I just Googled my name and found out I have an upcoming court date because my daughter's mom is trying to legally change my daughter's last name. Had I not Googled my name, surely I wouldv'e lost by default. How can she think she can just change her name, is she smoking crack?
Here's the deal. I've been denied visitation for almost 7 years and I have a court order allowing me visitation, well that was 7 years ago. I pay my child support. Her mom is in contempt of court but who's going to enforce it?
I love my daughter and think about her often. I'm getting screwed here and it sucks! If i were a criminal, i'd get a public defender. I can't afford a lawyer for this. What a great legal system we have. What a joke.
2007-02-23 08:27:51 · 8 answers · asked by unruly_1 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
I live in Minnesota
2007-02-23 09:13:39 · update #1
Hey BarB,
You don't know the facts... How dare you say that.
2007-02-23 10:30:58 · update #2
It depends on the state you are in. Every jurisdiction has differences in the laws. It is very difficult to give a correct answer not knowing which of the 50+DC and territories you could be in. Some jurisdictions permit a name change with at least one parent present, some go by what the child wants, some permit a change to the the divorced parent who has full custody, some require consent of both parents. It depends on the state.
The simplest way is to show up and say that she is in contempt of court and this would avoid a claim in replevin (money owed) or outstanding court order.
A legal name change can not happen if it would be 1. against social policy 2. is intended for an illegal purpose 3. would be a detriment to the child in the case of minors. A judge has wide discretion in these points. Judges generally encourage families to all have the same last name. In some jurisdictions, they have prevented gay couples from changing to the same last name, although this has been overuled in most cases. A judge will almost always deny a name change if there are outstanding claims against the person and the judge has reason to believe that the change could be used to avoid that claim.
If you show up to the court with a copy of the contempt of court order, the judge will most likely deny the change. He doesn't have to grant it, but he must have cause. Just showing up and protesting is a good way to make him hesitate.
The proceedure is this for name changes in most jurisdictions:
Court Petitioner files motion for change of name
Court date is set for 2-3 months in advance
Court orders the publishing of the notification in at least 2 newspapers + other notification as required by jurisdiction
Petitioner signs affidavit as proscribed by the jurisdiction and hands this to the Prothonitory or Clerk depending on the State.
On the court date, petitioner swears by oath or affirmation the jurisdiction requirements, usually requires oath that this is not intended for a criminal or other wrongful purpose.
Judge asks questions as to why the name change is wanted
If judge is satisfied, he will sign the affidavit along with a court order to change the name.
Some jurisdictions also require a title search or similar record to show no outstanding leins have been taken out
This document is given to Social Security and Naturalization offices, and to the DMV. After this, these articles are delivered to credit card companies etc.
Total process costs $100-$300 dependant on the state.
No lawyer necessary and most often no lawyer is used.
When one is in contempt of court, they go to jail.
2007-02-23 09:02:42 · answer #1 · answered by Discipulo legis, quis cogitat? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you really can't get Public Defender, you might have to defend yourself. Some places, they have free workshops. Use the search engines. Check to see if you still have to pay child support if the name change is affected. I'm sorry 7 years is too long not to speak up. You could have notified the court yourself. You should have sent registered letters stating that you haven't seen your daughter, blah, blah. ( And kept a copy of the letter and receipt for yourself.) You could consult with a lawyer. give you advice.
Daughters need their fathers, more when they're older than younger. Good fight and good luck.
2007-02-23 08:39:32 · answer #2 · answered by kitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While I understand your plight, I would like to ask why you didn't fight it. You had a court order and you let her mother control your visitation rights. Why didn't you take her to court? If you have the order and proof of custody payments, you would have won. You better get on the ball!
I'm sure you can find a low cost lawyer to help.
2007-02-23 08:32:23 · answer #3 · answered by CC 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for what you are going through. And I commend you for paying child support. Get a damn good lawyer and take her to court for not allowing you to visit. Get her back for what she has done to you... and maybe it will show your daughter that you weren't a dead beat dad, she just had a crappy mother.
2007-02-23 08:38:51 · answer #4 · answered by niker_bokers16 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you have paperwork that says you have a specific visitation schedule, you can ask for police accompaniment to her home in order to pick up your daughter.
As for the name change? Show up and challenge it! You don't need a lawyer to do that.
You can check your state for a legal aid program. They may be able to help you.
Good luck!
2007-02-23 08:34:19 · answer #5 · answered by Meg M 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
This happened to me, when my son was 4 yrs. old. I decided, He's my son. When he wants to know his father, he will find me.
He did. All children will. He's 24 now, I met him at the age of 16. I love him, and we have a wonderful relationship. Perhaps as well as him and his mom.
Important to remember. Never put her down or say disrespectful things about her. She is and will always be the child's mom. Keep the good memories in your heart, cry if you need to. ( I did.) Be yourself. Dios te bendiga.
2007-02-23 08:41:34 · answer #6 · answered by "El Padrino" 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you are right. court decrees are only as good as the people
subject to them. no one will enforce it. trying to improve the
relationship is your best bet. eventually your daughter will want to meet you and check you out, but she will not have that power
until she is about 15 or so (usually). so you can just wait until
then.
2007-02-23 08:37:17 · answer #7 · answered by Sufi 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you had wanted to see your daughter, you would have. No one can deny you visitation except a court of law.
You daughters name cannot be changed without your consent unless she is an adult. If your wife had managed to get it change, she would have been in contempt of court.
Shame on you for not making the effort to see your daughter. It may be too late but you need to try to have a relationship with her....
2007-02-23 09:40:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 7⤋