people she said she didn't have sex with before we got married, but later after being married I she admitted she did. I am upset about it. We've been married 14 years. Should I be upset or should I get over it. What are your thoughts.
2007-02-25 11:34:49 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Iplaymerc: I'm upset about being lied too.
2007-02-25 11:45:13 · update #1
Get over it. The fact that you are still upset about it after all these years means that you still love her just as much as you ever did, you're kind of jealous about it. She lied then because, well, women just don't admit to how many lovers they've had and especially if one or more of the lovers were creeps or friends of yours. Take it from me, whatever the "number" is, you can at least double it!
As long as she's not sleeping around now, so what? You won her. She should be flattered that you are still ticked/jealous about it. I sure do wish my husand would get jealous of me just once.
2007-02-25 13:15:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand you being upset because she lied to you. However coming from a woman who was up front and honest about her past, you guys really do tend to use it against us every time you get angry. Has it ever accured to you that by not being honest she has saved her self alot of arguing like you guys are doing now.
If you have had 14 years of marriage with no other problems let it go and get on with the rest of your lives.
2007-02-25 21:23:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's understandable that you would be upset about that. She is not as honest a person as you thought she was when you married her. It would make me wonder what else she lied about before you got married and what does she lie about now? On the other hand, were YOU 100% honest about everything before you got married, and are you totally honest now? Not that two wrongs make a right, but sometimes thinking about this helps to put things in perspective. Good luck.
2007-02-25 19:45:28 · answer #3 · answered by PAK 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hey!!!?? its wrong yes!! but if she told you the truth would you have married her?? no is probably the answer!! she knew u were a good catch and if she told u you would bail!! or she did not want to hurt you. we all have skeletons in our closet and im sure u do to i say the 14 yrs have been good give or take let her know u r not happy that she lied to you! and u dont want it done anymore. leave it alone and move on. it not worth ruining a great marriage.
2007-02-25 20:02:23 · answer #4 · answered by angelswife 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Now, were you two engaged when you asked her this question? Plus, what made her bring that up now, or did you bring it up? It is not good to bring up the past in any relationship. That's where problems start. Now, is now. You both need to apologize to each other for your behavior. Because, why should it matter now? You are with her and no one else is.
Yes, please do get over it. But, no more bringing up the past. So go over to her and give her that great big hug and kiss!
2007-02-25 20:25:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand you are upset but the past is the past and you will need to get over this and move on. Did you save yourself for marriage?
2007-02-25 19:43:03 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hum would you have still married her at the time knowing that she had been with others. If so get over it, if not move out tomorrow and file for a divorce.
2007-02-25 19:40:20 · answer #7 · answered by brp_13 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You're upset about something from 14 YEARS ago?
2007-02-25 19:44:18 · answer #8 · answered by WhooHoo! 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would be kinda upset that she lied, but you've had her for 14 years - yeah it's time to get over it.
2007-02-25 19:40:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
you must feel something for her for you are still there after 14 years at this stage get over it i mean bet you slept with women before you met your wife ? so whats the problem
2007-02-25 20:11:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋