My boyfriend has been so stressed out these days about his job. He's been feeling very low. He had a fight with his boss as his boss refused to promote him and in his job the only way forward is to be promoted. He works till evenings and in the meantime he goes for interviews in the lunch time looking for a new job. He spends his evenings and weekends preparig himself for these interviews. He's actually going for 2 big interviews near my city in 2 weeks time so we can see each other more often. He told me yesterday that we will meet each other in 2 weeks. He told he needs time to focus and he warned me he may be less available for me until then but I have not been able to leave him alone. I have become needy and I told him yesterday that I dont feel special and I feel like we're loosing each other. I feel neglected. He told me that I dont support him and he said he tried to explain to me many times he needs some time to focus as it's hard for him. He became upset with me.
2007-02-23 21:31:56 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hey!
You will need to get busy with OTHER projects..so that he can do the very stressful things that he needs to do! Finding a job, is NO Picnic! It IS highly stressful...you need to back off for now..get somethings done, for yourself...you need to go out with other friends...go shopping and "treat yourself" to just being with others and what is called "you time"....that isn't such a horrible thing.!!!..Do you honestly want to "push" him out of your life? Because that is what is going to happen..if you do not stop being sooo needy!!!
I have been there..a long time ago...and I know a friend of mine that is sooo needy that she bothers her boyfriend constantly..to the point where they have nearly broken up, three major times..and then she pushes and lectures him all of the time..(I felt sorry for him!!!)
Be an adult here..and get your act together...be kind..and leave him alone...and do fun things for you....take care of the wonderful person that you truly are...you do not need him to take care of you all of the time!! be with good friends...do things for yourself for a change...have some "freedom" for a while!!!
You will enjoy it...and ya know what? You still have somebody who likes you very much....don't blow this!!!
2007-02-23 21:42:47 · answer #1 · answered by Rivka 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi, i know that u may be feeling neglected. its normal to feel taht way. but u urself has said that ur bf is very stressed out these days. u r not loosing each other. he is going through a hard time. he did just lash out at you or shower all his frustraqtions upon you. instead he has told u frankly tht he is trying to get a big boost in career and he may not be as available to u as he was earlier. hasnt he been really considerate in that. he didnt just heap up all his anger and resentment over you, which men usually do. so try to understand his position. it is only natural taht he is upset with u. he told u his position frankly since he thought that you will understand him and comfort him. have u been able to do so?he needs u for strenghth and support. give him taht. he will then understand that u will be with him always throught thick and thin.he needs a new job and he needs to prepare for it. u should be supporting him in this. help him to face the interview and give him courage. fterall, it is important for u too that he should make it big in his career, right? in future, both of u are going to be togetehr, right? so just relax. apologize to him, tell him how much concerend u r abt his career and how confidsent u r in him. he will no longer be upset wiht u . he will apreciate it genuinely. have a nice day. good luck to u two
2007-02-24 05:47:36 · answer #2 · answered by lilac4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He loves u actually cos he wanan find a job near ur city so can meet u often... but he too, should arrange his time to be with u... even if it is 1 hour or 2 hours.. i totall understand ur feelings as i experience b4... but wat to do? If u wanna be a good gf, u have to tolerate and be patience... though u can't meet each other often but u stil call him... to hear his voice is better than none... think of the future... if he finds a good job with higher pay... it is good for u in future too right? Now, sacrifice a little is a must... if not u won't get better life with him in future... ask yourself... do u want a better life with him?
2007-02-24 05:46:34 · answer #3 · answered by WaiYee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you hope to share your future with this man then you need to let him straighten himself out....being unhappy in your job is so stressful. He does not need the extra stress of entertaining and reassuring you.
I'm sure that you have let friendships slide during this relationship if you cannot cope for two weeks without his full attention, DO SOMETHING TO CHANGE that, nobody likes to feel that cossetted,
Dont lose sight of the woman he fell for....and do not become dependent on him for providing your happiness...you have to be better than that..it is hard..trust me i'm being real because i had to find out the hard way.
I have since turned in to the girl who can and will put a partner on hold to straighten myself out...u gota love urself before you can love another. Let him do this.
Good luck
2007-02-27 18:22:20 · answer #4 · answered by Scarlett write 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to trust him and give him his time away. He's obviously trying to make some big changes in his life. Just let him be. You'll see him in 2 weeks. In the meanwhile, do something to take your mind off him. Use this time to catch up with friends or do something you've always wanted to do. You could plan something special for when you meet with your boyfriend in two weeks.
2007-02-24 05:43:03 · answer #5 · answered by Mary 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Right now he needs that space...the future lasts for longer than now.
What you call 'need' is actually 'want'
Try to be a little less selfish
He needs support now, not pressure
2007-02-24 07:44:19 · answer #6 · answered by alan h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to understand him for now...at least he gave a reasonable excuse if he become out of reach when you try to call or want to see him..... he is doing it for his growth and you'll never know the pot in the end of the rainbow will be his and yours...aight........
2007-02-26 18:08:54 · answer #7 · answered by President Of D' Clan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get over yourself! He is trying to better himself and you are to stupid not to notice!!! Do you have to be the center of attention all the time??
2007-02-24 05:43:34 · answer #8 · answered by LanternPrime 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's trying to find a better job so he can be closer to you, he does love you, just wait he'll be back X
2007-02-24 05:36:09 · answer #9 · answered by Pat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋