My ex bf is getting married to this 18 girl which he knows nothing about. They met online and haven't even known eachother more than a month yet. They will be meeting for the first time this week and they get married this FRIDAY. How do I let him know he's making a big mistake without sounding jealous?
2007-02-25 09:36:42 · 21 answers · asked by MrS.WilSoN 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you truly care about him as a person and your not just jealous that he is getting married to someone else... then you should tell him how you feel.. but it is up to him to decide if he is making a mistake... this is his mistake not your...
2007-02-25 09:43:18 · answer #1 · answered by ***Girlie Girl*** 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. You DO sound jealous. He is your ex. It is his life. Let him live it. You are no longer a part of his romantic life. If you say something, you WILL seem jealous. The fact that you disapprove because he hasn't known her long, she is only 18 and they met online, already is a tip-off to me that you know too much and care too much about the details of your ex-boyfriend's current relationship. If his marriage fails and he comes to you as a friend, then and only then, can you offer a supportive ear and be the friend that you hope to be. To try to do so now not only tells him you are jealous and want him back, but it tells him that you don't give him much credit for having enough of a brain to make wise decisions. If I were the guy, I'd be offended if you did that. Leave things be. If he has problems with his marriage, then be supportive and encouraging - but don't try to undermine his marriage. If you truly care about him, you will want him to be happy. Help him to be happy by being the supportive friend - not the discouraging ex-girlfriend.
2007-02-25 09:42:33 · answer #2 · answered by Chimichanga to go please!! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't up to you to be the judge of what is right and wrong for him (or for anyone). I understand your concern for him, however who knows that it will be a mistake? Who says it will work out? No one can say. Let him go ahead and do what he is going to do. Maybe this is the right thing, right now. You can voice your "interest" to him about what your concerns are etc. However, have you ever considered that maybe he is just telling you that because he wants to see what your reaction will be? Or that he wants to see if you will get jealous and come back to him? I mean there could be alterior motives too. So don't read too much into it, and what will be, will be. If it is meant to be then there isn't anything that you could do anyway.
2007-02-25 09:46:05 · answer #3 · answered by Austins Mom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The key word here is EX!!
I think it would be best if you just leave well enough alone. If he is making a mistake, it will all come out in the end. Besides, how do you know that he isn't just messing with everyone. I know people that do that to their nosey ex's. They start rumors just to see what will happen.
2007-02-25 10:04:15 · answer #4 · answered by mrslang1976 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't.. your an ex no matter what you say it will come out wrong. Online marriages like that are called a 'hook' I watched one of our friends do the exact same thing.. what was really going on is she gets pregnant and then turns into this evil witch she kicks him out and he has to pay child support the rest of his life while she has her real boyfriend move back in with her. Its a real scam.. and many nice guys get caught. But I don't think your ex is going to believe you or me .. sorry :-(
2007-02-25 09:41:50 · answer #5 · answered by Tapestry6 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did say he was your EX. Leave it alone, maybe it
takes him a few times in life to make mistakes before he
realizes that he needs to know more about women before
getting involved. Why get involved in something that is
none of your concern.
2007-02-25 09:43:18 · answer #6 · answered by RudiA 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The more you find fault or push them the more they run in the other direction. He is your EX you need to step away and if you are friends be his friends if he needs help later to find a therapist or a lawyer you be there if you want to but only if he wants this.
You have a happy life :)
2007-02-25 09:49:55 · answer #7 · answered by Cheryl J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't.
He's your EX bf. He is going to need to make his own mistakes. Be glad he's not making them with you. Let go of him now and move on and do things for You.
2007-02-25 09:40:01 · answer #8 · answered by booktender 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shut up and get on with your own life, your ex-husband is none of your concern anymore. It's his life to live as he chooses, if you wanted a say-so in his decisions you shouldn't have divorced him.
2007-02-25 09:41:19 · answer #9 · answered by WhooHoo! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. He is your EX, worry about your own life, he is not your problem anymore. If it's a "mistake", he'll find out for himself sooner or later.
2007-02-25 09:40:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋