No Emotion
The sad melody plays in the background,
As she sits there with a tear rolling down her cheek.
The tear slowly falls to the ground,
As the music starts playing again.
No thoughts cross through the mind,
No emotion is shown as she listens.
She stares out the window,
Staring at the bare field.
She lays her down soon after,
And silently preys to God.
You don’t hear much from her,
Except her stifled cries.
Again the music begins,
And she sits up looking blank.
The tears are gone from her face,
But now there’s no emotion at all.
2007-02-25 12:11:11 · 9 answers · asked by snappypappy797 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Other - Entertainment
You have a very nice poem. It leaves me feeling so sad for her! I hope this is not from one of your own real life experiences. But if it is, you have a beautiful way of putting it into words, all the sadness and pain inside and how it numbs a person. Only one tiny thing wrong, if I may. "And silently prays " instead of preys. ( the word prey is what animals and thrill killers do on their hunt. And then I have forgotten to make the first word of my last sentence a capital letter! LOL) No one but me will notice. I need to work on not being such a perfectionist! Your work is indeed worthy of being published! You should check out the possibility! For real!
2007-02-25 12:23:29 · answer #1 · answered by froggsfriend 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if this is your poem then it was great in keep up the good work my daughter wrote one to about 8 years ago here it goes
With a ragged diamond
of shattered plate-glass
a young man and his girl
are falling backwards into a shop-window.
The young mans face
is bristling with fragments of glass
and the girls leg has caught
on the broken window
and spurts arterial blood
over her wet-look white coat.
Their arms are starfished out
braced for impact,
their faces show surprise, shock,
and the beginning of pain.
The two youths who have pushed them
are about to complete the operation
reaching into the window
to loot what they can smartly.
Their faces show no expression.
It is a sharp, clear night
in Sauchiehall St.
In the background, two drivers
keep their eyes on the road.
2007-02-25 20:26:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Fantastic poem! Good! Carry on the great work.
2007-02-26 02:41:57 · answer #3 · answered by Riya 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i felt a little scared and i think u r a good poem writer. ( if that was yours )
2007-02-25 20:15:21 · answer #4 · answered by Italian_babe 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, it's a little boring
2007-02-25 20:15:18 · answer #5 · answered by ~ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's definitely a sad one...but it's cool.way to go!
2007-02-25 20:21:36 · answer #6 · answered by twenty third dobs 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
interesting...
really is...
managed to make me dwell into it.. and thats wonderful! =)
keep up yr good work!
good luck!
2007-02-25 20:16:03 · answer #7 · answered by C-va™ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ITz 0k.
2007-02-25 20:16:37 · answer #8 · answered by ☆**♥M3Lani3♥**☆ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't understand it,sorry!!
2007-02-25 20:24:32 · answer #9 · answered by Joanne R 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋