After 7 years i finally got the balls to kiss my best friend. But im confused, everytime we ssee each other she wants to make out, but she also has a boyfriend. She tells me she wants to be with me and how much she loves me, but i mean i thought she would already have broken it off with her boyfriend. What should i do? Should i wait for her? Whats going on in her head lol?
2007-02-23 07:22:54 · 33 answers · asked by Chunk Deuce 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
OMG!! i don't know what you should do maybe she's scared to break up with her boyfriend or something!! I wish my best friend was like you...I'm in love with my best friend and i've told him, he's single but i'm not...but i'm scared to break up with my boyfriend, because i'm scared that my best friend might now want to go with me...anyway you said should you wait for her. well i would if i was you lol!! Anyway good luck! =)
2007-02-23 07:29:43 · answer #1 · answered by Becky<3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to her about it, ask her what's going through her head, and whether it's better if you two just stayed friends since she's already in a relationship and stay her best friend until she can make a decision.
Personally, my own sister is known to have more than one boyfriend at a time. She doesn't call them her boyfriends, but she lets them know upfront that she isn't looking for a committed relationship but just a time to get to know the guy, etc. Kissing is a part of it, but she also develops a friendship before thinking of settling on a single guy. She calls them sometimes "her half-boyfriends" where she will only be kissing one guy while still dating others.
But I guess that's a culture thing, and depending on the guy or girl.
I would say that you should not feel guilty about kissing her, she's not married, it's just her boyfriend. But I wouldn't force her out of her relationship with the guy, just keep on being her best friend, always there for her, go on dates with her, treat her like your girlfriend.
She will choose the guy who treats her and respects her the best. But if it really bothers you that she's with this other guy, mention it lightly to her, get her to speak her mind without any pressure on what she choses.
I can probably bet that you two are still young (20's or something younger in late teens), so she feels either attached the other guy still, while having conflicting feelings because she really likes you. My sister has liked two guys equally at the same time, dated both and kissed both within a 10 day period.
But since she is still young she will always be around and her idea of an ideal boyfriend will change. She will eventually break up with him, but you being her best friend for 7 years will always be the best choice.
You have a special relationship and I would treat it very carefully. don't feel guilty about it, go ahead and kiss her. Tell her how you feel, and don't put pressure on her for her decisions. If you want to know what's on her mind, ask her politely. Then wait if you wish, but it's up to hear what she will decide.
But I encourage you to go ahead and treat her like your own if she has no problem with it. Boyfriend is not a committment... fiance maybe, and marriage off limits.
2007-02-23 07:36:42 · answer #2 · answered by natalia j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most women have been taught it is up to the man to make the first move. I think that if she had no feelings for you she would not have stuck with you for 7 years.
She most likely has a boyfriend just because she needed that special attention, but since you kissed her and she liked it you should do it again. SO KISS HER and act like a boyfriend too! Being best friends first is the best way to get a real loving relationship going. I wish you both the best.
2007-02-23 07:35:15 · answer #3 · answered by Aliz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U brought this on yourself my friend. If u wanted her to break with her bf when u 2 got together then u should have waited until she had done so before u kissed her. She knows that u r aware of her situation and she probably thinks that u are cool with it. I'm sure that she does like u and probably is getting the emotional support from u that she isn't getting from her bf. If u have a problem with being the "other guy" then u should tell her that she's gonna have to break it off with her bf if she wants u. Simple as that. Good Luck! I'm kinda in a similar situation but I'm making sure that the breakup is done before i start getting caught up on my friend.
2007-02-23 07:31:42 · answer #4 · answered by Vince R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen girls who sit there and tell u how much they love you and want to be with you, but have a boyfriend just like the luxury of you always being there. I am not doubting her feelings for you, but I do not think she is going to leave her boyfriend anytime soon. And if she does, you will get one of those " I just got out of a realtionship lines." Personally, I would just brish it off for now. Do not wait for her, because you will be disapointted. And in her mind she has a boyfriend she likes, and a makeout parnter, life is good! She doesnt want to change lol. Do not wait for her, you will not get the result you want! Not trying to be negative, just realistic!
2007-02-23 07:30:34 · answer #5 · answered by alibell88 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i would say that all this time she has been having the same feeling towards you, she may be trying to get rid of the boyfriend she has, so she can be with you. Ask her plan out if she is going to brake off the other relationship, or not, so you are not in limb waiting for her to decide.
2007-02-23 07:52:27 · answer #6 · answered by Ladyofathousandfaces 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you like kissing her, and she likes kissing you...then why stop?
But it seems more than chemistry between you two.
You said she told you she loves you, but hasn't broken it off with her b/f...well maybe its simply because she isn't sure how you feel....have you thought of that?
Have you actually told her exactly how you feel about her?
Cause if you haven't, then maybe she is holding off on ending things with her b/f cause she thinks the relationship between the two of you is simply physical....and that you have no desire to connect with her on a higher level.
2007-02-23 07:42:42 · answer #7 · answered by J_Critic 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got to tell her that you want to pursue something with her and that she's got to decide if she wants you or her boyfriend. If the kissing with the boyfriend doesn't bother you, kiss away. If it does (and it sounds like it does) she's using you and having her cake and eating too until you draw a line in the sand and ask her to choose.
2007-02-23 07:39:11 · answer #8 · answered by SteveB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably doesn't want to hurt the other guys feeling. But you need to tell her you can't wait forever. And that it's going to hurt the other guy more if he finds out about the 2 of you. Or she could just be playing the both of you.
2007-02-23 07:26:48 · answer #9 · answered by **Red** 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her you don't think you guys should be doing what your doing until she breaks it off with the other guy. If she doesn't want to break it off with him then you should find someone else because it's only going to turn out really bad in the end.
2007-02-23 07:27:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋