When we were dating everything was good. We had good communication and good sex and then we got pregnant and got married. Now after a year and a half I cant stand him. The only thing he talks about is football and he complains about his job. He never helped take care of our son until I started working nights and he had to. I tried kicking him out but i worked with his grandmother and she said she would fire me so i let him stay. I like him less and less everyday.
2007-02-23 08:01:07 · 15 answers · asked by ? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
get out of the situation. First, find a new job. Although legally she can't fire you for splitting up, she'll find a way. Find a job, and tell him that he has a month to shape up or he's out the door. You can't stay with someone because of children, it will be worse on the kids if they see you both miserable all the time.
And you said several things in your question that show you've all but given up already. Specifically, you said you like him less and less every day. It's time to move on.
Good luck.
2007-02-23 08:06:08 · answer #1 · answered by ski4ever1977 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All that I can say is before you both start to hate eachother, leave! When children are invovled I know that sometimes you have to keep thinking that you've got to give it another chance for their sake. I've done that a handful of times in the 6 yrs I've been married. But I live by this rule:
When the bad times out weigh the good, and you seem to cry more than you laugh ,then it is time to get out and salvage what friendship you can, so that your kids can see you two stand together even if you aren't together if that makes any sense.
Granted the baby is young now but you will be forever linked to this guy. He is the father and a part of you deep down will love him because he helped create your child. Put your baby first and make sure he never grows up thinking "My mom hates my dad but everyone thinks I act just like him so does she hate me too?"
I'm going to agree with the guy who said to get a new job, then tell husband that he has a month to convince you why you should stay in the marriage. If he doesn't, leave but try to atleast be friends with him! For your son!
2007-02-23 08:14:24 · answer #2 · answered by roo_1683 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If it has reached such a point there are a few options - Counseling seperate or together, separation, or divorce. It seems to me that you have had so much you are at number three of my countdown. I went through much the same, except my ex was ...lets just say a lot more evil. If you do opt for 3 get a damn good lawyer, record all phone calls between you and your soon to be ex ( there is good and affordable equipment at Radio shack), and be prepared to live your life as a nun until this is over. I would suggest a Guardian Ad Litum be appointed by your lawyer so that there is a fair view of the situation. Be prepared is my greatest advice I can give you...Any evidence you can obtain, bills, film, etc...get it while he is there...I only wish I had done the same - God Speed.
2007-02-23 14:08:21 · answer #3 · answered by CherryCheri 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
To stay with your husband for the sake of the children, is the biggest mistake. Children inherit what they see growing up. To see two parents who don't share love, gives them the wrong concept of what marriage is supposed to be..
Don't let the excuse of his Grandmother firing you be a reason to get out. I am sure there are agencies in your community that can help you.
2007-02-23 08:16:21 · answer #4 · answered by lariat_sonata 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
let me tell you - my husband and I have a 10yr old daughter - we've broken up and gotten back together several times. This las time I moved out - but I can't stand not being with my daughter - so I came back after they asked me to. This time I'm staying - no more going back and forth. You guys need counselling - or something - you are probably thinking you want someone else and the grass is greener on the other side - but let me tell you - normally it's not. Good luck.
2007-02-23 08:06:17 · answer #5 · answered by Kelly S 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you really think you don't love him anymore then just move on. Its not worth staying if theres no love and its best for your child. Children know when parents don't get along and they will grow up thinking thats the way marriage is. Don't ruin your child's life and yours. As for your job, get a new one. There are so many jobs out there. Move on.
2007-02-23 08:14:37 · answer #6 · answered by muñeca 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is part of the early stages of a marriage where the rules and expectations are still being defined. You are going too far with this. You need to get through this. You can. Get thyselves to a counsellor.
The biggest thing you both need to do is stop being so selfish.
2007-02-23 08:13:31 · answer #7 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't stay in a loveless marriage just because of children, it only hurts them not help them. They can see now no matter how old they are that their parents don't love each other and it makes it hard on them. Get a divorce and find happiness
2007-02-23 08:08:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all: stop to expect anything from him. You are alone and you have child. You feel betrayed in a way and you hate him, and all that because you were expecting something else.Clearly, he is afraid of family obligations to death. Look in his eyes and ASK help of him, he doesn't get it what do you need. Say you cant make all by yourself, you need his help. Sometimes cowards turn to be better humans then we think if given a chance...
If it doesn't work...kill him.
2007-02-23 08:38:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
seek counsiling. I read a study in readers digest that said couples that were thinking about getting a divorce but decided to stickit out said they were happily married five years later.
2007-02-23 08:51:03 · answer #10 · answered by Coyote81 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋