I'm living with this guy right now. We are roommates but we used to date each other. We've been living together for a long time but I don't know what to do anymore. He has threatened my cat on many occasions when she has gotten sick. There was a huge blow out and it seemed to get better for a while but it is sliding again. He attacks my skills as a parent (my son is not his) and secong guesses my judgements. He screams and yells at the cat and me. He tried to throw her out of the house and into the snow tonight. I'm not scared he will hurt me physically - but I feel like living like this is ripping me apart. I am worried about up and leaving because of my son's school. He loves his school, and where will I go? I'm afraid to leave my cat alone with him when I go to work. I don't know what to do. I want my son to be able to stay in his school but I know I can't afford anything around here on my own. Please help, are there some options I don't know about? I'm so lost.
2007-02-25 12:11:08 · 9 answers · asked by APducky 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Detail - He was not an Ex when we moved in together. It just became that way.
2007-02-25 12:24:48 · update #1
You sure picked a tyrant for a roommate! That's not good. It may not be safe there. He is not your friend. He's only an emotional and mental abuser. It's not easy getting along with a tyrant. I say defend yourself everyday against this guy. Your absolution is to get a new roommate. Otherwise things will not be happy around this creep. Strength and honor! =<)
2007-02-25 12:34:05 · answer #1 · answered by Sir Grandmaster Adler von Chase 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You might want to move. Because getting rid of the cat seems to be out of the question, but something has to give. Do you think your son has a great day at his wonderful school when his mother is being underminded by her boyfriend all the time. Do you think your son will have this memory of a great man, to turn into or will this be something that you do not want him to mimick. It's hard being a mother, let alone an adult. Do what's best for your family, your son and you.
2007-02-25 20:18:41 · answer #2 · answered by sodgirl6763 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds as though he's controlling. One sign of domestic violence in an abuser is they threathen animals and use tactics such as mental abuse-attacking your parenting skills, and screaming at your cat..he sounds as though he's stressed and frustrated. You could try talking to someone from Catholic Social Services. If there's one in your area...a free counseling facility that helps women who are in abusive relationships. The situation you are in sounds very unhappy for you. Although you are not dating your room mate he sounds abusive and controlling. Try family and friends first for a place to live. If you don't have family contact some shelters, or go to a facility that helps women that are in domestic violence situations. I understand that you may not want to live in a shelter...but they could also give you referrals and possibly help you with your situation. It's not healthy for you or your son to live in a chaotic house. Domestic violence is not only physical but mental as well. Also if having a room mate works for you try looking in the paper for housing quarters that are shared to lower expenses for you. You will still have a room mate but do things properly. Interview the potential room mate. I don't know how old your son is...but the truth is that children just love school period especially the younger they are. Do a priorty list to sort out what's the most important things for you. But your son living in a peaceful environment should be at the top of the list. I have came triumphantly out of an abusive relationship eight years ago. It wasn't physical abuse...but as I said domestic violence is also mental abuse. You can email if you would like to talk further. clark9857@sbcglobal.net.
2007-02-25 20:41:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well for one thing your son doesnt need exposed to that kind of a guy he needs to be around a better example of what a man should be like and doesnt sound like that guy is a very good example for your son. that is much more important than the school ur son is going to not that a good school is not important it is but he's seeing the actions of a the way a man shouldnt be and that will be listens he will take with him for the rest of his life. so think about that before you decide to stay just so your son will be in a better school your son or you needs to be living with a guy like that i'd say get out and stay out. you both deserve better.
2007-02-25 20:16:57 · answer #4 · answered by Robert C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look for another apartment.....there is nothing else you can do besides that. As far as Im concerned, thats abuse..PERIOD...So look for another apartment in the area so your son will be happy. If there are no more apartments available, your first mistake was to moving or rooming with your ex in the first place...So therefore, if you cant move, you will most likely have to stick wit it for a while until you find yourself somewhere else to go....GOOD LUCK...
2007-02-25 20:16:31 · answer #5 · answered by Ti-Ti 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out now. It is so much better for your son to adjust to a new school than live with a monster like that,and until you can maybe a friend or family member can take care of the cat until you find another place to live. If you dont leave you are sending a message to your son that it is ok for him to treat women like that. He will adjust just fine to another school I promise you. So please get out now PLEASE!!!!!
2007-02-25 20:18:00 · answer #6 · answered by HOT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how come you can't just leave the cat in your room before you leave? and you can't move somewhere where your son can still stay at that school? no family? friends? nothing?
2007-02-25 20:15:37 · answer #7 · answered by Lauren_Ann20 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seek help from organizations! they will help! womens org!
or move to yr parents place? or friends?
Sure u have close friends who u can count on...
2007-02-25 20:17:31 · answer #8 · answered by C-va™ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i think you should kill him, no one should hurt a cat, kill him tonight
2007-02-25 20:15:49 · answer #9 · answered by jessica d 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋