I have heard this quote many times from several of my family members. Everyone in my family excpet my mom are opposed to me having a relationship with anyone who isn't Black. My mom is very open-minded and she says he's good as long as he treats me like a queen that I am. This makles me mad because my dad has had several white girlfriends after my mother and he has said things like Black women aren't good enough and they are not attractive and doesn't like dark skin. This has made me resent him because I feel like he's saying that I'm not good enough or pretty because I'm dark.My dad is dark light Wesley Snipes and my Mom has a beautiful cinnamon shade to her.While I have a copper shade. My dad currently dates a fair-skinned Black woman. But he has told me that he would never allow me to date someone who isn't Black. This is a common attitutde in my family. I have alot ot Black pride, and love my brothers to death. But sometimes I fee like they don't love me back.
2007-02-23 08:08:54 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
I have a natural hairstlye short afro and I'm trying to get an afro like Erikah Badu or India Irie. But many of my brothers have been mad at me for cutting my long waist lenght hair. I don't regret it at all. Love love my natrual look. I'm starting to notice that non-black men are noticing me. And this Hispanic guy had asked me out and we've been friends for a while now. I've been tellin gmy dad that he's a great guy. My dad wants to meet him. I'm scared how he might react. The guys I'm goign out with is Salvadorain and my dad hates Salvadorians. What should I do? My dad wants to meet him. My mom already meet him and she adores him.
2007-02-23 08:13:32 · update #1
Listen to your heart babygirl, to your soul and your mind. Anything that you feel is good for you- go 4 it !!! As we all know, Love is not about color..."free ur mind, dont be so shallow, be color blind and de rest will follow"---cudnt help but write this nice lyrics here.:)
From the way you always describe urself I can see clearly that you're a young Beautiful sweet lady, only 16 yet so mature. You could try to educate your Dad one day by telling him what you think/feel from the bottom of ur heart. (including the possibility of him having issues regarding color, eg. he's from older generation, so he's strict, he's also unfair and a hypocrite.If he can date them lighter skinned women you can date ANYONE you desire.
And its sad n unfair that ur own Dad makes you feel sometimes "so damn unpretty" like TLC did say...Black is Beautiful, and i mean a dark brown skin like urs with all ur body and facial features. Tell him (ur Dad) how u feel about all that.
Remember..the blacker the berry the sweeter the juice :) Love
2007-02-24 11:31:00 · answer #1 · answered by senorita spanish rose 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are YOU listening to other people who they themselves are trapped in their own prejudices? Where does the Messiah say that "only a black man can marry a black woman"? Did someone NOT happen to give King Solomon the wise the memo from G-D that his Egyptian bride was Black!?!? Pardon me for my slight digression here. If people weren't supposed to be with people of different ethnic races or even skin coloration's, then don't YOU think there would be some kind of communicable disease or some thing that people outside of these categories would contract just for being near other people? Sorry about being so long winded. The point I'm attempting to get across to you is this: So long as BOTH partners are honest, love each other, care for each other, are faithful to each other, who cares what one or two family members may say about it? Let those people with the problems go to group therapy for their problems. You don't have any. Neither does the young man you are with!
2007-02-23 08:21:39 · answer #2 · answered by mangamaniaciam 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Diversity is the spice of life, I always say!
Little One, I come from a cultural back ground that looks a bit like a jigsaw puzzle of light brown to black only! I have never heard my mother or Aunts or Uncles or anyone else in my family ever tell me that I couldn't date or marry someone because of their skin color! I don't suppose I would have listened if the had! ((SMILING))
I love the fact that I come from a family who never looked at skin tone as a pre-face, to anything! It is for this reason we continue to have so much hate in this world. I am part Black, Spanish, and Indian! I have pale skin, and dark brown eyes and black hair! I have a sister with blue eyes, blondish hair, and my grandmothers lips and backside! ((Smiling)) We don't care what we look like, because we love each other and that's all that matters. If we start picking and choosing our mates by what makes everyone else happy, we might as well give it up!
Skin tone is only a problem when you can't see past the nose one your face! I don't care what science may say or find out in the future. To me, a human is a human is a human is a human! ((SIGH)) Had to take a deep breath for that sentence! lol
You do what makes you happy! Your family will come around, and by the sounds of it, you have a Mother like mine! So you can't ask for anything more!
Life is precious! So be safe and be happy!
Good Luck
2007-02-23 08:27:30 · answer #3 · answered by chocolateforever 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are right on the money. Your father is a hypocrit no offense. Have you noticed that alot of black men think being with a blond white chick is the best thing in the world. No matter how fat or ugly it is like they hit the jackpot. I feel sorry for the black girls because it seems like most black guys would rather be with a blonde. Very strange. I know that is not always the case but just look around.
2007-02-23 08:13:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Society has put White women up on a pedestal of beauty for centuries. A lot Black men only see White, latino and light skin women protrayed as sex symbols. Regardless of that, there are a lot of Black men and men of all races that love the unique beauty of Black women. I say that interracial relationships are beautiful, but what I hate is when a person says that their own race isn't attractive or good another for them and their going to only date outside of their race. I have dated a White guy and he loves all women no matter the skin tone. Both my parents are dark skin Nigerians and they always taught me to not see color as a barrier against loving someone.
2007-02-23 08:18:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am honestly surprised that your dad, of all people, would say that. Talk about racism. The color of your skin does not matter, feelings between two people who love each other do. It is rather unfair that you be limited to a particular group of people when entering into a relationship. That is your choice.
Your dad has some unresolved chip on the shoulder he needs to get rid of.
2007-02-23 08:20:04 · answer #6 · answered by Karan 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not a black thing...its a people thing.
You'll find the same attitudes in other races and religions, in nationalities.
Your dad sounds like those black men black women talk about who only date light and white because he's ashamed of his blackness. So sad.
Don't worry about it. Ultimately YOU have to live with who you date and marry and what not. For some its very important to preserve heritage...for others we're all the same.
Do what is best for YOU because what is best for YOU is best for EVERYONE!!!!
2007-02-23 08:15:30 · answer #7 · answered by Lotus Phoenix 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Why? Black men do it ALL the time. Especially when they've made money and made something of themselves.
What's good for the goose is good for the gander, go out with whom ever you wish. Don't get caught up in this black double standard web. You can be proud to be black and still date or marry someone who isn't.
2007-02-23 08:14:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
In no other country do black women have a problem dating other ethnic groups. Even in Brazil and Africa where they have much bigger populations of "black people" they don`t seem to have a problem with interracial dating. SO why do you ? Don`t sit around and wait for someone to appreciate you. Go where love is. You are probably missing out.
2007-02-25 14:53:46 · answer #9 · answered by Julio M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you find any man attractive, his so-called "race" should not enter into it as a reason to either pursue a relationship or walk away.
Compatibility in interests, humor, philosophy, and character are what should count after that. But make sure he's a good kisser.
That's the acid test.
2007-02-23 08:21:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋