or do you love him/her for who they are?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=dj1BuNmhjAY
2007-02-25 09:04:42 · 15 answers · asked by -.- 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
A long time ago I thought that love was something that you reserved for some special set of people that you had judged worthy of it.
After a while I got to thinking about what Jesus had said about turning the other cheek and loving our neighbor I put the two together and realized that he had made no exceptions in these statements. It became obvious to me that he intended that we exclude no one from the love that we are supposed to be giving. I started thinking about my idea of love and suddenly realized that I had not been loving anyone at all. I had simply been judging everyone and every thing.
Judging someone worthy of love is not love, it is only judgment. I actually started to cry when I realized this. I saw just how much of my life I had wasted being judgmental, thinking of myself as a Christian, when I was actually doing just the opposite of what Jesus had asked us to do.
I thought about the verse judge not lest ye be judged, and I understood it for the first time.
I realized that I have a lot of catching up to do. So many opportunities were wasted. I now try to apply the love that I have for the world in a universal way like Jesus asks us to do.
If I start to feel afraid and think that I see someone that I should not love because of something I have thought or heard I try to catch my mistake as soon as possible. I tell myself that I have forgot the truth and have fallen for the same old trick that had cost me so many opportunities to be loving in the past. The horror of this realization is often all that is necessary to bring me back to my senses and make me drop the judgmental nonsense I was thinking.
I still have a lot to learn about love, but at least I’m making progress.
Love and blessings
Your brother
don
2007-02-25 14:10:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are because of our qualities. We can't detach ourselves from our qualities. Our qualities make us who we are and our possessiveness make us what we are. The wealth we have, the technical expertise we have, the things we have make us what we are. "What we are" is akin to being materialistic.
Loving someone regardless of his/her qualities is the kind of love Jesus, Buddha, Dalai Lama has for all - the metaphysical love. If you fall in love with someone, there is always the "quality" playing it's role. Can I love a girl and decide to be her life partner if she is rude and nasty? I doubt it. But if a rude and nasty girl comes to me and seeks help to change her ways, then I can show love towards her and help her be a better person. In other words, the romantic love always happens for a reason no matter how much we deny it. The reason however, can be either "who" or "what" as I explained above. Personally I think loving someone for his/her qualities ("who") is far better than loving someone for "what" s/he is.
There can also be cases where there is a combination of romantic and metaphysical love existing towards the same person.
2007-02-25 18:49:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The inner qualities of a person will certainly outlast the outer covering, so you better be looking for quality.
2007-02-25 17:56:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My computer's whimpy, so I can't get the 411 fr utube.
"I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love. " < Blessed Mother Teresa > This seems to fit well with you general question.
2007-02-25 17:45:36 · answer #4 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Surely
2007-03-05 16:31:15 · answer #5 · answered by Laura S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love my husband in spite of his qualities.
At first, yes--I was attracted to him because of how I thought he was (his qualities)--my interpretation of who he was. As time went on-- I realized he wasn't who I initially perceived--but I loved him anyway.
So not exactly "for" who he is--but because he is himself.. Not much of a distinction--but in my mind the two are different.
2007-02-25 18:11:59 · answer #6 · answered by Laura Joy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A person's qualities IS who they are.
2007-03-05 12:00:26 · answer #7 · answered by choose happiness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A person is the sum of their qualities, even if some of those qualities are transcendental.
2007-02-25 17:29:54 · answer #8 · answered by Sophist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, i believe you do. Their qualities should also bring out or compliment yours as well.
It is also important to take time in learning to 'know' someone...so you can love them for who they are.
2007-02-25 17:44:17 · answer #9 · answered by missnmama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for who he is
2007-02-25 17:28:13 · answer #10 · answered by solas lethe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋