I'm always there for all of my friends. One of them is dating a complete idiot and I'm always the one to drive over and ***** his as out and take her out for dinner and make her feel better. It just seems like I'm always doing everything for them but when it comes down to it, I honestly feel they take advantage of me. I had a complete breakdown the other day and it just seemed like no one cared. I dont know. I hate them feeling sorry for me and maybe thats why they think they shouldnt get involved. But i dunno..its really depressing and frustrating..any sugggestions on ways to let them know this?
2007-02-23 09:55:33 · 9 answers · asked by veronica 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
My opinion could be long a drawn out, but I'm going to keep this short and to the point. Honesty is the best policy. Just tell them straight up what's on your mind.
2007-02-23 10:00:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am actually in almost the same situation. It is really great that you are there for your friends. They don't realize really what they have in you. It sucks that they take advantage of you, but they will figure it out the one day that you have other commitments and aren't there. The friends dating the morons are always obnoxious because they can't see how much the new guy/girl sucks and they definitely aren't going to listen to you.
My suggestions....hm, well what have I found out about my own...the more upset you get about it, the closer they will become. Distance yourself from their relationship and try your best to keep yourself busy. Hopefully when they see that you have other things going on they won't run to you with every little thing. Sit them down and talk to them about it. A little communication and honest goes a long way between friends:) Good luck!
2007-02-23 18:10:48 · answer #2 · answered by erin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar situation. What I had to do was go cold-turkey, and stop playing into their codependent games. Even if they aren't acting maliciously, the end effect on you is that it stresses you out. True friends will not want to cause you distress. So, for instance, if your girl calls you up next week, crying about how Boy broke her heart (yet again), offer some sympathy, but don't offer to come bail her out. And don't get roped into her vague hints that she wants to get rescued, either. When you find yourself breaking down over problems that aren't even yours to begin with, it's time to stop the machine and focus on taking care of yourself. Then, if it's meant to be, you can continue your friendship with these people on your own, healthier, functional, and perhaps a bit more distant terms. Good luck!!
2007-02-23 18:04:09 · answer #3 · answered by LN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take them out to lunch and tell them that you feel as if you are always there for them, but they are never there for you. Talking to them is the best way tgo get everything out the right way. I hope this helps.
2007-02-23 18:01:21 · answer #4 · answered by please_knowimme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way anyone can take advantage of you is if you ALLOW them to. All you have to do is say "No".
2007-02-23 17:58:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
be honest with them, if they are true friends they will understand. no one likes to feel like they are taken advantage of.
2007-02-23 18:00:31 · answer #6 · answered by firefly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is their life, while you may not like it, it really is none of your business. tell them next time they call you are busy and cant help them out,,
2007-02-23 17:59:42 · answer #7 · answered by rich2481 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let them know that you'll be there for them, but it's there relationship not yours. you cant be there for everything. let them know that you'll support them but your not going to solve their every day dilemmas.
2007-02-23 18:00:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them
x actly how u feel
2007-02-23 17:59:34 · answer #9 · answered by Wanna_b_with_u...<3 ~KALA 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋