I dated this guy for 11 months and everything went smoothly we never fought or argued and there weren't any actual issues in the relationship. Then one day I had to take a trip out of the country for 5 weeks and when I got back we broke up. It was a mutual decision. You know we decided that we both needed to meet other people or w.e Anyways about two months after the break up we decided that it would be alright for both of us to continue to have a sexual relationship since we were both single and very much use to each other. It has been 1 1/2 yrs since we decided this and I have tried and he has tried to date other people but for some reason none of our new partners help us forget each other. The other problem is that his parents don't feel that I'm "right" for him. What should I do? Should I stand up to him and tell him that I love him and want to be his girlfriend again? Or should I try to move on? It's been 2 1/2 years with the same company and we both do love each other. Help us!
2007-02-25 09:05:01 · 11 answers · asked by k9pup316 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I have met his parents back when we were going out. I don't think they know that we're still together in a sense. We have tried many times to stop having sex. But we both end up wanting each other even more and even crying about it. It hurts us to be apart but to be together is sort of forbidden. So how do I tell him that we should move on?
2007-02-25 09:15:31 · update #1
First of all, his parents feelings about you being right or wrong for him don't have any bearing on whether or not you two are a couple. You're not the first girl who's had that problem (I've got my hand raised!). Probably no one will be right for their son anyway. I think you both need to be alone together, and talk about your expectations, if you have any. If you want a future with this fella, tell him. Not knowing is worse than knowing. You can't build a future on wondering. I fully believe that, until you have a ring on your finger, you shouldn't be having sex with him, or anyone else. It just gets in the way, especially when you're trying to figure things out. Talk to him and find out what his feelings are. If he wants to continue sailing along on the same calm seas, it might be time to pull up your anchor and sail on. It sounds like you want things to move along, so it's up to you to ask those hard questions and see where you stand in his life. After more than 2 years with him, he should know what he wants by now. Some people get stuck in their comfort zones, and don't want to move on, unless forced to do so. Once you open this can of worms, there's no putting the lid back on, so make sure this is what you want. Otherwise, wait for him to make the first move. Personally, I'm a woman of action, and I need to know where I stand, so that I can stop wasting my time on something that has no future. I hope you find your future soon, with your true soul-mate & best friend. I've been married to mine for almost 30 years now, so it's do-able. <*)))><
2007-02-25 09:20:51 · answer #1 · answered by Sandylynn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that the question is not really about your relationship and whether or not you love each other, but about his parents' feelings toward you.
I think that if he really loves you, he should take your relationship to another level, like getting engaged. Since you say you love each other, you both should stop seeing other people and make a commitment to establish a stable, loving relationship. If you want to get married and have a family, you should do that.
Your boyfriend needs to sit down with his parents to find out why they don't think you're good enough enough for him and he needs to make it clear that you are going to be an important part of his life. He should also try to have you and his family spend time together so that you can get to know each other.
If he doesn't have any interest in doing this, he probably doesn't love you as much as he claims and is too worried about keeping his parents happy. That's not a healthy relationship to be in.
2007-02-25 17:21:13 · answer #2 · answered by mariepphm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you guys have not let go of your relationship yet. You have 2 options, cut off from him cold turkey and give this "let's see other people" a fair chance to work, or skip the seeing other people bit and get back together. My point being that you cannot move on with other people if you do not let go of your relationship with him
2007-02-25 17:10:20 · answer #3 · answered by uz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello k9 pup.
You say that when you came back from your trip after 5 weeks you broke up.
Maybe this is your key, what was it after that period of being away which brought this about ?
It appears you both did not miss each other to much at this time or you would not have wanted to seperate as soon as you arrived home.
Take care!.
2007-02-25 18:14:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
um if ur both in luv then whats the problem .. forget what his parents want and think, what parent doesn't want their children to marry a king or a queen .. life just doesn't work like that, and if u enjoy sex & life together i don't see why ur both waisting time, what happends if one or the other finally finds sum1 they really like .. ur gonna feel dumn for not speaking up earlier
~grab him b4 sum1 else does, gurl ~
2007-02-25 17:12:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, having sex with each other never really let you detatch to fully experience partnership with other people...you were still partially holding on...
If you really do love him...you could try it once more...but usually the second time around never works either.
When you travel together...you see sides to a person you wouldn't normally see....just like living together.
Do what your heart tells you
2007-02-25 17:09:23 · answer #6 · answered by xtaticlyme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, if u love him you should tell him. if your heart feels that way, that is the way to go. as for the parents thing you are not right for him, he loves u and thats all that matters and his parents should respect that. you know that you have tried to see other people and it is just not workiing. you guys love eachother and nothing can hold that back
2007-02-25 17:10:55 · answer #7 · answered by wildfire224 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think you should tell him how you feel. And as for his parents. Try meeting with them and try to make a good impression. You always gain their trust.
2007-02-25 17:09:55 · answer #8 · answered by helpful?? =D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how you feel. See how he feels. Make a decision. If you stay in the middle you will not be happy.
2007-02-25 17:13:27 · answer #9 · answered by Albatross 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this guy has it made free sex and dating others honey if he cared about you hed bring you home to mamma stop the free ride
2007-02-25 17:22:38 · answer #10 · answered by fred l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋