How do I not let this affect my job?

Question

I am really down about my job. I have been told how impressive my performance is and felt good about the work I was doing. I work with a partner on some tasks and as she is new I have helped her out alot. I just found out that she is being nominated for an award. I have been striving for this honour all year. I was not nominaed. I feel resentful of all the help I have given her and now question my abilities at my job. I have worked many years to get my degree and work at least 30 overtime hours a week. I put all I have into my work and now I am questioning all of it. What can I do to not feel so down about my job and try not to let her award bother me? I was almost in tears today when I found out.

My overtime is just the nature of my job. I am a first year teacher and it comes with the territory. I chose to create the best learning experience for my students and it takes time. (We are paid salary so no ot pay)

Answer 1

Put it this way, many people who "get awards" do not get them alone. Somebody has to "give the award", and the person receiving the award must have learned UNDER somebody else, which is you.

Your rewards will come in time, especially if you are truly passionate of your work. Don't let this get in the way.

I have done many huge accomplishments in my field of work. Many are dangerous, and life threatening and have never received any recognition at all.

In case you are wondering, I am a construction worker who has been lowered into pits and sewers by ropes and cables over thousands of gallons of rushing raw sewage. I have worked in nuclear facilities and power plants where chemicals are deadly. I have known a few workers in my time, who were killed on the jobsite (do you know any at your work place). I am on top of skyscrapers and inside of subways. I am the guy inside of a 2.5 million gallon jet-fuel tank that is 1/2 full (can explode) installing level switches. I am the guy at the coal-power plant, working on 2000lb live steam line repairing welds. (I do the dirty work that most people would never do at any price.

A thankless job that I enjoy. To see an over-paid movie star get a "trophy" for an acting job anyone would love to have is almost a joke....
My job is one of the most thankless jobs.

I am a union Pipefitter. Some say I am over paid, but without workers like me, other people's lives would not be pleasureable.

Answer 2

You have let your job become the most important thing in your life. When you work that many hours, you lose any work-life balance, and your perceptions become distorted. People take you for granted if you are always available: if you are seen as donating valuable personal time to pitch in in a crisis, then others perceive it as exemplary behaviour.
It would be very tacky to say anything at work to co-workers other than to congratulate your co-worker and be publicly supportive.
You can say to your boss when it's evaluation time that you felt a bit passed-over when a newer coworker was nominated after you had spent so much extra time and effort.
Rather than feeling resentful, which will get you nowhere, take a good look at yourself. You can't change the work environment, you can only change you.
Why are you working so much overtime? Are you being compensated and need the overtime? Are you in an unhealthy work situation that they demand many unpaid hours from you? Are you not happy at home and it's easier to stay at work?
You are not being rewarded- so why are you doing this?
Change your work habits and work smarter not harder, then give the company what they pay you for. If they need extra help, ask how they will negotiate compensation. VALUE your own life and time.

Answer 3

You know, stuff happens. Is it possible that she may be doing good quality of work that just happens to be noticed? I really feel for you. And there is another side to this. Whenever I have employees that work 30 hours of OT a week, I am concerned that they are not organized, not that their job warrants that much over time or that they are a hard worker. Often the perception of hard working goes with hours, but the reality is people that work long hours are overly detail oriented or very disorganized.

Have a talk with your supervisor, ask him/her what it would take for you to be nominated for the award next year. Invite a really candid conversation about the work you are doing and what your strengths and weaknesses are.

In the end, remember the Donald Trump statement, it's not personal, it's just business.

Answer 4

I understand how you feel. Try talking to your supervisor about it, and ask if there is anything in your work or performance that is lacking/can be improved. Oftentimes, the ones who are the most consistantly productive get overlooked. People assume you don't need the motivation an award/recognition provides. The other possibility is that others are not aware of quite how much you do. You can take the temperature on that by discussing that with your boss, as well. Hope this helps.

Answer 5

This happens all the time. It's work life 101. I feel for you, really, I do. First, from the tone of your e-mail, youre a person who wears her emotions on her sleeve. My advice is to shut them down. Do not be obvious that you envy that award in any way.
There is another job out there for you if you will do the work to find it. Search as though your life depends on it. At least search like your happiness depends on it.
In the meantime, work as if you need to. Do exactly what the job requires, give the same devotion to it that you have since the first day.
And while, you do so, continue to search. Maintain good working relationships with all involved because you may want letters of recommendation later.
Hit Yahoo Hot Jobs, Career Builder and attend job fairs when you can. Do you need further education. If you decide to stay, you may get promoted as you increase your knowledge and skills, if you decide to leave, you will want the extra education to make yourself more marketable.
And I've got a secret to tell ya, the award may be hers simply because it was her turn.
Make your life outside of work count as much as the workplace.As a matter of fact, place more value on outside activities than work because ultimately, outside counts more - much more. Put another way, work relationships are 9-5, outside work relationships are longer lasting.
You can resign a job, you can't resign yourself.
(Relax, the future is yours, stay focused and do your best!)

Best!

Answer 6

I'm serious. If you really believe that you should have been nominated for this award, you REALLY need to discuss this with your boss. Many people fear bringing tough questions to their boss but do you really want to live with resentment and tremendous overtime for the next several years. Maybe there is a very good reason why you weren't nominated and you just aren't privy to the reasons.

Good luck - remember - it's just a job.

FP

Answer 7

The person who nominated her must feel she has done something to deserve this award. Are you saying she will be given an award for work you did? If that is the case you should speak up. That would be very wrong on her part to take credit for your work. If it is her work she is taking credit for then there is no reason to be upset.

Answer 8

Well think of it this way, If it wasn't for you she wouldn't be getting nothing and just think of how much she learned off you. And also remember you thought her all she knows. But awards are awards and they just tell you how good your are. SO don't let it get you down because if she wins you wins too. Sorta like it's half yours because of all the time you spent with her. So don't let it get you down because you have to remember one thing, ALl in all you will always have this one thing over her and she knows it. YOU THOUGHT HER ALL SHE KNOWS, SO everytime she talks about been nominated or about the award just smile and enjoy the feeling over her. ANd if she ever gets out of place just remind her. Don't it feel good to know.

Answer 9

If you are truly pulling your own weight at work and are happy with your efforts (although 30 hours overtimes seems a bit much, hope you are getting paid for it), you have already gotten your award in self esteem. Your efforts will be noticed eventually. Maybe she is sleeping with the boss.

Answer 10

You've got to have faith. Of course the first reaction to not getting the nomination is painful, but if you know you've been doing a good job then just keep believing in yourself and don't think about the disappointments. Your time will come.