I am married and last year I had an affair. My wife found out about it about a month ago (not through my admission) but has suspected ever since it was going on. She has been all over me for months. Mean and suspicious and completely jealous about everything. Now that she knows the truth she is still suspicious and thinks I am still leaving stuff out and lying. She's acting like a nut job. Is this normal?
2007-02-23 22:49:17 · 26 answers · asked by thisguy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes it is and you're lucky she didn't get a gun and shoot you.
2007-02-23 22:52:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You betrayed her trust. If you want the marriage to work you're going to have to win her trust back. This doesn't happen overnight, it could take months or even years. You're going to have to prove that your are being honest with her as much as you can. After all you're obviously not an honorable man when it comes to fidelity and honesty. You ran the marriage off the road and it's your job to fix it. That is if you have the balls. I find most men that cheat just want it swept under the rug with no repercussions. Their way of thinking is it's over so what's the big deal. Well it may be over for you, but, she lives with it every day. The self doubt and finding out your husband is not who you thought he was haunts her. She thinks about it every day. Get some couselling.
2007-02-24 07:09:27 · answer #2 · answered by mjm52 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's normal..you cheated on your wife! It's not like it was a "small" lie...She doesn't trust you. You will have to earn that trust back. Just don't expect her to "get over it" and act like everything is cool. It doesn't work like that. If it were reversed wouldn't you be asking questions? If you want to save your marriage, you must answer all her questions and reassure her that you love her. Just deal with it until she feels comfortable again. It's the small price you have to pay.
2007-02-24 07:00:18 · answer #3 · answered by You Don't Know Me! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally normal!
You have given her every right to feel confused, angry, jealous, mean, nutty, and everything else. If you are unhappy with this result, you have only yourself to blame.
This will not go away without working on it. There is a lot of damage here that needs repair. She cannot do it alone, and if you are angry and impatient with her through this then it will never get any better.
2007-02-24 07:01:32 · answer #4 · answered by Bearess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO its not normal, normal would have been kicking your butt out and taking half of everything you own. count your blessings, be glad she is around to be a nut job. then get over yourself and understand that you are the one who screwed up not her, and deal with the consequences of your actions. when my now ex wife cheated on me she told me. she at least had that respect, and she dealt with the fallout. there were just to many problems to fix. but if this is the only one, it is time to go to counseling, you are lucky because she really loves you and is willing to give you a second chance, but you have to earn back that trust.
2007-02-24 07:10:05 · answer #5 · answered by big_john_719 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
"She's acting like a nut job." Dear god.
Given that you don't seem to be showing the slightest remorse and indeed seem more brassed off that you got found out than anything, is it any wonder that she doesn't trust you? If you want to work things out with your wife, then start trying to. I suspect some big time grovelling and eating humble pie will be required. If you don't, then leave.
2007-02-24 06:55:08 · answer #6 · answered by pompeii 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yes
2007-02-24 06:57:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, and you're being an insensitive pr1ck.
Count on getting a lawyer in the near future and the wonderful world of financial ruin. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...and you have done a heck of a job!
Get counselling...or a lawyer...and keep your pecker in your pants.
2007-02-24 07:20:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i can't say it is abnormal to react to a cheating husband this way. u need to be honest, own up to your wrong, be sorry and remorseful, cause she knows it, no use trying to lie out of it, maturity comes when we make ourselves accountable for what we did, not try to hide it. u need to acknowledge and be sorry for the hurt u have caused your wife, if your not there can never be any forgiveness here. u caused this it is up to u to fix it, if your truly sincere about reconnecting to your wife. as u can't just expect her to begin trusting u again, and act as if nothing happened.
2007-02-24 06:56:29 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She isn't acting like a nut you should not have went outside your marriage and committed adultry she oughta just throw your tail out and file for a divorce.
2007-02-24 06:56:17 · answer #10 · answered by Denny O 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
its not normal behaviour but if you hadnt cheated she wouldnt be reacting like this,because you have cheated its made her suspicious and do you blame her,what if the shoe was on the other foot!!!!
2007-02-24 07:44:21 · answer #11 · answered by claire 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋