My boyfriend and I live together and we have a son.I stay at home to take care of things while my bf goes to school every fri-mon. Last year, a problem occur with my family(my parents and siblings) and I felt really depress.My bf was aware of that.now, everytime he goes to school (he has to stay there from fri-mon without coming home because it is too far) I feel really alone. Suicide cross my mind but then...I'm a God-fearing person. Nobody really knows how I feel.All the pain and hurt inside. I tried telling him but he doen't take it seriously. Adding injury to my depression is that I'm constantly thinking if he's cheating on me.
2007-02-23 22:26:07 · 16 answers · asked by spoiled_rotten_gurl18 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Perhaps you're suffering from depression that sometimes occurs after one gives birth or a hormonal imbalance or you're just having trouble dealing with the situation you're in -- isolated from family (it sounds like), spending too much time alone (or with people too young to hold a conversation with) and not enough to keep you busy and fulfilled yourself. You're heading straight for disaster and an end to your relationship if you don't get a grasp on it immediately. Go see a doctor and see if he can give you something to help you temporarily with your depression -- and then get out and start doing things --- helping others is the best way to get out of depression -- or take a part time job .... it sounds like you have too much time on your hands -- and depression is a much more common occurrence than it used to be - and the best help of all is reaching out to God -- you'll get such a sense of peace and purpose like no other.
2007-02-23 22:53:01 · answer #1 · answered by GrnEyedBlondeSwede 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know your bf and your age so i can have an idea, if you too are mature enough to handle this problem if your bf is too far from school why not move closer to his school or look for the school that is closer to your place i hope you two have a better options
regarding the distance and place,living by yourself is very hard is there any relatives on both sides of your family that you can talk to and shares your feeling what happens when there is an emergency who you can turn to
if there is a will there is a way
2007-02-23 22:51:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were a lover before you were a mother...despite popular belief.
As for sharing what you feel with your boyfriend, he doesn't 'just listen' to well. All men are the same, it's nothing agaist them! Men are fixers. Your boyfriend can't fix your depresstion. He does take it seriously, but you aren't talking to him the right way. When you talk about things that hurt you, all men want to be there to fix it, and make that pain go away. Since that pain is in your heart, he can't really do anything to make it go away. I think you should dump a little bit of thise, the listening aspect of it at least, on a girlfriend. Once you get out the emtional side of it, then you can bring the logical "I feel depressed because my mother is ill (as an example)" to the table, and your boyfriend can "fix" that. (like, he can console you better, look up the details of her illness, take you to see her, explane what is happening to her, and offer his shoulder for you to cry on ect..)
As for cheating, you don't have any real grounds for it, so stop thinking it. Whatever the mind thinks, the heart feels. Simple as that. Trust me, I know he's not. But if you aren't being nice to him (because when you are nice during depresstion, it just magicaly goes away!!) then he's not going to be loving to you. So, stop sobbing (its alright though, women cry) go to your boyfriend, explane to him that you just want to snuggle and cry (since he can do that..men are doers remember!!!) and remind him how him letting you be near hi m makes you feels better (because cring in our man's arms does ease the pain..no matter how great..)
2007-02-23 22:46:36 · answer #3 · answered by Pandora 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ideas and your thoughts are your biggest enemy. Do not blame him. If he is not making it at home then bear patience. Imagine how would he feel if you tell him that you want to commit suicide because he is not with you. That would upset and him..If you feel he is cheating on you then dont get upset and take wrong decisions. Life has its own ways and means. When he is with you entertain him in the best possible way or ask him how would he want to be treated..The gap is there because his needs are not met. Life is supply and demand or give and take..If you want to succeed then you must draw a plan..Use those lonely hours to draw ideas that would fetch success. He will show interest if it is of HIS INTEREST. So be bold and ask him his likes and dislikes again..tastes change as age changes. Try it...You will see success. Rate me, if you find my advice suitable.
2007-02-23 22:35:27 · answer #4 · answered by california_beach_boyz 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to focus on your life with your son foremost and seek counseling for your depression. Find a therapist out of the phone book, they will help you. Go see your regular medical doctor and they will give you medication to help curb that depression. I did and I felt better within a couple of days.
You also need to talk to your b/f. See where this relationship is headed.
What about you? Are you working? Going to school? Get back into something. When you are busy it helps.
Here are some tips on how to deal with stress:
www.helpguide.org
2007-02-23 22:47:29 · answer #5 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
May be you should keep yourself busy. Aside from taking care of the house and your son, what hobbies are you interested in? Are you into sports? Find time to do things which interested you. Do you have friends whom you can pour out your depression? Try talking to them. Stop thinking negative things about your boyfriend. Be positive.
2007-02-23 22:45:58 · answer #6 · answered by Sabrina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go tell your doctor about your feelings and maybe join a group for people with depression it is a serious disease and the way you feel should not be taken lightly. Look after yourself have some me time do something that makes you happy.
2007-02-23 22:37:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i sincerely dont know how to answer your question but why should i be the one to rack my brains just to give the right answer there are millions of people in the sea and it aint empty without me did you ever listen to techno tic tac toe it says dont count on a person for an answer instead look for possible solutions from the given question someday you might get the answer and might recieve nobel awards when thy question is as same as that of lucy lui.....but then therez a downside to this story in search of your quest if you are unable to get the answer you did not have to count on any invalid source you can try googling
in no means to answer your question i am quitting smoking because it is injurious to my health
,,,,,,and one more thing i am not giving you a classical approach of the subject of nonsense
2007-02-23 22:43:10 · answer #8 · answered by george grohan mendal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
phone a help line for advice and go to your doctors sounds like your truly depressed chuck when you start feeling better find either some hobbies or a little part-time job meet new friends and pamper yourself take time out for you be a little selfish for yourself now and then good luck and remember there's always something better coming your way everyday is different:)
2007-02-23 22:35:13 · answer #9 · answered by clare w 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget the boyfriend for right now and concentrate on you!! You need to talk to someone who can help you through this depression - and if you can't do it for yourself, then do it for your son! Do you really want him to grow up knowing his mom made a conscious decidion to kill herself and leave him alone? You don't sound like that kind of person, so please, get some help! Call a crisis line, see your family doctor or go to your church and talk to someone there!
Once you get yourself straight, then you can deal with the boyfriend!
Good luck!
Aloha!
2007-02-23 22:35:47 · answer #10 · answered by gabriel_demus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋