Its depressing and people agree with me about this. All the excitement I had in my teens and 20s travelling round California and Europe following Queen with like minded fans/stalkers seem just a wonderful memory. Id like to think I could travel around the US again and go coast to coast like ive done a couple of times but it seems once your married thats it. My marriage is a mess and I intend to start out again soon by myself, but it seems noone in their 40s does anything except go on package holis as the hightlight of their year. I mean I think going to bed (by myself as I have no bed companion) is my fave time of day at mo, when I spread out in my PJs cuddle my pillow, listen to Virgin and fantasise about my fave celeb Robbie W. OK I need to grow up but I just dont want to! Anyone agree?
2007-02-25 00:46:24 · 22 answers · asked by jane b 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
not all people do that...
2007-02-25 00:49:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh my God, are you crazy, life is what you make it!
I married at 20, split up at 32, had four kids at that stage. Didn't start to live until my late thirties; met a guy 12 years my junior; we had three magical years together; had a baby, then my partner died. Five kids,all under 16. i was 39 when I had him.
I took life by the b**ls and held on; had no money ever; got a job; got several! Put my kids through school; did some courses, got a better job;
I've been a chef, a driving instructor, a journalist, a debt collector, a delivery person..i'm now managing an office with four staff working for me - I am at college two nights a week. this autumn, I am taking 6 weeks off work, buying a round the world ticket, and heading off , alone!!
i'm 53; I feel life has so much to offer me yet.
Ditch the bad marriage; bad relationships only drag you down.
Think about your dreams...if you had a real choice and money was no object, what would you like to do?
Would you go travelling again?
Would you like to re-train for something?
A friend of mine has just qualified as an osteopath; he's almost 50; he went to college at night, working during the day to pay his fees. there is no such thing as being past it; only if you let yourself be.
Life is so rich and so wonderful, I hope to be doing mad things well into my 80s; I hope I will never stop learning.
It's all out there for you man, you just have to find it again.
2007-02-25 09:03:50 · answer #2 · answered by marie m 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel.
at age 40 life is definately at least half over (not many live past 80)
at this age we all have a tendency to want what we had in our youth in an attempt to somehow try and regain what we once had.
Like you, when I was younger, I went everywhere, and did everything, I've been around the world, visited 45 or so states, and at least 25 different countries. but now I too am 40, and really wish I never started a family, because I also yearn for what I once had, FREEDOM
what you need is a fantastic sexual encounter, yes im saying cheat. go out and find one person to do you like you have never been done before, this will not only make you feel better emotionally, but will ease alot of those aches and pains that come with being older.
2007-02-25 09:03:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
At the risk of sounding cliched, life is what you make it! It is true that the 40's does seem to be where people feel that they are in a rut. If you have recently changed jobs you feel that there is no stability, and if you're in the same one you feel trapped. Many of my friends are in that situation. However, others just seem insistent on living life to the full. The two friends I respect most are both much older than me. One is 81, she only stopped being a yoga teacher 2 years ago. A widow, she is continually going abroad to catch up with old friends and to try new experiences and to see more of the world. Another is 63. He is always so busy that he puts my social calendar to shame. and he is still fit and healthy and swims, plays tennis, goes for long walks as well as working, going to concerts, plays and films, plans to do a Masters course from interest etc etc. I look to them as examples of hope mainly because I don't want to feel stuck in a rut or that life has no meaning later in my life. Maybe, if you feel that life has become meaningless you need to make a big change.
2007-02-25 08:56:52 · answer #4 · answered by lianhua 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if I was in your shoes I would do exactly the same.
Why do we have to grow up?
I tell my kids I wasn't born this age I was a kid too!!
I have to tell you I had my second child when I was
41 and I felt like a kid then.
Package hols seem a long way off.
I know one thing - if I were you I would take myself
off and do a Shirley Valentine. Sitting on a Greek
beach sipping my wine and looking at the sun and
wait for a handsome waiter ask me if I want one -
another glass of wine that is!!)
You never know - it could put your marriage back
on track. Good Luck and Be Happy.
2007-02-25 08:57:25 · answer #5 · answered by Minxy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GET OUT OF BED AND MAKE THINGS HAPPEN.
I'm nearly 48 and am enjoying life to the max. I was divorced after 22 yrs of marriage and suddenly had to do things for myself. I realised that there is a whole world out there. I can please myself what I do, without the whingeing husband. You will find a lot of single men and women in their 40s doing the same thing. I go on holidays with friends and it couldn't be better. You need to grow out of your Queen/Robbie phase and look for more interests, which are achievable. Make more friends and broaden your outlook.
Get motivated and get a life.
Good luck.
2007-02-25 09:46:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My mum would go mad if she heard you say that, of course they are not all like that. Most people have settled down and had family's so obviously you are not going to go back packing round the world, that is what your 20's are for. Life is what you make of it, It sounds to me like most of your issues are with your marriage, if all of your friends are settled down and want to do 'boring' things then why don't you try and meet single people that might be up for what you have in mind. Mid 40's isn't old you should be enjoying your self now, make the break from your marriage and get out there, who says you have to be friends with people your own age too, get in with some younger people if they offer more excitement for you. Good luck
2007-02-25 08:58:27 · answer #7 · answered by jo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's a saying 'Life begins at 40'. You don't say if you've any children, but I'd suggest that you class yourself as single again, and if you want to go coast to coast, or follow a band, go ahead! Just because the people you know are stuck in a rut doesn't mean you have to be....go out and enjoy yourself again and do your own thing!
Good luck!
2007-02-25 09:05:11 · answer #8 · answered by reader19492003 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm 45 and I don't feel that my life is over. However, for some people, that's when things start happening to their bodies. Eye problems, bifocals and other health issues start emerging and we are told it's from getting older, so some people just sit back and give up when they hear the word old. But I think it's all in the mind. My brother is almost 50 and he acts like he is in his mid 20's! I keep telling him to grow up!
2007-02-25 08:59:21 · answer #9 · answered by Pom♥Mom Spay and Neuter 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you're similar to those sad gits you see on 'Ten Years Younger' which is shown on Channel 4.
I'm 41 years old now. I still go out pubbing and clubbing. My girlfriend is only aged 23 and believe me as far as I'm concerned I'm still a young person.
In fact a few weeks ago somebody told me that they didn't think I was a day older than 28!
If only you had looked after yourself when you were younger, ie. no drugs, no sunbathing without suntan lotion, no excessive drinking, then perhaps you wouldn't look like a has been by now!
2007-02-25 09:03:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes me. I will turn 44 in April and what really hurt the most was about 5 years ago when a popular song in the '80's came on and after it was done they said it was classical music and my girls agreed with them! They are 18 and 17 now and I thought they would always need me now they do anything to spite me. And I really don't wanna talk about my marriage. Let's just say I agree with you on that one too!
2007-02-25 08:54:30 · answer #11 · answered by Doris D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋