BEAUTY BEHIND THE EYES
She's so beautiful,
On the inside too.
She's so beautiful,
Through an' through.
There's no way to disguise,
The beauty behind her eyes.
And that's what I see.
Believe me.
When I look into,
The beauty behind the eyes.
The hair that frames her face.
And the smile,
Perfectly placed.
All pale the blue sky,
With the beauty behind the eye.
Her eyes,
So full of laughter.
I see in them,
Everything I'm after.
Beauty within.
Beauty without the lies.
Beauty behind the eyes.
With a heart that's pure an' golden,
She's an angel,
Wings unfolden.
And as I've told her,
The beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Copyright © 1993 by A~
All rights reserved.
2007-02-23 07:10:42 · 7 answers · asked by BigMac2xk 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Books & Authors
I think it's a good poem. It's very sweet and sentimental it seems. I guess you're saying the beauty behind the eyes is her soul...so really what makes her beautiful on the outside is the inside that shines through and is reflected on the outside of her eyes looking in. Okay, so when you got that far it sounds kinda deep. LOL Or maybe you're the one that's beautiful because it's you she sees and so maybe it's love behind her eyes.
2007-02-23 07:40:02 · answer #1 · answered by Jade D. 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is by far not original. In fact it's quite banal and rife with cliches. "She's so beautiful/ On the inside too" is a cliche, not to mention that the poem ends with a cliche.
I don't see much that sets this poem apart from anything else- it's forgettable. Had the language been different and elicited more emotion than what was used, it could have been be a good poem.
If this is your first attempt, you owe it to yourself and your work to do a careful analysis of what makes good emotive phrasing and the wording used to achieve that end. Also, if nothing else, DON'T USE CLICHES!!!! There is no faster way to turn a decent work into a laughing stock than using cliches.
Good luck with future endeavors, and I hope that they are better than this example.
2007-02-23 15:52:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not deadly original and breath taking, but it's nice and decent, and if it's for a lady, I think she'll like it. ...Just "The beauty behind the eyes" thing - you could change it a little, as to me it suggests "The beauty of the eye sockets".
Lucky: posting an answer that says "no comment" is really, really not cricket.
2007-02-23 15:19:15 · answer #3 · answered by jlb 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is nice. To me, it begs to be sung. Do you write music too?
2007-02-23 17:17:17 · answer #4 · answered by suzykew70 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not earth shattering....but it is very nice. I am sure whoever it was writen for would love it.
2007-02-23 15:52:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice
2007-02-23 15:18:08 · answer #6 · answered by Matt G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no comment
2007-02-23 15:17:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋