I'm sort of old fashioned, while i'm not sure I want children i do know that it's a good possiblity one day and I know that I do want to get married. The man that i'm currently with, and have been with for some time does not really ever want to get married and NEVER wants to have kids. He has diabetes and doesn't want to pass it to his children, so adoption would be his only option and he's told me that he's not even sure he would want that. So I know that staying with him would mean no kids and likely no marriage.
I do love him, but these things are also important to me. I understand his desire to not pass on illness to his kids, or as he puts it causing them to suffer but it still makes me a bit disheartened.
... basically i don't know how to feel about this.
2007-02-23 17:20:57 · 8 answers · asked by attila 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would have a heart to heart chat with him about what you want out of life and what he wants and if he's not really to meet you in the middle anywhere then you have to choose to go on together with only his life plan or separate and go with your own plan.
2007-02-23 19:27:05 · answer #1 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should feel and understand that he doesn't want this ill ness to go to his children but if he doesn't even want children then whats the point.and are you sure this isn't a excuse I mean the illness doesn't always have to go on to the children.so it could be an excuse of not having children.
2007-02-24 01:28:56 · answer #2 · answered by kiran 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're obviously not ready to make a decision yet. Keep thinking. And keep your options open...try to think if you love this man enough to be with him forever without marriage or kids...as I said, you don't sound like you're ready yet; however, sooner or later, it'll come to you one way or the other!!!!
2007-02-24 01:31:46 · answer #3 · answered by avechm 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should always go for what is important to you. if you want to get married, you should be with someone who eventually wants to be married. and you also should be with someone who isn't sure they want kids or not, someone who has same points of view as you on the future.
good luck!
2007-02-24 01:26:36 · answer #4 · answered by jpcjulia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't wont kids either but now that I have 6 of them I wouldn't know what to do with out them.
2007-02-24 01:28:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is not the man for you. Do you think he will eventually change his mind? He won't. I know you love him, but you are wasting your time wishing he will change, he won't. You have to move on, I am sorry. It will be for your own good.
2007-02-24 02:52:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to think about what other things you have in common and if the good out weighs the bad.
2007-02-24 01:58:41 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Basically, he only cares about what HE wants. If he loved you, he would do the opposite.
2007-02-24 01:31:00 · answer #8 · answered by OC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋