Do you think that Gay men have unrealistic ideals of what type of guy they want to be with?

Question

its really imposible to find someone thats perfect. i find it interesting that no gay men are answering this question

Answer 1

Yes, we gay men do have a very unrealistic ideal of what kind of men we want to be with. I think that many gay men confuse their fantasy men with reality. I think that if more gay men took the true love that actually comes to them when it comes, the gay community would be less of a whore house. But too many guys are holding out for what they think is mister right. The biggest problem with good looking gay guys is that they KNOW they are good looking and they always go for their idol peers. Straight guys aren't usually ever that picky. The gay way of thinking is "I put all this time and energy into building up this hot and beautiful body of mine, so I only want someone else who like me who deserves what I've got." This is total ego, and any relationship will be based on lust and sex and never love. For me, as far as I'm concerned, if he can make it across the street on his own, he's mister right! I've been young, thin and cute, and I've been muscular and hunky, and I've been big and bear-ish, and never has what I looked like determined what my partner would look like, and never have I put love in a box and said "he must be exactly LIKE THIS." Now, if only more gay people would think that way, we'd all be happily married.

Answer 2

YES, many gay men have very unrealistic ideals of what type of guy they want to be with, but not all of them. It's probably the worst in LA, where people say everyone is a 9 looking for a 10. I'm glad I don't live there.

Some of us are still down to earth, thank god.

Answer 3

I'm a gay man, and I know what you mean. It seems that everyone out there thinks they're a "10", and looking for a "12" on the scale of beauty!

But isn't this also true of straight men as well? I have many straight male friends who act the same way!

I think what it boils down to is that there are a LOT of superficial people in this world. No one said it would be easy to find your soul mate. Keep an open mind, an open eye, and best of luck!

Answer 4

As others have said I think that we all have unrealistic ideals of our potential partners.

Having said that I think that gay men tend to fixate on one particular type of partner to the exclusion of all others (shaved, buff, masculine etc etc). Like everyone we can get stuck on the physical details (and the emotional and mental ones too don't get me wrong) but we seem to all want a cookie cutter stereotypical type of guy that really doesn't exist.

Not sure if that makes any sense or not though ;),

Cheers,

Answer 5

Mean and women regardless of sexual preference can have unrealistic ideals of a partner. Everyone WILL have a flaw, it's a matter of being able to accept the flaws. Find the "perfect" person only exists in the utopian world. A good couple of any kind will accept one another for who they are no matter the circumstances.

Answer 6

I think in fantasy gay men prolly do that, but in reality the ones that want to stay committed find someone close to their ideal in looks but compatible in spirit. Thats what I did. Its working so far.

Answer 7

Sometimes, but that's not because they're gay. I have that same unrealistic ideals, but nobody should settle for less than what they want

Answer 8

No. I really don't think they do anymore then any other orientation does. I feel that we all at one time or another have unrealistic ideals of whom or what we want to be with at one time or another in our lives. I think its just a matter of when we choose to lower that standard or settle as it were.
Hope this helps you.
Good luck

Answer 9

Yes, I think a lot of them do. But I don't think it is limited to just gay men, I think the same is true for breeders and lesbians too.

Answer 10

No more so than heterosexual men. Sorry I am not gay, but I think the question crosses over to anyone.