I have been seeing my gf for the past 10 months and love her deeply. But is love enough. Its a long distance thing and the closer we get to our move in date she has a problem with everything I do and all my friends. I know I have not changed and am not willing be because to me I am just perfert. Two more weeks and counting. If she has these problems now what about when we move?????
2007-02-23 06:54:05 · 11 answers · asked by always wondering 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You shouldn't have to change for a relationship to work, but compromise and consideration are key in a relationship.
I highly suggest you stop and take a minute to think about your own flaws and her complaints. You're perfect? I always thought none of us were perfect.
My suggestion: sort out these problems before you move in. Otherwise things are going to just get worse.
2007-02-23 06:58:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
well the only thing that I can say is talk it out
don't leave anything in the hold cause after you move in together if you have grudges you are just gonna end up having a bad experience. Also I think that you need to come down from that cloud of "perfection" no one is perfect, there is no such thing. Also keep in mind that when you commit with another person t is all about compromising and that implies changes that some one "perfect" can not do.
2007-02-23 15:21:24 · answer #2 · answered by wanna_help_u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right to say that love, in and of itself, is not enough. There are lots of practical aspects to relationships that must work in order to not make each other crazy.
If you truly deeply love this woman, then I urge you to take a risk and talk with her about it. Her behavior may just be the physical manifestation of fear and anxiety over making such a big move. This would be natural for most folks. Communication is the glue that holds a relationship together and the lubricant that keeps it moving.
Give it a try. You might be able to get past this so that your first night together is as magical as you hope it might be.
2007-02-23 15:01:17 · answer #3 · answered by Greg C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Frankly, with any potential move-in-together relationship I would have recommended living NEAR each other for a time with increased contact in a variety of social venues BEFORE deciding to join households.
You have not had that in this long distance relationship, no matter how you feel about her. You are now seeing a different facet and that is the kind of thing you need to know more about before living together.
As for feeling you are perfect...none of us are...and ALL of us have room to grow and change....you may want to take heed of this.
2007-02-23 14:58:34 · answer #4 · answered by sage seeker 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think love is enough. SOME compromise usually comes into play in any relationship BUT to have a problem with everything that you do and all of your friends???
In my opinion, it sounds like a recipe for disaster (possible abusive relationship).
Please know that the above is just one person's opinion and it's quite possible that I am wrong.
Good luck in whatever you decide to do.
2007-02-23 15:01:01 · answer #5 · answered by jasgallo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you're friend might have some issues herself like, NOT being sure that moving is right and therefore is causing friction, hoping that , you will do it.
Like, yes, she wants you but, not sure it's right etc..I would leave things as they are if possible hoping that time will take care of it.
2007-02-23 15:03:26 · answer #6 · answered by SwissAK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she's scared. im guessing she loves you deeply, but she just really isn't ready for all of this. Hence, the, problem picking. I would do the same thing. I probably have done it, actually. Just make sure she's ok with it all........
2007-02-23 14:57:48 · answer #7 · answered by Bekki 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
1st of all your not perfect, the bigger picture, are you perfect for him/her and the other way around.
Try watching the movie Good Will Hunting
2007-02-23 14:59:39 · answer #8 · answered by Diana B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try to change some thing in you reships
2007-02-23 15:10:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it wont last if thats the circumstance
2007-02-23 14:56:49 · answer #10 · answered by crazybubbleblower 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋