"I believe that if the incoming freshman class read—or reread The Catcher in the Rye, they would gain a better sense of self, and they would benefit from knowing that they’re joined in their mindset by at least one other great character, that character being Holden Caulfield—the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst."
If it is, how do I fix it? Thanks!
2007-02-23 14:41:10 · 17 answers · asked by doubled254 3 in Education & Reference ➔ Words & Wordplay
Yes, I do believe that this is a run-on and there is some bad grammar in there as well here is how I think it should look:
I believe that if the incoming freshman class read- or reread "The Catcher in the Rye", they would gain a better sense of themselves. They would benefit from knowing that they're joined in their mindset by at least one other great character, that being Holden Caulfield, the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst.
I think that this is darn close to being right and I really hope that this will help you out!
2007-02-23 14:49:20 · answer #1 · answered by trail_2_eagle09 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks fine to me, but its gettin' really complex. Looks like you have 2 or 3 ideas here, and you should put them into 2 or 3 sentences. You do have a grammatical error in the 1st 4 words, though. Make sure to distinguish the title of the book. Make sure not to use contractions. If you only have one character, only say that you have one character. Try something like, "I believe that the incoming freshman class should read or reread 'The Catcher in the Rye'. They would gain a greater sense of self, and they would benefit from knowing that they are joined in their mindset by at least one other great character, like Holden Caulfield. He is the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst." I hope this helps. Don't use that exact sentence, because I don't think its the best that there is. Besides, you would have to cite me in a bibliography. ; ) Good luck.
2007-02-23 22:54:03 · answer #2 · answered by pish_01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,,,, put a period after self. Start next sentence with They....
You may want it to read.
I believe if the incoming freshman class read-- or reread " The Catcher in the Rye." they might gain a better sense of self. They may benefit from knowing they're joined in their mindset by at least one other great character, Holden Cauifield, the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst.
2007-02-23 22:51:39 · answer #3 · answered by sushihen2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that if the incoming freshman class read or reread " The Catcher in the Rye", they would gain a better sense of self. They would also benefit from knowing that they are joined in their mindset by at least one other great character. That character being Holden Caulfield,the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst.
2007-02-23 22:49:48 · answer #4 · answered by ruth4526 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is run-on. How about, "I believe that if the incoming freshman class read - or reread - The Catcher in the Rye, they would gain a better sense of self. In that achievement, they would be joining at least one great literary character; Holden Caulfield, the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst."?
2007-02-23 22:48:54 · answer #5 · answered by neniaf 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, it's too long. Try "I believe that if the incoming freshmen class were to read 'The Cather in the Rye,' they would gain a better sense of self. They could benefit from knowing they are joined in their mindset by at least one great character. Holden Caulfield shows the tmeless embodiment of the teenage yearning and angst."
I've never read the book, so im not exactly sure if that would be right, but you can add or take out some words to make it work. Just try to keep your sentences a little shorter, to keep the reader with you.
2007-02-23 22:47:45 · answer #6 · answered by Hmmm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just take out the first 'and' (I've also trimmed a few more words and repunctuated):
"I believe that if the incoming freshman class read—or reread—The Catcher in the Rye, they would gain a better sense of self. They would benefit from knowing that they’re joined in their mindset by at least one other great character: Holden Caulfield, the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst."
2007-02-23 22:47:06 · answer #7 · answered by hot.turkey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's a run-on... it's just GOES on and on. Split it into two sentences (and take out some words to eliminate the factor of wordiness) I'm not sure what to do with the entire "timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst" phrase... I don't think it fits. Here it goes:
I believe that if the incoming freshman class read The Catcher in the Rye, they would gain a better sense or self. They would benefit from knowing that they're joined in their mindset by at least one great character, Holden Caulfield.
2007-02-23 22:46:05 · answer #8 · answered by Squeegee Beckingheim :-) 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes
"I believe that if the incoming freshman class read—or reread The Catcher in the Rye, they would gain a better sense of self. *They (The Freshman Class) would benefit from knowing that they’re joined in their mindset by at least one other great character, that character being Holden Caulfield—the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst
2007-02-23 22:45:45 · answer #9 · answered by Lilly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is pretty long... and since you aren't sure, you might want to make it two or three sentences.
I believe that if the incoming freshman class read—or reread The Catcher in the Rye, they would gain a better sense of self. They would also benefit from knowing that they’re joined in their mindset by at least one other great character, that character being Holden Caulfield—the timeless embodiment of teenage yearning and angst
2007-02-23 22:45:25 · answer #10 · answered by ... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋