I had an affair on my wife with an employee.I am in love with the employee and love my wife as a sister. The sex is better with my mistress. My wife suspects cheating, I want to leave-unhappy, she wants counseling, says I owe it to her. What should I do?
2007-02-25 14:38:36 · 10 answers · asked by Lady 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are between a rock and a hard place. Sex with your employee? Man, you got balls. I just hope you don't lose both. The employee could sue you for sexual harrasment. Worst case scenario, you get divorced, lose half of what you owned, get sued by your employee with sexual harrasment and lose the rest. I just wish you good luck and wish you can keep both ;)
2007-02-25 14:52:15 · answer #1 · answered by C L 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure you want to leave your wife for the right reasons? If your leaving just because the sex with the mistress is better, well that's a pretty bad reason.. what happens when the sex with the mistress get's bad.. going to go looking for someone else???
Are you sure you love the employee, or is it just the feeling of falling in love that you are in love with???
I would suggest the counseling.. but first you have to break off all ties with the employee.. even if you don't do the counseling route... before you divorce, break off all ties.. make sure your leaving for the right reason's.. and not the wrong ones... to leave because you think you want to be with someone else.. well it's just opening you up to the same thing happening again and again..
You honestly do not owe anything to anyone but to yourself.. you deserve to be happy.. but again... really look at the marriage.. be sure it's what you want to do before you do it.. sometimes, there is no going back home... If there are children involved.. think of what it will do to them also... will they even accept you after you walk away from their mother?
JMO
2007-02-25 14:45:27 · answer #2 · answered by gin_in_mi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheat, always a cheat. Are you sure you're going to be happy with the mistress a few years down the road??? Your wife deserves better, no matter who she is. Noone should ever cheat. If you fell out of love with your wife, you should have at least given her the respect of leaving her first before sticking your dipstick into someone else's oil. Yes, this has been done to me before and I think men who do this are PIGS! Your mistress is dumb if she thinks you will be devoted to her. Spots don't change. It's people like you who ruin the image of marriage for everyone else. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. Vows are supposed to be lifetime promises.
Give your mistress a message for me.......
Be careful girl.....once a cheat, always a cheat! He cheated on his wife with you....what makes you so sure you can trust him not to cheat on you??
2007-02-25 14:53:48 · answer #3 · answered by Mary D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u r an idiot. if u dont want to be in a rlshp, y cheat on ur wife, break ur marriage vows, disrespect her and urself? why didnt u just leave her and carry on with your mistress. if u ask me, your wife deserves better than you. you are selfish person. and u know what, KARMA!!! watch out.
2007-02-25 14:44:50 · answer #4 · answered by braille 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not really fair to stay in this marriage if u dont love her like a "wife" counseling wont help...be honest with her and tell her its over.
2007-02-25 14:42:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want to repair the relationship with your wife, then it isn't possible.
It's hard to hurt someone you care about, but it sounds like it's over and there is nothing left to be fixed.
2007-02-25 14:54:09 · answer #6 · answered by Kaitelia 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you know the answer tot hat. I do think cheating is wrong though. She must feel betrayed. It is the ultimate betrayal. I know, I was cheated on. Think about how you are making her feel.
2007-02-25 14:44:24 · answer #7 · answered by pink 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you want to leave than why stay and waste both of your lifes, it will probably hurt her, but better sooner than later
2007-02-25 14:42:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
walk away from your wife i feel sorry for her no woman should have to go through that
2007-02-25 14:43:03 · answer #9 · answered by dee_ann 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yea, i figure you do owe it to her, you made a vow to her infront of witnesses, you owe her at least this small gesture of kindness
2007-02-25 15:05:59 · answer #10 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋