What is wrong with a person who feels the need to continually stir up the sh!t pot? They broach a subject or make a comment or accusation that they know good and well will either make you uncomfortable or piss you off, and then when you get upset, they laugh about it. If you press it, they say that you must be the one with the problem, or you must be guilty of something, etc., or you wouldn't be so upset or defensive. It ends up where they come out looking like the innocent party, and you are the perpetrator.
I hate this, and I don't know how to diffuse it before it starts. I'm afraid that if I can't come to grips with it or find a better way to handle it, I'm going to have to cut this person out of my life in order to maintain my own sense of well-being.
Any insight or feedback you could offer would be SO appreciated!
2007-02-23 13:10:06 · 3 answers · asked by spun up's evil inner child 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Sadly, it sounds rather normal to me.
2007-02-24 06:10:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever considered directly asking them why they do that? Confronting them may help - they might not realize that what they are doing is so frustrating - this could be why they laugh when you get frustrated... Confronting people about their problems sucks, but it could help.
You could also try changing the subject when they do this, or just try not to get upset. If they are just trying to get a rise out of you, not reacting might cause them to lose interest.
Some people are just like that. If nothing works, you should ask yourself how important their friendship is to you. If you can't live without them, then you will have to try to deal with it. If they are "expendable" as a friend, then you should just move on if they can't change their behaviour.
2007-02-25 13:40:29 · answer #2 · answered by Occam's Pitbull 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yikes, control is the issue
2007-02-27 16:58:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋