I need advise please?

Question

I am coming over a depression caused by my ex when he left me 8 months ago. When we were together he was depressed and felt suicidal at times. He wanted me to be there for him and have me to talk to and I did because I cared. Through-out this he would not anwser his phone, tell me he would commit suicide by the end of teh school year, he was a teacher. Eventually he told me had a child w some one night stand before we met, and was ashamed and not ready for being a father. So I helped him, only for him to be emotioanlly stable to leave me and get to know the mother of the child. I understand in a way how things can happen, however..he turned so cold to me, him and this girl made me feel so bad about myself, she called me and told me things he said about me to her that weren't nice. You know, I never did anything to him but help him, we never fought. Its one thing to have feelings for someone else, but why did he have to devalue me. IIronlically I suffered from a deep depression because

really loved him. He is not with her now, but they remain friends. He closed me off and treated me like garbage, when in fact the girl he got pregnant is just that. He also blamed me for them getting together, if I didnt tell him to be a part of the child life??!!!
When we were together he was so compassionate and respectful, he told me he couldnt live w/o me. I am still saddened and it hurts still. I tried to confront him and he told me if I need help to get it from a psychologist. That was horrible, after all I did for him. WE are 29 yrs old, educated. I dont understand. How do I get by knowing he made me feel so horrible and I didnt do anything. He turned from day into night. Apparently he seems to be alive and well now, and I am the one who is suffering. I didn't deserve this. And still I have not heard from him, I only want a genuine apology.

Answer 1

this might be hard for you to accept, but the fact that he is not in your life now is really a blessing for you. I know that you are depressed now, but if you delt with him any longer you would have been more emotionally involved and he would have drug you down even more. You have to learn to let go. If he was meant for you the 2 of you would be together in a healthy fruitful relationship. You helped him and you did the best that you could do...he had a decision to make and he made it to his detriment, not yours. Now is the time for you to start focusing on yourself and getting yourself back to being happy. The right guy will come along, but now is a time for you to reflect and grow.

Answer 2

You are a true person. From what you described you seem geniune and caring. Don't let what he did bring you down. Someone that thinks of suicide has deep emotional problems so you shouldnt take anything he says to heart if its about you. He obviously wasnt in his right mind and in his state how can he judge someone? The guy has major problems and most likely even though you said he got over his depression...I bet you it will surface again. So just try to deal as best you can...its okay to hurt. Just remember you're better off with someone that is stable and would treat you like you want to be treated.

Answer 3

You will never get a genuine apology from a user. He was a selfish individual who obviously made a habit of shirking his responsibilities and trying to manipulate you by threatening suicide 24/7. What ive learned is that relationships do not work when you are trying to mother your partner. Unfortunately people like him, who have major issues, need to seek professional help, you should never waste your time on someone like that ever again. This guy deserves whatever misery life has to offer, simply because he exploits the people that care most, and in turn rewards them for their loyalty by stabbing them in the back. Be glad you are rid of this troll, and learn from this experience.

Answer 4

You have asked this same question at least 300 times. You are obviously clinically depressed and aren't doing anything about it. I responded ages ago and you awarded me 'Best Answer". You need to get your doctor to put you on anti-depressant medication. You are not doing yourself a speck of good: Yahoo will not cure your depression. Chances are that all those good people who told you the same thing were CORRECT. Now that you know what to do - DO IT.

EDIT:
1. "I am the one who is suffering"
In the absence of doing anything to get yourself out of this depressive episode - you are ensuring that you stay in it longer.
2. I didn't deserve this.
So what? It's not about deserving or not deserving: it's about learning to cope with what you do have on your plate. People in pain and suffering from terminal illness: do they deserve it?
3. I only want a genuine apology.
Tough. You won't get one. You can't always have what you want so get over it. Your gears are stuck. Get help so you can MOVE ON...

Answer 5

Girl he played you! He was a jerk the entire time! He only said those things to get your sympathy and attention. I know it s^cks, but you have to move on. Have you though about all the otHeR better, nicer, and more emotionally stable guys out there? ;D

The best of luck to you. If you forget it, live your life, and realize just how cold hearted he truly is, you'll realize that it isn't even worth your time to feel bad over his a^^!

Answer 6

You took on his pain...as your own. It's like a domino effect. IF U
let it affect u. Get some counseling to help u feel better. You
feel betrayed and let down, that's natural. He is the one who will
most likely stay that way..but u are NOT stuck. You CAN move on....He is an emotional energy sucker. Take Take, all he can
from you. He was emotionally blackmailing you...by threatening
to commit suicide. That was his FIRST mistake. You don't do
that to someone u care about.....u go get help. I think he's
bi-polar. You take care of U.

Answer 7

Please let me, as a man, tell you how sorry I am that the cad treated you the way he did. You sound like a woman any real man would love to be with.

You are a very special person, do not let him (or anyone else) take that from you.

Find a professional to talk to, but keep in mind that you are better off without him.

I wish you the very best. Be strong!

Answer 8

he is narcisstic you have been trotten on and it hurts speeking from my own experience , please dont expect an apology from this sub human filth and also there is defenetly more to his story about his child and the mother. seek support from family and friends i beleive in carma and his is coming. you sound like a kind loving genuine person someone special deserves your love not grubs like him . let me tell you it is a massive sea out there and the fish are always hungry , time will heal your heart . take care and try not to dwell on the past that you cant fix but your future can flourish with out this guy.

Answer 9

Depression is a dangerous thing. Fortunately, there are many well-trained psychiatrists who can help. Please see your doctor. It will take time, and likely medication, to realize that you are still valuable. Depression is often made worse by neurotransmitters in your brain being off balance. This is why a short course (a few months) of medications helps so many people. The SSRI's (selective seratonin reuptake inhibitors) are very helpful, so please, see your doctor. Best of luck. You are worth the trip to the doc.

Answer 10

Sorry that happen to you, he had no right. and tell him that. what he did to you was wrong. and when he soon realizes what he has done to you. he will realize what he lost. move on find someone that will respect you. and be glad that that relationship did not go any further than it did. and if he ever calls you up again and start to cry on your shoulder, tell him to have a nice life. because your through on helping him and getting kicked in the butt.