My husband is addicted to playing computer games. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can help him to stop?

Answer 1

Judith, maybe first be thankful that it's Computer Games and not cyber-porn. That's a PLUS.

Now, for myself whom went through about a 2 year period being "addicted" although a strong term,......to playing Computer Games, it did eventually pass for me, but, I wasn't married at the time.

Now, if you want him to stop,......playing so much, I wonder as opposed to what? Are you missing spending time with him? Is he shirking responsibilities? Is he messing up your normal household schedules and structure? In other words, is he really causing problems, or does it bother you that he just plays too much?

Regardless; I would sit down with him (of course when he's not playing) and tell him honestly your concerns.

Ask him to compromise. If you'd like to spend more time with him, tell him so. If he's not taking care of marital or home duties,.......tell him honestly about it also.

I see that you could probably compromise with him and hopefully he will abide.

First, you may want to understand what he is playingand why he plays it so much. What is it doing for him. Does it make him feel good. Is he playing games or simulations or such that is taking him through like a second childhood of sorts? If you understand what they driving force behind his enjoyment, then it will be easier to reason with him.

Make a deal with him and tell him: "Honey",......."Dear" or whatever terms of endearment you use, and tell him you don't mind him playing, but not so much.

Ask if he's be willing to play just a couple hours a night, or on certain days. Or, maybe you can find a game you both can play if you'd like to play and feel left out.

Most guys (myself included) get tired of the game play after awhile, and the sense of newness and excitement diminishes. However; a merit system might be in order, and you may have to resort acting like a "Mom" for an abbreviated time if need be concerning his CPU play.

CXhances are he's playing online against others in a league or in some type of war simulation, sports game, or other such interactive game. It's just an extension and another road that a man will pursue if it allows him to be competitive and men are naturally that way, even if just trying to be a computer opponent.

Either way, nicely ask him to play in moderation, and to only do so for "x" amount of hours per day, or on certain days. Tell him that other priorities have to be considered and you don't want your relationship or home-life to be dictated by his need to play "all the time".

If he learns that there will be the reward or be able to look forward to play games if he spends "x" amount of time with you, and "x" amount of time on household projects, and "x" amount of time on other things that requires his action and attention, he will be stepping back long enough to realize that he is in fact being ruled by his whims of playing.

In any case, I think you have a workable situation here, and if he realizes he can play and still do all the other things he's need for, he will be able to integrate moderation and see how much time he's been spending in the form of too much play time.

Just don't take drastic measures. There is no use in creating a serious level of disharmony where diplomacy by you and recognition by him can bring things into a healthy and harmonious balance.

Good Luck!

Answer 2

Ever tried playing a computer game with him, maybe? And what is "addicted" exactly. Does he play 8 hours a day, 7 days a week? Or does he play for an hour or two every other day? Maybe you should tell him that you feel neglected and lonely and wish that he would set aside some time for you two to spend time together. Give him something more fun as an option to quitting gaming so often. You can't just tell him to stop and then hand him a broom and tell him to do housework.

Answer 3

I was addicted to video games as well. I think I was bored with life and gaming was the only outlet that I had. I imagine your husband has been on the same job for a while and you two have been married for several years and have children. Gaming is "me" time. Looking back, I kinda regret spending that much time playing video games, because it took me away from reality and took my attention away from my family. Even when I was "spending time" with my family, I was thinking about gaming.
It was bad. I would get off of my wife and onto the playstation. It was not until I went back to graduate school that I no longer was interested in playing video games. But good luck to you. I hope I helped.

Btw....gaming does keep your mind off of other women.....for whatever it's worth.

Answer 4

Does he let the games get in the way of his job and household obligations and such? If he still pays attention to you, takes time out for you and works and such then let him have his computer time. If he is a bum and has no time for you then try some drastic measures and get rid of the computer after talking to him first and telling him just how you feel. Know what I mean? Addiction to anything is not really a good thing and can be worked out as long as both of you want this. God Bless you both.

Answer 5

Hey don't try stopping him this would make things really bad for you guys because he is going to say that you are taking away one thing that he really wants to do. Sounds familiar? Oh yes I have this stress too but I decided hey can't beat em then join em.
Just make him give you quality time and have fun with him at times. I'm sure there are things that you like to do that he doesn't like to do. My husband hates when I work and when I am on this site and we adapt to each other. Look I think that you should compromise should be added to your marriage because without it you are headed for doom.
Go easy on the guy with his games maybe play with him at times. Get games that you would be interested in I like games that are strategic there must be something that you like. By doing something that he likes and in turn that you like it would bring you closer together.

Answer 6

Talk to him about it. Set days and times for his games and the rest he should refrain from playing. (As in, play games from 8 - 11PM on Mondays and Thursdays, but not otherwise.) If he can't help himself, have him go with you to gamblers anonymous because they help people with addictive personalities. One last thought: a candlelight dinner created by you wearing a little black nightie? He might forget to turn the computer on.

Answer 7

attempt conversing to him, and letting him be attentive to which you're at your "wits end." Ask him to barter a life like quantity of time on the pc, so as which you adult males may well be mutually. I recommend that he set small objectives for himself to stop his pc time, which includes lowering an hour an afternoon for a month, then 2 hours an afternoon, etc. in line with danger even combating all mutually if he can not shrink down. If this would not paintings, then you definately will could take greater advantageous measures, which includes sabotaging the pc (e.g. pulling out the plug); or no longer conversing to him whilst "he" needs, because of the fact he of course won't seek advice from you whilst "you" choose. attempt to make the time he spends on the pc punishing for him, yet enable him be attentive to which you like him, so he won't resent you for doing this. this could enable him be attentive to which you're severe. Be continual. If this would not paintings, then cover the pc till you 2 come to three greater valuable words of settlement for pc use; and if this would not paintings, then throw the pc interior the trash.

Answer 8

Tell him to quit, if he doesn't then divorce him. My wife has put WoW before me, my shild, and my home since she's played, that's one of the many reasons I'm divorcing. People have sued the gaming companies for stuff like this in the past and won, I'm sure the companies added some sort of clause preventing this by now though.

Answer 9

I will shed a light that my mother shed on me when I complained about the same thing. She said , " I wish they had video games when I was with your dad, and he would have been interested in them. Instead he went to the bars all the time and was addicted to cheating on her". She asked me which one I would rather have, and the answer was easy. At least I know where he is and what he is doing. It could be allot worse.

Answer 10

I lived with a gamer for 6 years, and I never got him to stop. Similarly, many of my friends are in relationsips/marriages with gamers that are always "plugged in." You can't ever make anyone do anything. You can tell him you don't like it and how it makes you feel. You can suggest counseling if you think that there's an underlying issue that's causing him to immerse himself in gaming, but ultimately, you can only make choices for your self. Stay or go is one of those choices.