Hi there, My 17 year old son is fascinated with Thailand and wants to do a 4 week holiday from this gap year company. I'm a bit afraid to allow him to go as he would be going alone and meeting the folk in thailand itself. he would have spare time to do as he pleases and i'm worried he wont be safe alone. there will be others doing this gap holiday but obviously he wont be childminded as such.
Am I being too over protective?
He will hate us if we don't let him go and can we stop him anyway? If we dont let him go now he will go when he's 18 anyway without our permission,
What shall we do?
2007-02-25 02:28:59 · 14 answers · asked by laplandfan 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
He has almost finished a year at college. As parents we do give him a lot of space and ability to make his own decisions. I'm more nervous becase this is thailand. If he were going to Spain i probably wouldn't be so worried. And if he were going with a friend the i wouldn't be so worried.
2007-02-25 02:39:18 · update #1
Thank you all for your replies. he has saved to go himself. He is paying the cost of the holiday and we will pay his air fare.
2007-02-25 04:34:34 · update #2
I don't know your son well enough to make a good judgement. However, you do. He's obviously a bright kid since he's completed 1 year of college. Naturally you're worried. But you and only you can make the right decision. It's easy for others to say, "sure let him go" but they don't know your son. If he was always dependable and honest with you then you may have to give him the benefit of the doubt. Personally, I don't know the difference between the risks by allowing him to go to Thailand and those by allowing him to go to Spain.
2007-02-25 05:24:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Being a parent is almost entirely about letting them go, that's what we do, little by little, as you say, he'll make his own choice once he's 18 anyway, why cause conflict in your relationship with him. Let him go with your blessing but make sure he's aware of the potential risks, especially the risk of being in deep deep trouble when he gets home if he doesn't call at least once a week!!!
2007-02-25 08:17:35 · answer #2 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to trust your son it will be a great experience for him i know its hard but you have to let him go and enjoy life i was 16 when i moved out into my own house and although it seems young you will be surprised how grown up a 17 year old can be just ask him to keep in touch even if its just a text message everyday so you can put your mind at ease and stop worrying
2007-02-25 04:34:12 · answer #3 · answered by sha23z 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally I don't think he should go alone, unless he is with a group of trusted friends, it sounds he's going to go now or later, so maybe he should go when he's a little older and experienced. Tell him what you think, put your foot down if you have to. 17 year olds like me don't normally take gap years until they are 18, 19 or 20, he must have only left school a couple of months ago, so obviously he shouldn't be able to go alone.
2007-02-25 02:35:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
if he's very sensible yes only if he's wise to a lot of stuff.
mad maniac and would go nuts definitely no .
like you say he could go next year but its just so scarey thinking he is on own ,personally my own son wouldn't have a clue about anything and he wouldn't be allowed unless adult with him .
if you are paying for the trip you stop him by saying you cant afford it if he's paying sounds like he is quite responsible
2007-02-25 02:37:24 · answer #5 · answered by Nutty Girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its a trust issue....See how he does on his own on this trip and if he has to come back early he can maybe.Hes 17 and wants to do things for himself,which he will be doing anyway next year.
2007-02-25 02:37:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a smart kid, already finished a year of college and only 17. In college you have to make smart choices on your own, and it sounds like he already is pretty independant.
If he really wants to go, I would let him.
2007-02-25 03:30:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
he is totally old enough. maybe lay down a few rules, like how much money he can take, but you are being a little unreasonable. you said yourself he'll go anyway and hate you in the process, so i think you know what you have to do
2007-02-25 04:06:10 · answer #8 · answered by jimi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
thailand's not as bad as you think i ve been and felt much safer than i do in the uk trust in your parenting skills ! if you have taught him how to be safe and sensible let him go show you he can
2007-02-25 04:00:12 · answer #9 · answered by TOM P 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
learn to trust your son.
he is nearly an adult.
it sounds like you are over protective of him and mayb that is why he is so desparate to go far away from you.
take off his leash...and support him thru this and ask his friends to go with him so he will have company and be safer.
stop being so negative because he will hate you for it.
2007-02-25 02:33:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋