We have been married for 7 years and the marriage is in disconnect mode. We have very little in common besides competitive sports which leaves very little left to talk about. (He doesn't talk about anything he isn't in to- everything is serious) He is all about work and more work..very little play. It is his personality, that is who he is....So not fun, so not happy. When do you just say, it is over?
2007-02-25 17:43:39 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like you pretty much have made up your mind that the relationship is over. Tell me ... why did you marry him? If things were different, better ... remind him of the way things were and let him know that you need to get back to that place. You may need counseling.
2007-02-25 18:06:10 · answer #1 · answered by Sam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think in your heart you already know it is over, You have ot htink of your kids first and formost. Is this effecting their everyday lives? Are they upset about it all? You need ot have them in the happiest life you can give them. Don't let people fool you in to saying that a child needs both parents living with them. Just because their father is not living with them does not mean they can not be apart of their lives. At leadt this way they can have a happy home and not wonder if daddy is going ot be coming home late or working all the time. Some time apart might even help you, he might even respect yuo al ittle more and want to be there with you.
If your heart says it is over you have ot follow it. You iwlln ot be doing anyone any favors by staying in a marriage you are not happy in, it will only bringy ou and your children down!
I wish you the best of luck and hope all goes well!
2007-02-25 17:49:46 · answer #2 · answered by daisy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on you. If you want it to work, you will probably have to work very hard at getting him involved in your lives (kids and yours). Maybe you should go away and take a break from him and see what it feels like. If you still love him, all the extra work won't matter but if you don't then you will probably turn out resenting him for being who and what he is and that won't be fair for either of you as it will make your lives a living hell.
Probably. The key word.
2007-02-25 17:54:53 · answer #3 · answered by green_baby_dragon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to "say" it, it can heard for miles around. How long will you put up with it is the question?
A lot of self righteous, wanna be Christian woman will turn their nose up at me for this, but this is where one night stands play such vital roles in relationships. If you could go out and get the F#@K of your life, you could probably deal with this creep another couple of years pending your situation is worth it. You may even want to set up a regular ol' booty call every other Thursday night.
However if your situation is not that deep, I suggest you bail out now!
2007-02-25 18:12:49 · answer #4 · answered by dadgonewild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're right, and it is just his personality, he won't change. He may change his behaviors, but his personality won't change. My father is the same way, and has been since the day I was born. He hasn't changed, and I doubt you're husband will.
Coming from your children's perspective, a home like that isn't enjoyable. And, honestly, it is not a horrible thing to have divorced parents, especially when the parents are happier apart. Best of luck to you.
2007-02-25 19:08:56 · answer #5 · answered by Kali J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok you guys really need to sit down and talk with no distraction. Let him no how you feel before you decide it's over. Whatever brought you both together and in marriage, that is what you guys need to focus on and start to rekindle those old flames.
2007-02-25 17:53:48 · answer #6 · answered by K_pink05 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm the academic one in our family with a thirst for knowledge and new adventures. My husband loves to watch sports, anything on tv or read novels in the bathroom. When summer comes, he golfs. It won't change. He is what he is. You can either find other ways to fulfill your life or choose to move on.
2007-02-25 17:55:46 · answer #7 · answered by Lake Lover 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him your marriage deserves a holiday for both of you turn off the phones, turn off television, and do nothing but be his wife ,partner , best friend ,Lover.
And make it a monthly thing and remind him that if he dos'nt like that he might want to talk to an attorney because your getting a divorce.
2007-02-25 17:49:16 · answer #8 · answered by Free-Lance 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him to apply his brainpower towards becoming a good husband and father if he is smart enough. challenge that brain of his to figure out family life. Let him know that he is about to smart himself out of a family if he doesn't change his priorities and his focus.
2007-02-25 17:52:40 · answer #9 · answered by j_mang 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is who he is? So why did you marry him.? There had to be a reason or two. Are them reasons still there
2007-02-25 17:54:35 · answer #10 · answered by ckgene 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋