight, or was it you writing a letter or talking about it calmly later?
I would try talking with each of them one on one, without the other one there. Try saying "I really need to talk to you, something is hurting me and I need you to listen." Then just say how it makes you feel to hear this all the time, that it's tearing you apart. Ask what you can do to help this not bother you- say you try not to think about it but it isn't working.
I think this approach will help you. And IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT! I was divorced, and it was not my daughter's fault. Asking them if it's your fault they're fighting all the time might help them to realize what they're doing.
Hang in there, honey!
2007-02-26 00:56:52 · answer #3 · answered by Simply_Renee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just have three segments of advice, as I am now an adult child of divorced parents:
1. DON'T EVER FEEL LIKE IT IS YOUR FAULT!
2. DO NOT allow them to put you in the MIDDLE of their nonsense.
3. DO NOT try to solve their problems, they will only get more upset.
2007-02-26 01:29:56 · answer #4 · answered by Reserved 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is not your fault. talk to them. tell them to take the fights somewhere else. you are entitled to peace and quiet. if you talk to them and the fights still get loud, call police. they are disturbing the peace.
2007-02-26 00:54:50 · answer #5 · answered by sinned 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the name of a Judge and write him a letter...he will help you and your parents...it may be the wake up call they need.
2007-02-26 00:42:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋