help im pregnant and i dont know what to do im only 16 and my boyfrined is really controlling and i dont know if i can be a good mom or even be with him. help me!
2007-02-25 07:50:18 · 31 answers · asked by so confused 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
If I had a sixteen year old daughter ( I have sons) I hope she would come to me. I would be concerned , of course, but I would want her to reach out to me. I would be there for her and a possible grandchild. But,I couldn't help her if I didn't know about the situation. Please talk to your parent/s or an adult that you trust. Soon. Best wishes.
2007-02-25 08:33:16 · answer #1 · answered by honiebyrd 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first and most important thing you need to do is talk to mum , she may be angry but she will come round and be there for you , you`re her baby remember !
Secondly , ditch the b/f , i don`t like the sound of him , you will be a better mother without a control freak in your life ..
Thirdly , you will be a great mum , i know a few young mums and they are fantastic with their babies . You will be too . Let your mother help when she offers etc , they aren`t babies that long really they grow so fast and you can still finish your education and get yourself some good grades to get a good job to bring up your child ..
I wish you all the very best .. I have a 16 yr old and i would be so disappointed if she came and told me she was pregnant but at the end of the day i am still her mum and i love her unconditionally and i am sure your mum does too ..
Good Luck sweetheart x
2007-02-25 08:03:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing you need to do is concentrate on deciding what YOU want to do about the pregnancy. Find somebody you can confide in - it would be best if you could tell your parents but if this is not an option another adult, a best friend or even somebody proffesional. A family planning clinic will offer advice medically & emotionaly or put you in touch with somebody who can help. It is free & you dont always need an appointment, just find your local one on the internet. Don't worry about whether you will be a good mum or not, all first time parents have this worry but it is un-necessary. If you are willing to love and care and support your child then the rest will come naturally.
If you dont want to be with your boyfriend that is your choice, it is also your choice how much he has to do / or not be involved with the baby if you chose to have it. Make sure you begin to talk this over with other people and dont let him bully you into a decision you do not want to make. All the best x
2007-02-26 23:19:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
So where are your parents? At 16, you're too young to be on your own, let alone pregnant. However, the deed is done already, so you need to plan your future. Don't even consider the controlling boyfriend unless you want a life of misery, or even abuse. If your parents aren't around or not an option, get some advice from an adult that you trust -- an aunt or other relative. You need some help, because you can't do this alone. You have to decide whether to end the pregnancy or put the baby up for adoption. I don't think you're prepared emotionally or financially to take care of a baby and raise it properly. But you need the advice of someone who knows you and your circumstances. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Good luck!
2007-02-25 07:58:08 · answer #4 · answered by gldjns 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok first of all...breathe, calm down, I know its hard. You have to focus on what is best for you and your child. Do you love the boyfriend? Can you see a future with someone so controlling?
You have to think of your future too, no matter what. If you don't feel like you can talk to your parents, try a teacher or counsellor, or even family doctor. They will help you look at all of your options.
It is your body and your child at the end of the day. DO NOT let anyone force you into decisions that you don't want. You will be fine i'm sure. All the best and all the luck in the world to you xx
2007-02-25 07:58:17 · answer #5 · answered by bubble 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to someone preferably your parents. I won't bang on about contraception as what's done is done but you need to address the issue now and don't sweep it under the carpet, it won't go away. Some young girls think that if their partner leaves they won't be able to cope on their own but you are never alone with a baby. There are many support mechanisms out there that will help and so will your family and there is nothing wrong with bringing up a baby on your own. I did it and my son is a lovely little boy. My ex partner was also controlling but my son made me stronger and i knew i didn't need him around with his bad attitude and so i walked away. Is your boyfriend even gonna like the fact you're pregnant, have you told him? Please speak to someone soon and do what feels right for you, don't be pushed into anything you don't want to do. I wish you the best of luck with whatever happens x
2007-02-25 08:02:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh no! You must and I cannot stress this enough, you must talk to someone who you can be open with to discuss your options. If your boyfriend is controlling and you seem unhappy about it, the first thing to do is think about what you really want for yourself and most importantly your baby. I do not advocate abortion, in fact I am totally against. I will however tell you this, at 16 to have a baby will change your life completely. You must think very carefully about what you would like to do. If your boyfriend is not helping the situation, leave. The first thing you should do is talk to someone who you think might be able to guide you - how about your mum? Good luck. x
2007-02-25 07:59:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you talk to your parents about this? Or if not, do you have a trusted adult that can listen to you and help you through the choices you will have to make. If your boyfriend is really controlling, ask yourself, do you want him to be that way with your child? There are lots of things you need to think about, but make sure you get help and support from people you trust and who care about you. Look after yourself.
2007-02-25 08:16:13 · answer #8 · answered by Jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to speak to your parents or a counsellor to help you through this. It doesn't sound like you are with the right guy and things will not improve once the baby arrives. Every woman doubts her ability to be a good mom from time to time. Don't worry about that part yet, you need to sort out your relationship with your boyfriend first.
2007-02-25 08:14:36 · answer #9 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your not the first underage mum hun and you wont be the last, i suggest you tell your parents,they will scream and shout for a while but they will get over it and support you
sorry but your B\F sounds like an *** get rid of him,you dont want someone controlling you,just think of you and your baby hun and no one else
you will make a good mum as your asking for help, so go tell your parents and im sure your worrying for nothing
it will all be good in the end .good luck
2007-02-25 14:10:11 · answer #10 · answered by ♥♥™Tia™♥♥ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋