can some one please help me my head is diong over time & last night i took a over dose she says she loves me & wants me but just wants a bit of fun has well ?????????
2007-02-23 22:21:57 · 14 answers · asked by roy m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Are you sick in the head?
2007-02-23 22:49:19 · answer #1 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not worth attempting to kill or injure yourself over, however much you love her.
In her mind, she is not really being unfaithful because she wants to sleep with other women. To her this isn't a problem because it doesn't involve a man.
To you it is, as the thought of her having sexual satisfaction elsewhere is a blow to your image of yourself as a man. It isn't as though you can even compete, as you aren't a woman.
Firstly - her desires to sleep with women are no reflection on you as a man or as a person.
Secondly - fidelity is obviously important to you. It isn't to her.
Whether she has sexual relations with another man or a woman, it is infidelity in your eyes (and in the eyes of most people).
Thirdly - if she knew that she was bi sexual before marriage it was unfair of her not to have told you so that you would be able to make a decision at that stage.
If she has recently discovered these feelings for women, that is another thing altogether.
Only you know what the deal breaker is for your marriage.
Perhaps you need to take some time away from her and really think through what would make you happy and secure in the long term.
If you cannot bear to be with someone who 'just wants a bit of fun' then you will probably have to end the marriage.
Good luck - and get some help as you need it. There is no shame in that. You need some support.
2007-02-24 01:42:00 · answer #2 · answered by Sun is Shining ❂ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh babe, I'm sorry. My heart goes for you.
It's definitely not the ideal situation.
It's obviously something which goes against your beliefs, moral, and does hurt being a loving husband.
It would hurt anybody for that matter.
She is being selfish whichever way she puts it. She wants her cake and eat it.
I mean, ok, she's telling you and not running the risk of you finding out which would hurt possibly more.
Still, it puts you in an impossibly situation.
She wants your blessing to be able to cheat on you, and who know what else she might have in mind, once you'd have accepted her view.
The right thing for her to do if she really had genuine feelings for you would have been to leave you, and then try to explain, by giving you some space.
Coming clean just like that is not supposed to help you, only to make you feel guilty and compelled to think well of her.
She should have thought harder about your feelings and also giving you more space to make a decision.
You may think that I'm blaming her, that I don't understand, that it's easy for me to say, but being outside the situation, I have nothing to gain out of it.
All I see is a poor guy who's going to be dragged into some sinister lifestyle he never dreamt of if he allows it.
See what it already drove you to do.
Should you hear that from someone asking for help, I bet you'd be the first one to say:"Mate, walk away while you can. And try and start afresh. And if there are children, take them with you!"
It's not to say that she's bad for making those choice, it's just the weakness of also asking you to bear the responsibilities for them.
Maybe it's an age crisis she's going through, but you can't be responsible for her. She's not your child.
Good luck babe, and take care of yourself.xxx
2007-02-24 02:52:09 · answer #3 · answered by Kc 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's tough I know. You have committed to this woman and the thought of her being with some one else is hard to swallow(even if it is with another woman). You need to be honest with her and let her know that you should be enough for her. Hopefully you are taking care of business in that department. She could be saying that to get your attention too. There are ways to have a extra fun in a relationship than bringing other people int it. Good luck and I hope this helps
2007-02-24 02:27:42 · answer #4 · answered by CJ5fan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Roy
I've just noticed that you have posted this question several times. I have responded to one of your questions. As a bi female all I can say is calm down, don't get stressed out. It sounds like she certainly sees you as the love of her life. She would just probably enjoy being with other women for fun.
2007-02-23 23:05:55 · answer #5 · answered by Ella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do not like that she is bi sexual then leave her. She should of told you this before you two got married. No woman on earth is worth dying over.
2007-02-24 10:34:57 · answer #6 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At least she isn't cheating with another man, look on the positive side, if she still loves you it may improve your love life & if your lucky enough you may get to join in some time.......
sorry if this dosent help you
2007-02-24 08:40:49 · answer #7 · answered by endac 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, one guy, two girls? I thought every man dreamed of that. You must be different, so if this is something she has hidden from you, divorce her. That is major, and grounds for a clean getaway
2007-02-23 22:55:26 · answer #8 · answered by Ponyboy99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know its hard but you need to give yourself some time with this situation why not join in with her with another woman you might like it and it will satisfy her needs as well but if you dont think you could live with this you need to get out good luck
2007-02-25 00:09:15 · answer #9 · answered by sha23z 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should of told you before you got married she is still cheating even tho its with another woman..It's up to you but you don't sound like you can handle it so split up..
2007-02-24 03:13:14 · answer #10 · answered by londonletch 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What you have is every mans dream Ask if you can watch and also join in. If you dont want to watch I will be happy to.
2007-02-23 23:46:31 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋