should I get a DNA test anyway?

Question

my gf told me that she was pregnant and she dint know if the baby was mine, so after she went to the doctor, and they told her how many weeks she was. she tells me that shes 100% sure its mine. but I last time we slept I remember her taking her pill, and after that we fell out for a few weeks, but doing that time she was talking to someone from her job and they ended up sleeping together (or as she puts it he took advantage of her and she dint report it as rap I guess anything after 9:00pm don't count)
so now she mad because I don't believe her and she gets upset when I told her I still would like a DNS test just to be sure.
she said I should just believe her!
I feel guilty at some points I'm not trying to deny the baby (such a cute) but I would like to know if its truly mines and she don't get how I feel about it.
so do you think I have a good reason to get a DNA test ?

thank you all for the great responses,
I really do like the baby it would be my first child, and Ive tried to tell her, I'm not denying the baby I just want to be sure and to get the stress of wondering if it is or not mines,I want to bond closer but, the feeling is still there I even looked for my features of me on the baby and i don't see it, even tho I know that it don't mean nothing. I just don't want to be hurt and hunted later on.
I would love my child but im not sure what to do about the mother her attitude is not going to change and I want a positive environment for my child.

Answer 1

ALWAYS have a DNA test...ALWAYS!!

Answer 2

I think you have good reason to request a DNA test... Your girlfriend can be 100% sure all she wants to be but the only way to prove you're the baby's father is to take the test... it's just a simple swab of the cheek and you'll get the results in a month. If you are the father than great- you already want to be involved... but that can also bear legal ramifications- if you have another falling out she can legally file for child support. If you're not the father then well, whatever- if you want to be there for the child that's very aimiable of you... but you won't be obligated finacially to the child should you and then mother have another falling out- unless you get married at which point you would become a legal guardian- and would have to pay child support post divorce or anything like that... Another route would be to formally adopt the child if he/she ends up not being yours- but again that will legally tie you to the baby and you'd have to pay child support if you and the Mom split...

It's up to you- do you want to be responsible and have legal obligations to the child (or possibly find out you have no obligations to the child legally) or do you just want to leave things how they are?

I think your girlfriend needs to take a step back and reevaluate the situation- your request is reasonable since there was another encounter during your time apart... the time frame the Dr. gave your girlfriend for conception is an ESTIMATE and can be off by as little as a few days or as musch as a few weeks!

Good luck to you!

Answer 3

I wouldn't feel guilty, it's not a matter of denying the baby, it's a matter of wanting the best for the baby. She can not say with 100% certainty that the baby is yours unless there was a month or more between her encounter with you and this other person. If it's any close than that, a test needs to be done so that child will be able to know with absolute surety who the biological father is. As for the birth control, it doesn't only work, it's 99% effective when taken correctly...which is when it's taken at the exact same time every day. Otherwise it's less effective. It's also less effective in women 150lbs. and over. And even if she took it correctly, there's a chance of pregnancy any time you engage in sexual activity. If she's getting mad about it, she knows she's not as sure as she says she is and she afraid it will proove to be the other man's. Don't feel guilty. You have every right to push this issue.

Answer 4

The Answer is YES. Sometimes doctors can be off on the dates of conception by a couple of weeks. A friend of mine has just found out that his 3 year old daughter does not actually belong to him. His wife never even thought to tell him that she could belong to someone else. Now he is in the middle of a nasty divorce and even worse has formed a bond with this little girl only to discover she does not belong to him. It's a terribly upsetting for everyone involved. Do the DNA test (you can get a court order if necessary) Do yourself and the baby a favour, find out now before things get even more complicated. And if you love your gf and the baby (no matter who it ends up belonging to) make sure you tell your gf that, and reassure her that you will stick by her no matter what the outcome. Good Luck

Answer 5

The fact is she slept with another person. Your wanting to know is not from a lack of trust but in knowledge that she did sleep with another. Though she is a hundred percent unfortunately it sounds like it was to close for comfort and you knowing will put your mind at ease. I'm sure you would love that child no matter what but, I can see where you are coming from and so you know I am a female. That is just like if my hubby had been snipped (of course this is just hypothetical) and I got pregnant (though I would not think of sleeping with another) during that time. Although, I would be hurt because he might think the child was not his (so thought I was cheating), I could not be angry because his reasons are legit. I am 17 weeks pregnant with our first child. The situation is difficult. Ask yourself though if this would change things or if your feelings for that child would change. Unfortunately though you have been with her the most, it only takes one time. Good luck, and I think both of you need to be in each others shoes. For her she needs to see why you feel that way and for you why she feels you may not trust or believe her.

Answer 6

Definitely get the test, just explain to her that you need to know for sure and if you love her. Tell her that you love her and the baby and you want to go head on in taking care of this child with absolutely no doubts.
If you dont get the test there will always be that simmering line between you three.
And don't let her hold it against you if the baby does turn out to be yours, you have good reason to want to know if this baby is yours.
She must have some inkling of a doubt if she is fighting you about it.

Answer 7

OF COURSE YOU SHOULD!! She has ABSOLUTELY NO way of knowing whose child it is and you have the right to make sure before you are suckered into signing the birth certificate and taking care of it b/c if you do that then legally you'll be the father and have to pay child support if you split up, even if later DNA tests show that you are NOT the father! She's lucky you're so understanding and even considering staying with her.

Answer 8

He can continually try, notwithstanding it gained't artwork. yet pass ahead and enable your ex imagine that it will. At maximum, the try will %. up the DNA of both your ex and his acceptable buddy and the try will come decrease back as invalid, and they're going to ought to do it lower back. yet in the journey that they commit to charm to blood for the try and forgo the swab, i ask your self in the journey that they are going to attempt a decrease back alley blood transfusion. that would favor to be thrilling. regardless of if their plans do not artwork, do you actually pick that type of drama on your (and the youngster's) life? until eventually you're truly confusing up for baby help, I hardly ever imagine paternity testing of this type is truly honestly worth the hardship. If he accepts or denies the youngster, a DNA try gained't substitute his thoughts. extra appropriate yet, you should petition the courtroom for both your ex and his acceptable buddy to take a paternity try. and prefer others have said, it really is not any longer his saliva that makes the adaptation, it really is the floor cells on the interior his mouth.

Answer 9

I had a guy that I never cheated on and never broke up with insist that the baby wasn't his. We broke up after that and he had a test. having said that... I think you should have the test. You have every right. She could be upset because she is hormonal and pregnatn. She could upset because she feels you don't trust her (even though she did have sex with someone else). Or she just wants it to be yours. Sounds like she wants it to be yours and wants you to want it to be yours. You need a test. The egg lives up to two or three day adn teh sperm longer... get the test

Answer 10

now a days im surprised more husbands arent askin even their wives for a dna test
yes get one .... you should have been able to trust her enough not to sleep with another guy after only a week or two .... get the test and be sure that this is your baby that you will be paying for for the rest of your life ...unless you would rather just pay and then at the end find out it wasnt even yours

Answer 11

yes get a dna test asap it's nice to know if the baby is yours so you can step and take care of your responsibility and nice to know if someone is trying to pull something over your head. so yeah get that dna test and if your girlfriend trys to talk you out of it tell her your not changing your mind on the subject and that you want to be defintely sure this baby is yours. also if she has nothing to hide or not one ounce of doubt the baby is yours she will take the test if she refuses then you know what the deal is. good luck!!!!!!!