Why do people so obsess about what other people think about them?

Question

What they don’t know, is that people wouldn’t spend their valuable life time to think about your life; or would you spend your valuable life time to think about other people’s life? Life is short and time is fast, every second is so much more valuable than gold, it is a really basic concept, but it is also a really realistic concept, don’t you think so? Don’t be so upset about unhappy event, because educated people will not spend their time to gossip behind your back. People who get into the gossip habits are mostly loser type, it is because they don’t have a goal, or they do not have the ability to challenge life, therefore, they just spend most of their time gossip about other people business. Follow your goal, because when you become old, nothing is matter any more.
(A little lesson to help people understand this basic concept ^_^)

“When you become old, nothing is matter any more” It is an acceptable statement. It has two meaning; what people think about you and what you think about people. Would you care about the stuffs that happened 50 years ago? Eg. someone didn’t pay you back 500 dollars, punched you in the face, stole your money, gossiped behind your back, made you fired from a job etc… Secondly, would people care about a retired old man/women? A retired old man probably spend most of their time travel around, do family house work, babysitting, gardening, hangout at old people institution etc… No one gonna care if you were a jerk when you were young etc… This is what I really mean. I didn’t mean old people are useless because they can do many amazing things that you could never be able to imagine. There are many famous old men out there and they are still working, not retire yet ^_^ (Stephen Hawking worst than an old man ^_^ Dalai Lama, The Probe, etc… ^_^)

Answer 1

~I absolutly could NOT agree MORE!!! I get soooo tired of dealing w/ other peoples shallow, fear-fed insecurity!!

Answer 2

Depends on the age. When you're a child you don't worry about what people think, that's why children can be so honest. As you get older though and enter the teenage years you begin to start worrying about what others think for a variety of reasons. Teenagers are very egocentric in that they think very much about themselves and how everything affects them. For example they worry about zits on their face because they're worried that everyone who looks at them and sees it will think it's as big of a deal as they do, they belive that others will feel the same, have the same reactions as they do, which is just not true. The reality is that everyone around them is too busy thinking about what everyone thinks of them to worry about a minor blemish. Another factor is the blitzkreig of messages sent out from television and media. Actors and singers aren't anything but prerfect nowadays and manufacturestrs market products whose hook is that you don't look good and this will make you look better, especially for women. And yes, insecurity and the need for acceptance is also a factor, we are after all, a social animal and will always look for acceptance from the herd, we always want to belong somewhere because that's how were built. As you age you realize it dosen't matter as much but sadly the game continues, then you start buying houses and cars and all other kinds of status symbols to prove you're better than everyone else becuase that's what you've been taught to do in the capitalist society of america. Our econimy is based off of one person beating the other and we're taught since birth to be competitive, it's our culture, that's another reason we worry so much about it, we want people to think we're better, we want to "win." At any rate those are only a few of the reasons, it also boils down to personal motivations as well and those are all individually based.

Answer 3

For the most part, what you say is true. However, I disagree with you about nothing mattering once a person is old. I know of many people who could be considered old, who continue to make a positive difference in their lives and the lives of others.

Answer 4

You are absolutely correct to a point. People who have made choices that land them in trouble with another whether it's with the law, parental authority, etc had better pay attention to the fact others are trying to get them to look at themselves.

Answer 5

Basic need to be loved and accepted is not met, for ALL ages.
Obsession with seeking approval stems from neglect or unhealthy and magnified need.

Answer 6

Low self esteem!

Answer 7

Because that is the society we live in !!!

Answer 8

paranoid