I am in a lesbian relationship and am dating a much older woman, she has 4 children. When I met her she was unhappily married and I was involved. We fell in love with each other, she got a divorce and I left my partner after a year. They both share custody of their children, so she gets them one week and he gets them the other so basically, she has them 2 weeks out of the month. Its been three years and I still haven't met her children because her husband doesn't allow it. She says she goes to therapy with them but i don't know if I believe it. I am a frustrated 24 year old because I see her 2 week out of the month, whenever she doesn't have her kids, Is this fair?
2007-02-23 07:03:17 · 5 answers · asked by KrisRose 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Kids were a part of the equation when you entered this affair...and it started as an affair. It is hard, but if you make her choose between you and her children, you are going to lose. If the problem is she won't come out to her children, then maybe she has issues with being a lesbian.
Just hand her a heart shaped locket that says, "To thine ownself be true" and let her decide.
2007-02-23 07:16:42 · answer #1 · answered by will s 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she is afraid that if the children tell daddy about mommys girlfriend, he will try to get custody all the time. In many areas, that could be a real concern, even though trend is to be more open. The only other possibility is that she is not ready to out herself to anyone yet. If she is out publicly, but does not want you to meet the kids, I would guess that this relationship does not have long for this world. The father has no standing on what happens in her house if the divorce is finalized. Good Luck!
2007-02-23 15:35:14 · answer #2 · answered by Brent W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a mother, I can agree with what she is doing... children are fragile when something like a divorce happens & especially if the family is involved with a therapist, it may be whats best. I can't say that I would allow someone to control my life as to whether my partner can see or be with my kids though.
I would say to stick it with her but explain to her what your thinking. Be glad you see her the 2 weeks that you do; it could be none. & If she's a mother down to the core of herself, her children will come first. Her lover/partner second.
2007-02-23 15:40:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they're divorced, the husband has no right to say anything about what she does. It's her life.
2007-02-23 15:12:20 · answer #4 · answered by Eve 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well she might not know how to tell her kids that she's lesbian. but i would stay. and if it's the husband not allowing then there nothing you can do.
2007-02-23 17:16:17 · answer #5 · answered by shadowdemon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋